Down the Rabbit Hole

A New Working Piece

**The beginning of a new piece to work on..**

She mumbles in her sleep and somewhere between her waking consciousness and fitful sleep, you can hear her secrets. I would lie there next to her and eavesdrop, and that is how I found out about you. When she breathed your name in the dark, I knew. My chest tightened, my heartbeats hurt. I closed my eyes and squeezed out silent tears. My world came crashing down on me and I knew what I had to do to make it all right again. I threaded my hand through hers, kissed her bare shoulder and then I began to plan how I would kill you.

My rage was so pure and so complete. There was suddenly, simply, only one option. I would wait for you outside the office. I’d ask you to come for a drink. I’d tell you I needed to talk. I’d tell you that my wife was having an affair and then I’d watch your eyes. Your mouth would twitch; your eyes would close for a second. Then you’d ask me if I was sure and I’d magically control the urge to hit you with my chair. I’d nod, solemnly and we’d have another drink.

We’d leave that bar and you’d hug me close with one burly arm and tell me it would be alright, that we’d “get the guy” and I’d “fix things with Julia”. I’d walk you to your car, and I’d say goodbye as you fumbled for your keys. You’d never see it coming; the gun would be at your ear before you could draw another breath. I’d make you turn around to face me slowly, I’d stare menacingly into your eyes before I pulled the trigger, never even giving you a chance to tell me you were sorry for fucking my wife. I’d leave you in the parking lot, and I’d drive home with your blood on my clothes and fingertips. I’d shower while Julia slept soundly and then I’d toss my clothes in the furnace. It would be done. I would grieve along with Julia at your loss – though for different reasons- and try to put my life and my trust back together with her.