\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
    November     ►
SMTWTFS
     
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
28
29
30
Archive RSS
SPONSORED LINKS
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/539092-How-Do-I-Love-Thee
Item Icon
Rated: 18+ · Book · Comedy · #1206540
Middle-Age Spread is NOT a Condiment!
#539092 added October 2, 2007 at 7:53pm
Restrictions: None
How Do I Love Thee?
Even though I poke fun at my husband, I really do love him. I figure he must REALLY love me since he hasn't thrown me out of the house after my recent misadventures. With that in mind, I began to think of the many different ways that I show him I love him. I wanted to do an inventory for my own peace of mind.

Here's what I came up with:

1. I clean your nose hairs out of the bathroom sink.
2. I laugh at your 'not so funny' jokes the first hundred times I hear them (after that - no holds barred!)
3. I don't bother you when you watch every football game, football highlight show and football analysis show.
4. I pick-up your dirty underwear and socks from the bedroom floor - YUCK!
5. I tell you your man-boobs aren't THAT big.
6. I don't hold my ears when you sing along with the radio (I just put cotton in them!)
7. I know to leave the house whenever you start any home improvement project so you can swear and cuss freely.
8. I still love your tried and true sexual advances. Even your old standby, "Come here - I want to show you something."
9. I listen intently to your work stories even though they all start the same way - "A fat woman came over to me today , , ,
10. I don't complain when you sprint naked from the bathroom to the bedroom after taking a shower.

The order might need a little re-working, but otherwise, this is a pretty good list. In fact, I just may show it to him to remind him that I do love him. On second thought, he's better off not reading this. I'll just have to tell him I love him.

© Copyright 2007 Victoria (UN: vlm0325 at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
Victoria has granted Writing.Com, its affiliates and its syndicates non-exclusive rights to display this work.
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/539092-How-Do-I-Love-Thee