500 Words a Day

23 December, 2007; Makeup; 241 Words

I feel really guilty.  I have not written in a very long time!  Today, I will make that up to you, readers.  I will write and write and write, filling up four days worth of crap!  Now I have to figure out what to write about.  Right now, I am exaclty four sheets to the wind, as opposed to the customary three sheets.  This is not said for effect.  I am typing with the speed and clarity that only a truly drunk writer can.  I am not drinking anything worth consuming.  Pabst Blue Ribbon may be cheap, but it is cheap;  being an alchoholic voluntarily, and when possible, I will drink Pabst Blue not because I am a great connoisseur of truly American beer but because I love the flavor of the beer.  My love of Pabst is surpasses solely by my love for Mickey's.  Ahh, Mickeys, but it can't be so.  A six pack of Mickeys runs the same, and sometimes higher, price of my second beloved Pabst in the twelve pack form.  Pabst it is I say.  Who am I to talk about favor, though.  I'm the kind of son-of-a-bitch that drinks and then, and only then, chooses to write with regard to no one slinging shit at everyone that passes by unknowingly.

The greatest consequence of this behavior is that when I crawl out of my very comfortable recliner tomorrow morning, I will regret posting all this garbage.