My Not So Private Journal

October 25th, 2009-- Guilty Pleasures

Alright, here we go, first entry on October 25th, at about 3:15 PM. It is fall up here in Montana right now, and it's really cold in my opinion. I am attempting to text one of my best friends, Kristi. I am sitting in my bed right now, and I really should be working on a history project, (guilty pleasures.) As I said in the description, I really have no clue why I am writing this. Maybe it's because I'm hoping to see how crazy people say I am, or maybe they, you guys, don't think that, maybe I am one talented person ( I know that's not true, but hey! it's worth the thought.)
So, let's get on with the basics. at the moment my thoughts are about school tomarrow. I really don't want to go, because A. I feel like s***, and B. because I hate 98% of the individuals that go there. The teachers are what really get me. This school system is nuts. It most likely wouldn't be so bad if they didn't go off their own curriculum. We, ( the students,) are not really learning anything. Plus, on top of it all, the teachers run around the classroom playing "supercop," instead of paying attention to what needs to be taught. My solution to that is-- send them to the principals office straight away.

I'm sure anybody that reads this probably thinks that I am insane by this point, but who knows-- maybe I am, or maybe, I am actually bringing up some good points.

Ok, so I am gay, and do I find guys attractive? Yes. Especially one by the name of Tyler. He appears to be the straightest person that you would ever know, thats just what I see. But many of my friends say that he is, or could possibly, be gay. That would be the most amazing thing ever. The only problem is, he is the hottest boy you will ever find, and me-- I wouldn't say that I'm ugly, but I'm definantly not fit for him. He stands at 6' 1". He has this amazing curly hair that hangs down to his mid- neck, and he has the most amazing smile. He picks on me a lot, but I don't mind, and he's not doing it to be mean. Kristi thinks he's kind of flirting, probably only because she knows that I like him. So another question- Am I Obsessed with Tyler? I think YES. He lives 5 blocks down from me too which is the best part. You will definantly see a lot about him along the way.

I'm not totally open to the world that I'm gay, only a select few know, and I have a few people in mind that I want to tell too. Here is the list of people that know:
1. Mom- well what more to say
2.Moriah--My first- not so best anymore- friend.
3. Tyka-- My "scene" (emo) b****-- shes cewl
4.Tykas mom - christina- not kristi- she is usually always there if I need her.
5.Kianna-- my mexi-asian friend- telling her that I was gay was one of the worst things in the world, I know she will tell somebody
6.Kermit-- Kalyla- she's my bisexual friend, drama queen though
7.Kristi- not christina-- she is my lesbian friend- the significant other of # 6.I can talk to her about anything, but her advice sucks.
8.Sandra- my high school friend-- she has had a hard life, but she manages to donate a little bit of her hope to me and everybody.
8.Johnathan- my brothers ex- partner (my brother is gay too. ) johnathan was cewl until i found out about the drugs.
9.My brother mell, he does drugs too, but you gotta love him, dont hear from him very much.
10. Maddie- one of the only african american people in the whole county- that confession kind of slipped out.-- bad time but I'm trying to trust her.
11. Emma- my ex gf- i feel bad because i didnt really like her because I was gay, she is one of my closet friends.
12. makenna- shes that type that has a short fuse- close resemblence to a fire cracker.

those are all of the people that know that i am gay. you will here a lot about them too.

This pretty much wraps up todays entry- I hope you guys leave reviews- you dont have to though- say anything be honest im open to all opinons

P.S.-- spelling really doesnt matter being as how this is a journal- youd see pictures if i could draw them on here