The Chill Kid with the Cool Hat

So I'm faced with the decision...

The decision could kiss all these timely updates in my journal goodbye, but in the end, I'd be happy. I'm not exactly sure what I want right now. Me and Corinne have been broken up for about 2 months now. The single life has been pretty great. Do I want to get back into a relationship?

I know for a fact things between me and Corinne are over. I have no intentions of going back to that. I have to say, she was completely right. I do deserve someone better than her. All of my girlfriends (with the exception of Tara, but her mindset was still there) have been younger than me. Usually 2 years or more. I'm finally realizing now that I'm done with the younger crowd. Tattoos? Peircings? Spending all your money? Excuse me, I'll be over here paying my bills while living in the really real world. When Corinne told me she was moving out of her house into an apartment with 2 friends (she just starting hanging out with 3 months ago, I might add) I think that was the last bit. She's getting more tattoos, most likely fooling around with Joe again, and now she's moving into a place she can't even afford. I really am sick of the little kid bullshit. Even though we're not together, it just annoys me to see her go off and fail without even thinking. I give it two months before she ruins her credit and moves back home.

Now, there's AJ. She's got a good job. She's got her head on straight. Best of all, she likes me. I told her today that I wasn't really sure what I wanted. We're getting pretty close and I'm still up in the air about her. I could kick myself for saying that now. I know I like her, why the hell didn't I just say I want a long term relationship, dammit? I know there's just something trying to hold me back from her. I don't know what it is though...fuck it. If I don't know what it is, then obviously, it's not important enough to stop me from this. All I do know is that I want to sing those love songs to her and mean them. I want to be with her and goddammit, I'm going to fight for that.