Snow Melt

Day 24: The Reason Santa Doesn’t Eat Turkey Anymore

WHO --- SANTA
WHAT --- SANTA ... KEELS OVER
WHEN --- AT A MEAL ON CHRISTMAS EVE
WHY --- __________
WHERE --- __________

Why, Santa thought as he watched his brother crave the 75 lb. Christmas turkey, does Harvey always get the biggest turkey in the grocery store.

“Maybe, dear,” Mrs. Clause leaned over and whispered in his ear, “it’s because he is a big fat turkey himself.”

“You’re reading my mind again aren’t you dear?” He leaned over and gave his wife a passionate kiss.

“Yes,” she sighed as Harvey gave Santa the first drumstick.

“You know, My Sweet,” he whispered in her ear as he gave her a big hug. “I always thought Harvey was a giant white rabbit not a big fat turkey.”

“That’s because, My Dear,” she stuck her tongue in his ear, “he never made a pass at you.”

“It’s nice to see a couple,” Harvey smiled as Santa cut a large piece of meat from the turkey leg, “that’s been married as long as you two have, still go in for foreplay.”

Santa cut the meat on his fork into smaller portions and then put a piece into his mouth. He chewed the meat 100 times before swallowing. As he went to take another piece of meat, he keeled over falling face down into the mashed potatoes and knocking the gravy boat over.

Twenty-four hours later, Santa woke up in a hospital bed surround by Mrs. Clause, half-a-dozen worried elves, a doctor, two police officers and three detectives.

“Well,” said Doctor John Hopkins, “you’ll be glad to know, that despite your wife’s accusations, your brother didn’t poison you deliberately.”

“What… what happened?”

“It seems, Mr. Clause,” said Dick Tracey, “that bird your brother bought was a genetic experiment. We’re still not sure how it got in the grocery store frozen food locker.” Detective Tracey took a deep breath before continuing. “That bird was a cross between a turkey, an ostridge and a mandrake plant.”

“Will there be any side effects,” said Mrs. Clause taking her husband’s right hand.

“Your husband is now allergic to both turkey, ostridge and various other kinds of fowl,” said Dr. Hopkins rubbing his chin, “I suggest you feed him beef or some sort of turkey substitute.”

“You mean I don’t have to eat my brother’s turkeys any more!”

“That’s right, Mr. Clause.”

“

Invalid Item  This item number is not valid. #1405205 by Not Available.