My December

Sober

Sober
And I don’t know
This could break my heart or save me
Nothing’s real
Until you let go completely
So here I go with all my thoughts I’ve been saving
So here I go with all my fears weighing on me

Three months and I’m still sober
Picked all my weeds but kept the flowers
But I know it's never really over

And I don’t know
I could crash and burn but maybe
At the end of this road I might catch a glimpse of me
So I won't worry about my timing, I want to get it right
No comparing, second guessing, no not this time

Three months and I’m still breathing
Been a long road since those hands I left my tears in but I know

It’s never really over, no

Wake up

Three months and I’m still standing here
Three months and I’m getting better yeah
Three months and I still am

Three months and it's still harder now
Three months I've been living here without you
Three months yeah, three months

Three months and I’m still breathing
Three months and I still remember it
Three months and I wake up

Three months and I’m still sober
Picked all my weeds but kept the flowers
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Word Count: 923

Prudence cracked one eye, trying hard to ignore her splitting headache, while also trying to figure out where that blinding light was coming from.

While reaching out a hand to prop herself up, and holding her head with the other, her hand slipped on an empty bottle, and she ended up on her back, in the same position she has been seconds before.

Then Tera's face floated above her head. "You okay?" she asked.

Prudence blinked at her, but didn't answer. She couldn't. Her tongue felt big enough to take up her whole mouth.

Tera reached out a hand and helped Prudence up.

She swayed, but found her balance after a few seconds.

"Pru," Tera said, supporting her with a hand under her elbow. "I think you need some help."

Prudence's gaze shifted from her kitchen table, covered in empty Smirnoff bottles and a half-empty bottle of tequila, to the empty bottle of rum she'd slipped on while attempting to get up.

She sat down on her couch and wrapped her arms around herself. "No, I don't."

Tera sat down beside her, concern shining in her eyes. "I'm not saying you should check yourself into rehab or anything, but I'm sure an AA meeting wouldn't hurt."

Prudence looked around her messy apartment to avoid Tera's sad eyes, but only managed to come face-to-face with the wreck she had become in the last three months since signing her divorce papers.

"Okay," she agreed and then rested her head on Tera's shoulder.



~*~



Prudence hurried out of the AA meeting a week later, rushing to get away from these people, who obviously had a worse problem that she. She was not an alcoholic. She just had a tendency to drink her troubles away.

She escaped the crowd of people who gathered around to talk after the meeting and walked briskly into the night air, inhaling the sent of sweet freedom.

"Hey!"

Prudence heard the male voice call out, but ignored it, assuming it wasn't addressing her.

"Hey, Miss! Wait up!"

Curious, she turned around and spotted a man jogging toward her. His blue eyes, fixed on her, seemed to be illuminated in the moonlight, and his short brown hair blew in the wind as he rushed to catch up with her.

When he came to a halt in front of her, he straightened his brown suede jacket and put his hands in the pockets of his khaki pants.

For some reason, Prudence felt self-conscious in her loose jeans and light hoodie. She pushed her long hair out of her eyes and wondered what the man wanted.

"Hi," he said, putting out his hand. "I'm Kyle."

She shook his hand. "I know." She had listened to his testimony with only vague interest during the meeting. He started drinking at sixteen when he began hanging out with a bad crowd and was now trying to turn himself around.

"Right." He flashed a brilliant smile. "Can I walk with you?"

She had no excuse so she kindly accepted before heading in the direction of her apartment.

"So, what's your name?" Kyle asked. "You didn't do a testimony, so I don't know it."

She ran a hand through her hair. She hadn't done a testimony because she had no plans to return, and therefore didn't want everyone knowing her business.

She stopped walking and turned to face him. "Look, I don't need help. I came to this meeting because a friend asked me to. I don't need an accountability partner or anything."

He put his hands up in surrender and smiled. "Alright. If you say so, but here-" He handed her a card, his name and number printed in large, black letters. "Call me if you want to talk. I can tell you need it."

He walked away without another word, and she watched him disappear the way they came.

I can tell you need it.

Like he knew. He didn't know anything about her, not even her name. He didn't know what she needed.



~*~



Kyle heard his phone ring in the back of his mind and forced himself to wake up. He rolled over in bed and glanced at the clock on his nightstand. Large, red numbers told him it was two thirty in the morning.

He flipped on his lamp and reached for the phone.

"Hello?" hr grumbled.

When he heard only soft sniffling on the other end, he knew it was her- the beautiful woman from the AA meeting.

Sitting up, he remembered her long, brown hair, curvy body, and pale skin. He also remembered the pain he had seen in her eyes.

"Hello?" he said again.

"My name is Prudence," the woman finally choked out. "I'm the woman you met after the AA meeting."

"Hello, Prudence," he said, mimicking the AA routine.

He listened to her gulp air quietly and then heard her say, "My husband left me three months ago. I didn't start drinking until I signed the divorce papers two weeks later, but I haven't stopped since. I spend most of my mornings trying to remember how I spent my nights."

Kyle listened as Prudence gradually calmed and explained how she turned to alcohol when she was upset.

He felt sorry for her, but he also knew that tonight would be a turning point for her, and it would be a while before she touched alcohol again.

He knew when he hung up an hour later that she was strong enough to face her troubles.

And he would help her.