Somewhere Else

Chapter 4: Jane

Waitressing was not her first career choice. She’d never had much grace in her life, so she was terrified of the idea of dropping every meal put on her server tray, but the promise of making big tips on weekend nights with her looks alone lured her in. It was the only job that was going to work for her right now anyhow.

In High School, she had it all. She was a cheerleader with plenty of friends. There was happiness all around her. She knew the entire football team, which was eventually part of the problem, but she only got to know them after she made friends with Brecker.

Brecker was a strange guy back in High School. The year that she met him, he had to be one of the most popular jocks in the whole school. While her motives honestly weren’t to boost her reputation, she found that as soon as she started taking with him in the halls and at lunch, everyone wanted to get to know her. That was so unlike anything she’d ever known before. Usually she was just plain Jane with a pretty face. She wouldn’t go too far.

Despite everyone wanting to get to know her and having plenty of friends, there were no romantic interests on the horizon. While she probably shouldn’t have been worried about it at that age, she wanted to experience High School life for all it was worth. When Homecoming rolled around, she held out for all of her good guy friends to ask her, but they eventually paired off with new girlfriends or with girls they’d had interest in for a long while. Just when she’d given up all hope, she was surprised by one character.

During the middle of her fourth hour, a delivery was made right to her desk.  Two dozen white flowers and a teddy bear that would promise to be challenging to carry through the halls. There were a few balloons attached to his arms and a handwritten note reading: When I’m with you, you always lift me up. Go to Homecoming with me, and I promise I’ll sweep you off your feet. Well how could she refuse an offer like that?

At lunch, she waited with this mass of surprises. He’d given himself away with his handwriting. No guy she knew could write as pretty as Brecker. When he finally strolled up, acting as though he was completely taken aback by everything she hauled around with her, she bombarded him with hugs and kisses against his face. Not only did they go to Homecoming, where he truly swept her off her feet, he continued to do so for the next two years. They were officially an item.

If hanging around Brecker had improved her status, dating him made it skyrocket.

Along with Brecker came a nice package of every sports team and a guy named Oskar. When Brecker was busy training or working out, Oskar was usually hanging around and she could talk to him. He was sweet, but not in the same way that Brecker was. He was a good source of information as well. From him, she learned that Brecker’d actually been incredibly overweight just the year before. That explained why their relationship had never really gotten physical: he was insecure. He also explained that he came from a pretty strict family, which was why she never got to meet his parents. She didn’t care, she loved him.

A few months into their relationship she learned something about him that Oskar never told her, which he probably didn’t know at that point. While most relationships blossomed from lust into love, theirs went from friendship to love and then to lust. At least Jane was lusting after him. He was cut, he was cute, and she was willing to commit her life to him. That winter, she offered herself, despite never having really kissed him. He looked stunned. She was hoping it was a good thing. When he dressed her back up and kissed her on the side of her face, she knew something was wrong.

Even though the rejection stung, she quickly understood why he couldn’t take her like she wanted. Brecker fancied boys, but knew his career as a jock would be over if anyone knew. He never meant to use her, he genuinely loved her, and he admitted he was selfish. Caring for her the way that he did, he didn’t want anyone else to have her, to hurt her, to break her. They agreed that they would continue ‘dating’. No one was ever the wiser.

However, during their Senior year Jane grew restless. She’d helped hide his secret, she’d shared her life with him, and they were the best of friends. On campus they could always be seen holding hands and flirting with one another and they always went to each other’s sporting events. The yearbook had claimed they would be the first couple to marry as soon as school was over. That was the year she fell in love with James. (Check notes to see if that’s what his name was.)

James was the quarterback of the football team. Brecker objected, but not because he didn’t want to share her. He told her he wasn’t quite what she thought he was. At football practice, he’d brag about how many chicks he’d banged. Sometimes he’d brag that he’d done more than one at a time. He was an all around sleezeball who was advertising he’d changed his ways over the summer. Jane bought into it but Brecker sure didn’t. No one could alter themselves that drastically over a period of two months.

By the end of the first semester, Jane and Brecker were officially broken up. Despite this, they still remained close as ever and they were the best of friends. James was jealous of the relationship and took every opportunity he had to threaten Brecker to keep away from his girlfriend. When he wasn’t busy threatening him, he was boasting that he’d snatched her out from beneath his nose, like she was a trophy to be won, traded between the two of them. For that he hated James.

When the second semester started up, Brecker had withdrawn from every sport he’d ever played. Scholarships that promised to pay his way through college were withdrawn. James thought it was because he’d stolen Jane and was expecting for Brecker to take action, so he forbade her from seeing him. Though she wasn’t pleased with the decision, she too thought it was for the best. Brecker needed to move on. They had no idea why he’d really stopped playing.

Graduation night Brecker invited Jane back to Oskar’s for a party. They hadn’t hung out in forever and Oskar was missing her as well. When she refused, she pulled him aside to explain. She was pregnant. James had proposed and they’d be married soon. If she could have him at the wedding, she certainly would have invited him, but James didn’t really care for him and she didn’t want to cause trouble, not so early in their married life.

She had lots of pictures of that day. Brecker didn’t look at a single one. She couldn’t really blame him.

Right after the baby was born, James started hanging out with his friends more. Sometimes when he came home she could swear she smelled perfume on him. He told her she was stupid, of course she could smell perfume; he’d been out where other women had been. He was spending time with women who weren’t fat from babies, women who still knew how to have fun.

At first she thought it was only fair that he get some time away from home. Having a new baby was hard work and she didn’t want him to feel too weighed down, not right after High School where he was used to partying all the time. Surely he’d get it out of his system and then be ready to play dad to Winter Rose. Just as soon as she’d reassured herself of that, his drinking became a problem.

There were things that he told her that she’d never dare repeat to anyone else. Some nights he’d hold her close, press his hand flat to her stomach, and tell her that he wished she’d had an abortion instead. If she hadn’t had the baby, then they’d be happy together. The nights where she craved the feel of his body so close to her, to feel him making love to her again like they used to, he’d tell her he couldn’t stand the thought of her ruining him again, that he could find better.

Shortly after, he did. When she suggested that he spend some more time at home, he laughed at her. When she demanded it, he hit her. So stunned, she didn’t even know what to do. After that, she could look forward to his violence after a night of drinking as her only form of affection. Never before had she been exposed to such a thing and she didn’t know what to do, didn’t know where to turn. Her parents thought the world of James and so they’d never believe her. She was afraid that she’d be considered a bad wife.

One night, when he’d hurt her so bad she could hardly move, then went out again, she knew something had to be done. It was a long shot, yeah, but after dialing the same number for two years straight it was the one that popped into her head. Mrs. (whatever  Charlie’s original last name was) answered the phone. Recognizing the voice immediately, she had no problem sharing her son’s new number with Jane.

That night Brecker saved her. He showed up, packed up everything she owned, and took her and the baby far away from where she lived. At the time he was still with Oskar, living with him, so they stayed the night there. The very next day though, he went out and got them a three bedroom apartment. She didn’t know that he really didn’t have the money to do it. That was the year he truly became a writer.

Ever since then, they’d lived together. She worked nights and weekends, when the business picked up best, and Brecker stayed home with the baby. He learned how to feed her, how to change her, and loved playing with her. He was the father Winter never knew before. Best of all, she felt completely at ease leaving her precious daughter in his care, unlike how she felt with James.

The divorce finally went through a year later. As Winter got older, James started demanding more time with her. Jane didn’t want to share, knowing that it was simply for the sake of looking good to the courts and not having to pay as much child support. For now, because of her age, he would take her on major holidays. Jane hated to be away from her on such special occasions, but it beat letting him have her two weekends a months. She was still too young to actually know when such events occurred and until she realized, she was fine with the situation.

When word got back to her that he went out drinking with his new girlfriend all the time and left her in the care of a friend though, she hauled him back to court. There was nothing to support her testimony and James had plenty of character witnesses he could provide if need be. Winter would still go with him for Christmas. Though that upset it, it didn’t bother her as much as what he said to her outside of the courthouse, just before she could get away from him.

“You try to keep my kid from me, and I’ll take her where you can’t ever get her again.”

Jane retorted that it was a threat she could report to the Judge and James had just one more thing to sling her way.

“I’ll tell them you’re raising my daughter with a fag. We live in American Jane. People are going to side with me, especially when I express my concern that he’s teaching her that his way is the right way. No one likes a queer in the home, especially raising their kids. Either you get him out or I’m going to take her for good.”

She knew he wasn’t kidding either. The only option she had was to move out and try to make it on her own. If she couldn’t make enough money, he’d show that to the courts and show them that he made a sufficient amount working as a Coach for a High School. If she stayed with Brecker, he’d pull his little stunt. She loved him dearly and was ever grateful to him, but she couldn’t stomach the thought of losing her daughter.