Pen of the Gryphon

Disclaimer: The author is certifiably insane...

No refunds...

“This is a work of fiction. All the characters and events portrayed in this book are fictitious and any resemblance to real people or events is purely coincidental.”

So says the disclaimer in every book of fiction. This little piece of text resides just about the publisher information, so that by the time the reader can verify the identity of the publisher who printed this blatant rip-off retelling of the Holocaust, they know that the publisher is totally clueless to the fact that they are publishing something that is so totally obviously resembling an actual event. This of course, makes the reader become disgusted with the publisher’s lack of insight, so they boycott the company, start protests and marches, and the publishing company dissolves in the stream of media coverage, law suits and general bad publicity.

Okay, so maybe that entire scenario was a product of my strange mind. But really, look at that disclaimer. Look really hard… Harder than that… But not THAT hard… Sheesh! You trying to fry your brains or something?

Ahem… Read any book on characterization. They will tell you to observe other people’s traits and habits: how they wear their tie, what they do when they are eating. Then you take those traits and make a character out of them, combining things characteristic of many people and smushing them into this one little person made of paper and ink.

Soooo… Any resemblance to an actual person is entirely intentional. You wanted your character to have a voice like Bill Clinton. You wanted her to be a completely obnoxious brat like your little cousin, who smears lipstick on all of your posters on the wall. You take that instance and stick it in a book to vent your frustration at her, just changing names so that her mother can’t sue the pants off you for printing her daughter’s identity without permission.

That disclaimer is completely false. While yes, the book itself is a product of the author’s mind, and there may be things that could never happen in real life, but the people and the events have to be grounded in some sort of Earth reality, otherwise the audience would never get it. Unless they were from planet 347.B in the Nubular System. And even then, they might wonder why the heck you were writing, to the exact detail, the character of public enemy number 1, who was currently all over the news, and making him your hero. What kind of sick person are you, anyway?

See what I am saying? Probably not. After all, you guys are from Earth. Those 347.Bians are all over what I am saying right now. They are all nodding their brain pans in agreement. Except they don’t have brains. So… Yeah, never mind…

Anyhoo, that is my little rant for today… Ciao and I hope you all are having a great weekend!

~GryphonFledglingOfSilverWings