Spam Haiku Story

An Fit Dance

"Think you got no chance?
Don't sit there in baggy pants,
get trim an' fit, dance!"

Sittin' up in bed with Lou Ann, sippin' on a beer, watching the late show on the local cable channel when this commercial came on. "Hey, I know her!" I shouted out, before even thinking about what I was saying.

"Who is she, Jimmie? Someone you ran with back when you was single?" she asked, half joking, as she reached for a fresh Marlboro Lite.

Actually, she was Maxie, a gal who used to be one of my "special friends" down at Miss Kittie's place before she left, but I sure wasn't gonna tell Lou Ann about that... Looks like she's gotten herself into a new line of work... Well, she always was pretty athletic, if you know what I mean...

"Well, you gonna sit there grinnin' like a dummy or ya gonna tell me where you know this bimbo on the TV from?"

"Oh, it's no big deal, I think I used to sit next to her in high school," I said.

"Don't lie to me Jimmy, you ain't got no high school diploma!"

"I know I got no diploma, but at least I did go to high school for for a couple years!" I answered back.

"OK, fair enough....Hey Jimmie, maybe we should go down to her "Dancercise" place, give it a try. We could both stand to lose a few pounds..."

"I don't know Lou Ann..."

"Come on Jimmie, it looks like fun, not like real exercise! An' you used to take me out dancing all the time before we was married... You always were pretty good on your feet..."

"Well, OK Lou Ann, I guess we can go down there tomorow and sign up after I get off work, if you really want to..."

"Trust me Jimmie, this will be fun!"

"Well it should be interesting, at least," I said.

(And hopefully, Miss Maxie, being a professional and all, won't say anything to Lou Ann about my past "business relationships" with her.)