Down the Rabbit Hole

Magic Dance

Spring seems to have come to my corner of New England at long last. You would not know it from the activity in the office though. We are very quiet and the lack of ringing phones is making my anxiety level peak. Something has to give soon or I fear the worst is yet to come. At least, the sun is out and the weather has improved enough to coax more people up into the skies. Warmer weather also seems to inspire my muse as I am working more, generating new pieces, editing and polishing up my port and getting things out on submissions. I'm still struggling with endings and titles for a few items and my larger project still remain largely untouched but I'm at least making an effort on several fronts at once. On the home front, things seem to be more stable. There have been fewer arguments and more laughter as we settle in more to the routine of our lives. My routine seems to be more and more domestic however, something I still struggle with occassionally. I'm cautious of becoming too much of a wife that I cease to be anything else. It can't be helped. My parents werehigh school sweethearts and my mother, who wanted nothing more than a family, was a stay at home mom and housewife, exclusively, for twenty-five years. Just when she believed she'd raised her children and could enjoy a life of her own and a more fulfilling relationship with my father, he left her. I watched my mother dilligently cater to her husband and her home for years and years until her life emploded. It is easy to see how I would do anything to avoid the same fate. It is hard to enjoy the contentment that comes with stability and security all the while, being aware that it can all go south on you when you least expect it. Then again, I don't think it hurts to stay on one's toes anyway, right?