Snow Melt

Dear Santa...

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I know that it’s been a few years since I wrote you a letter. Therefore, you may have thought that I had given up believing in you. This is not true, I still believe in you. I have always believed in you. I will never give up my belief in you. I haven’t written you because I didn’t want to bother you with my small wants and desires, when there were so many needy and desperate people in the world that needed your help more.

However, something has recently come to my attention that you need to know before you start your Christmas run. As you know, I live in Las Vegas, which is just a stones throw from Area 51. While I don’t work at that location and don’t know anyone who does. Some extremely odd things have occurred recently.

Some very unusual animal sightings have occurred recently. The press hasn’t investigated these sighting because they were made by people on the fringe of society. People who couldn’t pass a security check if their life depended on it. If one or two people made the sighting, I would attribute it to too drinking too much rubbing alcohol. However, twenty or thirty people can’t be mass hallucinating at the same time. Then there are the rumors about The Rudolph Project.

The sightings concern animals resembling flying reindeers with blinking red and green noses. So far, about twenty or twenty-five of these flying reindeers have been sighted in the area. About three of these creatures are male and the rest female. At the last sighting several of the females were obviously pregnant and ready to foal.

I know these can’t be your reindeer since you have your own breeding program at the North Pole. It is, of course, possible that some of these reindeers are Rudolph’s offspring, especially those whose noses flash only red instead of red and green. After all, most of us know that Rudolph’s problem isn’t too much booze.

Santa, please be careful when flying over Las Vegas and the surrounding area. Because according to what is know about The Rudolph Project the Men in Black, who contrary to public opinion aren’t agents of the U.S. government or any other government on earth, are going to attempt to replace your reindeer with these alien creatures whose noses blink red and green.

Yours Ever,
A True Believer in Las Vegas

P.S. Before Christmas, you may want to check the genetic code of the reindeers assigned to pull your sleigh this year.

My response to the November 27, 2008 leading entry by kittiara