I'm Studying You

Passing Out In America

Good evening my fancy lil internet denziens...long time no see and stuff. So I'm doing a really bad job of schedule-planning for myself and it's caught up with me. I did a tiny bad thing today. Tiny, compared to all the other bad things I've done in my 34+ years of doing bad things.

I called in sick to work today. And I wasn't sick.

I know people do it all the time. I've done it before. But I really kinda feel guilty, but I don't.

See, I've been busy so much that my relationship is suffering. I work, I come home, and I want to be left alone to decompress from the day. And by "left alone", I mean go online and check on my fantasy football team for an hour, and then spend the next two hours on Facebook spying on a lot of people I haven't had contact with in almost 20 years. We had a big breakdown over some things last sunday, when I was, of all places, at work. And it was set off over all things, through text messaging. Text fights are, by far, the least productive form of arguing. Anyone who has ever been misinterpreted in text form can attest to this. But I was able to spin it around in such a way that earned me some love, in less than an hour, and I only had to walk about 1/4 of the way home!

So anyway Studyees, this has been playing on my mind for some time, that I work so much, J and I do our catching up and get our work-talk out of the way, listen to some random bs, and then I disappear about three feet away from her to where I can relax. And that's how it's been for the last couple of weeks, after I moved my laptop into the living room desk and freeing up space on the kitchen table.

Can I tell you that I don't like distractions? I like to be attentive, and caring, but I get random bursts of info from her when I'm doing my thing, while she's doing her thing, which is watching tv while reading. Dumb story short, she can't be without me for more than 26 seconds.

See how that random mini-outburst interrupts how the story is going? A tip for random people out there, courtesy of The Library. Gratis.

So fast-forward to today. For some reason last night, I couldn't get myself to bed until almost 3am, even though I had to be to work at The Wall at 8am. This morning did not go well. My alarm went off, I was my typical cantankerous self, and for some reason, fell right back asleep. Woke back up at 7:40...not enough time to shower and get to work on time. And getting to work on time is another of my good intentions that seems to go wrong for me.

I called the store, told the manager that we were running a little late today and I'd be in soon. Courteous, right?

Courteous if I didn't decide to roll over and go right back to sleep.

I called him back at 8:30, in a sleep daze, and told him I wasn't coming in. I believe my exact words were "I've got it coming out of both ends". That didn't seem to appease him one bit, but it did amuse Jesstastic. Luckily, I've been slightly sick the last week, and have been feeling better, but played it a little bit yesterday. I will, however, be throwing my immune system under the bus come tomorrow morning.

So the whole point is, usually I just need my alone time. The perfect day to call in sick this week would've been any day but today, which is her day off. But since I requested off both jobs this Sunday so I could go to a bro-out with some old friends to hang out and watch football, I figured this would be a perfect day to spend time with her and have a nice day together running her errands and whatnot. So I woke up just after noon, dropped her off at her chiropractor's appointment, got my alone time with the Buffalo News at my place for longer than I expected, picked her up, did some shopping, got some stuff, and had some subs and chips for dinner. I basically did it for her. Well, and I was tired, I knew today wasn't gonna be a tough day at work, and it was the best chance to do it. Plus I was tired, obviously. But she deserved some of my time in a public setting, besides the work pick-ups and drop-offs. It was done out of love. Her remarks the other day that I should quit Walgreens because I'm so miserable lately made a bit of a mark on me, but it's silly to do that...yeah, I'll get way more hours now at Borders going into the holidays, but it's not something sustainable, even if it makes me happier but pays less, and I'll have less hours in February.

And I just got interrupted again by said princess, asking the true reason why I called in today. I manned up and told her it was to spend time with her. Then she reminded me how out-of-sorts I was this morning...not shutting off the alarm on my phone even though it was in my hand, looking for something in the nightstand cabinet that had no affect on my day, just totally blanking on this morning. Guess I was a little sleep-deprived, Stoggers...and I miss you guys. As evidenced by the nap I took today when she dropped Alex off at boy scouts. The sleep deprivation, not the missing...the missing is a different orange to this apple.

On a brighter note, it's getting way wicked cooler outside...not that we had a really hot summer, cuz we didn't here in The 'Lo. But the chill in the air and the turning of the calendar means only one thing...HOCKEY SEASON!! As a Buffalo spors fan, this is good news if the Bills are losing, until the the Sabres start losing, and they could go either way this year. I wanna grab my stick and shoot around a little. And the Bills....continue to confound me. They could be good, they won't be great, I don't think they'll totally suck, but they screwed me royally in Fantasy Football last Sunday. I hope I didn't mention that before.

Ohhhhh-kayyyy then Stoggers, this feels a little awkward but I had a good time, and I've gotta go put clothes away. It's a thing I've been trying to do for awhile and started before the actual day started. Chores...damn. Been good to be here. Hope it was for you. GOODNIGHT NOW!!

BONUS CONTENT THAT FITS THE WHOLE DEAL:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=01LShsarkaI&feature=PlayList&p=9BB3213FAB7D409A&p...

No, I won't go
I want to stay here with you