Timing is Nothing

(Chpt 10) The Worst Wedding Ever

By 1 pm I was off to work with a broad smile on my face. I was a genius! I could not have been more proud of myself for my quick thinking. I started my computer and did the usual spin, once around in the chair to clear my head. You really did have to be prepared to deal with wannabee models and supposedly classy photographers.
I began the work day doing confirmation calls reminding the clients of photo shoots or auditions within the next 24 hours.
"Hi this is Josie from Faceshots calling just reminding you that you have a cover shoot tomorrow at 9am...yes we supply the make up and hair...no, I'm sorry, we don’t supply the underwear or the nipple tape...Great, and we’ll see you tomorrow then! Bye!"
Similar ramblings continued for about an hour with various clients. After awhile I'd find myself on auto-pilot only half paying attention to who was on the other end of the line and their inquiries.
All day long folks came in and out of the front doors but I paid little attention to anyone. I was busy google-ing wedding stuff. Decorations, food, gifts and registries, dress suppliers, tailors and tux rentals. I was going to do whatever I could to make things easier for my best friends and if that meant ignoring skinny models and strangely flamboyant photographers, so be it! I was prepared to make that kind of sacrifice. I was so involved in my research that I didn't notice Marlene staring over my shoulder.
"Don’t you need a man in your life before you look up those kinds of things or have times changed that much since my glory days?" She was joking but I found the need to defend myself.
"Yes, I suppose if you're sane you do but this isn't for me. Do you remember my friend Ava?" She nodded "Well her and Mark are getting married! He proposed on Saturday night." I smiled proudly as if I was entitled to some kind of bragging rights.
"That's lovely but shouldn’t she be looking for her own wedding dress?" I believe she was implying that I had bad taste but didn't ask.The answer was visible to the naked eye, on the screen was a horrible white, fluffy, ruffled, big sleeved mess that I had found on a Vintage wedding webpage.
"I think she's getting cold feet already" I explained what had happened the night before and mentioned the way it played out this morning. I told her what I had planned for tonight and how it was going to fix everything and kick off the wedding celebrations.
"Are you sure that's going to help?" she seemed genuine concerned.
"I hope so. I've never been married or been that close to any one who was in the process. I'm just doing what I would hope someone would do for me if I was ready to do whatever it is that Ava is going to do."
"The thing about marriage is, getting married is the hardest part." Marlene was not often a serious lady, she was more up-beat and bubbly, but right then, she was down to earth, solemn and serious.
"Aren't they the same thing?"
"No! You can't plan the rest of your life; no matter how hard you try, so you take it day by day without any control. You accept that. But getting married is a process that usually involves months of preparation with opinions from everyone you know! As much as you try to make it about you and your partner, it's about what everyone else will enjoy too. It's a hard couple month. Ben and I almost didn't survive our engagement."
"What happened?"
"He kept saying "whatever you want dear". I love it now but then I just really wanted to know what he thought of the flowers or the table settings or the bride’s maid’s dresses. I wanted him to be more than the guy who would just stand up there waiting. I wanted him to be apart of the process; I needed him to be apart of the process! The mothers were eating me alive!"
She continued to tell me about the time her mother-in-law-to-be hated her wedding rehearsal hat so much that she sabotaged the feathers with a cigarette and other irrelevant anecdotes.
For the next hour or so I thought about what she had said to me. It made sense, or it sounded like it did anyway, but it didn't match up to what I had been told my entire life.
"It's the happiest time in your life"  concluded by "it's the happiest day ever" and "It's not hard unless it’s not meant to be". It  just wasn't compatible with what Marlene had just shared with me. I was so glad right then that it wasn't me getting married.
By four in the afternoon I was doing the head nod at my desk. I couldn't keep my eyes open anymore and I couldn't focus on anything, not even wedding junk. I think I was closer to half asleep than half awake when a little old man snapped his fingers rudely in my face. I was startled and jumped to attention.
"I'm sorry, how may I help you?"
"I'm looking for a Miss. Josie Howard?"
"I'm right here." I smiled a big cheesy smile and waved just like I had been taught.
"Right, well then. These are for you" From below the counter he picked up a massive vase of flowers! They were all shape, colors, sizes and types, like nothing I had ever seen before.
"Are you sure?" I took the vase from the little man with a concerned look on my face and placed them on the back counter.
"That's what they say" and he walked out the doors into the windy Monday afternoon.

--

When I arrived home, Kelly and Steph were already there making the penne Alfredo, salad with raspberry vinaigrette and girly drinks just as a 'Type A situation' instructed. When Ava, our Type A, was having problems, this was the procedure we followed. Type J, K and S were similar but altered to suit the individual.
Ava was the most health conscience so her food wasn't that bad. Kelly was big into pastry and cookies, Steph liked breads with dips or spreads and I liked salty foods like popcorn. It didn't matter what the problem was, by the time the rest of the food was done and gone, the Mac and Cheese was in the microwave. When the food stopped coming, the tears or yelling started so we always tried to keep our mouths as full as physically possible.
"You guys are life savers!" I placed the flowers on the hall table discreetly. "What are those Kelly?"
"These are slushy vodka slimes with a hint of raspberry"
"They're an awful color" I laughed kicking off my shoes into the corner.
"What's all that?" yelled Steph over the roar of the blender.
"I thought we'd help plan the wedding!"
"Your horns are showing" she commented with a smile. "What are you up to?"
"Nothing! It's just something that might brighten her day" I faked an innocent look and went to my room to throw on my pajama's.
We all had the same pair of PJ's for these epic gatherings. The bottoms were a plad print and the tops were solid tee-shirts. Each of us were victim to a different neon color. Ava was orange, Kelly was green, Steph was yellow and I was pink. Together we looked like a bunch of high lighters but they were so comfortable that we didn't care how ridiculous we looked.
I came out of my room, relieved to be out of my work clothes just in time to see an angry looking Ava burst through the door. Mid-step she paused and looked at all of us skeptically. She rolled her eyes, huffed off to her room and shut the door a little to hard. We continued doing our duties as if she hadnt been as bitchy as all that.
Five minutes later, swearing under her breath she stompped over to the kitchen table and sat herself down firmly at the head of the table without even saying hello.
"Ok. Lets just get this over with." She folded her arm and stared each of us down individually. Steph grabbed the drinks, Kelly the food and I brought all the folders I had dragged home.
"Oh perk up Bag!" Kelly snapped "You're getting married, we all want it...so shut it." Ava was stunned into silence. She looked at us each again but this time with a desperate pleading look in her eyes.
"She's right Ava. What do you have to complain about? You have the man, the job, the dream! The rest of us are still playing with Barbies compared to you" Steph added.
"Don't look at me to rescue you!" I raised my hands up in the air as if to surrender. Without even the blink of an eye Ava knocked back her drink in one gulp and started to cry.
"Fine. You're all mad at me for getting married. Well I dont want to! I'm not ready to be someone else or to end my career or pop out like half a billion babies. I dont want to play house forever! I'm not ready!" Through her wailing she was almost inaudible.
"Honey!" I launched myself to the floor beside her and looked upat her while I hugged her knees. "where is all of this coming from? All you've talked about since you and Mark started dating was how he was the one for you! What changed?"
"Nothing changed but..."
"But what?" Kelly asked, sitting on her other side.
"I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WANT!"
"A! You're talking crazy! Just because you're getting married doesn't mean you life is over."
"It's so easy for you to say Steph, it's not happening to you." She held up her glass indicating she was ready for a second.
"Are you saying that you dont want to go through with it?"
"...No..." Ava spoke into her glass.
"You don't have to change, he wouldnt want that. For f*** sake! You dont even have to take his name if you dont want to" I didn't mean to but I was getting fed up.
"Ok I get it! I'm scared ok! I'm really scared." She stood up and starting walking around the kitchen like she had that morning. "Everything will change. Eventually it will be him and I and kids! Collin already left, now eventually Josie wont be around, what if we can't do these emergency girls nights any more? And I'm going to kill the mothers! They're already consipring about grandbabies and what schools they want them to attend."
"Ava sit down. The wedding is months away and it's not their wedding, its yours."
"Steph is right. Nothing is changing right now" Kelly added quickly.
"Its going to be a very gradual process and we will be here every step of the way, and thats never going to change."
"Promise?" Ava was looking right at me as she steadied her breathing. We all hugged her in response.
"We dont plan on abandoning you until theres a real crisis...like you're hair turns grey or your botx doesnt work." I couldnt keep my mouth shut but it worked. We all burst out in full giggle fits that ended with the four of us in tears.
"I have a game and it will make everything better."
"Do tell" Steph said excitedly as she poured the next round of drinks.
"The Worst Wedding Ever"
"Excuse me?" Ava looked horribly offended.
"Just let me finish It's called the Worst Wedding Ever. We are going to plan you're nightmare wedding so you know what you dont want and have a good giggle in the process"
"It'll be fun Ava" Kelly was bounching in her chair.