Pearls of Wisdom and Foolish Mutterings

Help. I've fallen and I can't get up

Lately I have felt like a sputtering car that goes in fits and starts and idles so roughly that it ceases to run whenever it comes to a stop for too long. That's me. As long as I keep moving, I may be sputtering and uneven, but I keep going. But when I see a stop sign coming up and I have to slow down and eventually come to a complete stop, even momentarily, often my engine stalls out. And getting it jump-started is not an easy task.

Even blogging, which has been my favorite activity for the last year, has become difficult for me. I've written any number of blog entries that I never post. For one thing, they seem to ramble all over the place. And most importantly, when I re-read them, they come across as having been written by a whiny, pitiful brat. So, my blog posts have been sporadic, at best. This month marks the anniversaries of the deaths of both my mom and my step-dad, so a little bit (okay, fine - a LOT) of melancholy is to be expected. And the death just last week of my wonderful step-mom, Kathy, has naturally added to the melancholy.

I don't like feeling like this. I much prefer my shoot-from-the-hip, happy-go-lucky self. I just don't know where she has gone to. Into hiding, I suppose. She's not fond of the dirge playing inside my head either. It's no picnic inside my head lately.

I did enjoy the Super Bowl on Sunday though. I wasn't even planning to watch it. As I've said before, I much prefer baseball over football. But Hubby got home from the ranch on Sunday and he turned on the Super Bowl. I was sitting in a recliner in the living room and frankly, I was just too lazy to haul myself out of that chair and go anywhere else, so I sat there and watched. And boy, oh boy, was I glad I did. I really got into it. I cheered, I jumped up and down, I screamed like a banshee. That was one of the very best football games I've ever watched. Just for the record, I used to be a bigtime football fan.

Back during the days of Terry Bradshaw, Lynn Swann and John Stallworth, I was a huge Steelers fan. Those guys were magic to watch. Then when we moved to Houston, I became a fan of Warren Moon and the Houston Oilers. When owner Bud Adams (who still holds the title of 'Most Despised" in Houston, in case you were wondering) decimated the team and then, in the ultimate act of betrayal to loyal Oilers fans, gathered up his toys and moved them to Tennessee, I swore off football.

After this year's super-exciting Super Bowl game, I may have to take a second look at football next season. Who can know these things? Of course, that means I will have to survive that White Water Rafting trip first. Sheesh.