Dis 'n Dat

A Chritmas Tale

This glorious spring weather makes me think of Christmas. Ah snow! How I love Maine. Yes indeed, here in Nowheresville, Maine we got almost 12 inches yesterday. Nothing like hiding Easter eggs in snow banks. Oh well.

Anywho...

Like I said, this weather reminds me of Christmas so I thought I would share one of my fondest memories.

I was married before (gasp!). I am, in fact, damaged goods. But I digress. So my ex-husband's family is somewhat dysfunctional. His dad is on his 4th marriage. Well, it was our little tradition to spend Christmas Eve with his dad and step-mom (who I happened to absolutely ADORE!) and then spend Christmas with his mom (who I can't stand). When I say mom, I mean his honorary mom who did most of the raising. Even after his dad packed his shit and declared, "I JUST WANT TO LIVE!" (true story) ex-hubby stayed with this woman. So yes, I had 3, count them, 3 mothers-in-law. YIKES!!! Okay, sorry for all that background.

Well, we were over there for the usual merriment. Tacos and margaritas. Yes, nothing says let's celebrate the birth of our Savior like getting smashed on liquor and eating Mexican food.

Now I shall set the sceen. Everyone was enjoying their fill of the tacos. FIL had already put away at least 4 or 5 Rainers (think Lone Star beer but the Washington state version ) It was almost time to open presents so we are wrapping things up in the dinning room. The living room is just off the dinning room and you take one step down into it. So ex and I used to have this miniature dachshund that FIL loved. He would always want to play tug-o-war with her. So he starts taunting her with one of his socks. Well naturally she was more than happy to get a little rowdy. So drink in hand, FIL was really getting into the tug-o-war session. He was completely unaware how close to the step-down into the living room he was. It happened in slow motion. He lost his balance and started falling. It might not have been so bad, but he was drunker than Cooter Brown and he fell right into the Christmas tree. The beautiful, beautiful Christmas tree. It was spectacular. Carefully decorated with antique and glass ornaments. FIL is all over the place. Smashing presents, breaking ornaments, getting cut and bleeding like a stuck hog. I look at ex and his sister. They are sitting there all red in the face. Not because they are embarrassed, but because they are trying to stifle some raucous laughter. God knows I was too.

FIL is a huge Johnny Cash fan and as we were leaving that night we thought we would honor that love for the Man in Black by singing a tribute.

"I fell into a Christmas tree of presents..."

HAPPY EASTER Y'ALL!!!