What a wonderful world!

Why, lord, just why?

I worked for the art exhibition today. Helped cut the thread, organize the paintings, and enjoyed it too. But when I gave the computer quiz today, my enthusiasm vanished, I won't get more than 2 out of 10 in it. Have to submit the new assignment.

I am a BBA(Bachelor of business administration) student, and computer science is for the engineering students. I took it cause I just wanted to learn programming properly. But the way I'm loosing points here! I wanted to excel particularly in this class, but I just can't perform here because of the circumstances.

My instructor is quite sweet and helpful, and that is what increases my woes. I don't deserve that sweetness, I really don't! The more I think about it, the more I feel bad. I know Allah Allmighty always tests my patience, and a lot of tears comes my way before an unexpected reward. I just hope I can make my instructor happy in some way, through my grades. But how? I've already lost more than 25 points in some way or other. My instructor knows I'm sincere, he helps me a lot but I just don't deserve those smiles, those encouragement...

Studies is the only field where I can dream big. But this time, my CGPA will be low, very low, I just know that. And why? Either because of the traffic congestion, or the broken car. I just wish I could walk like the other girls of my age, travel by public transport like my other friends do. I wish I could wear those beautiful footwear, the sight of which only makes me sigh!

Lord Allmighty, why me? Just what sin did I commit? Why am I not getting any chance to try this time? I had a CGPA of 3.25 out of 4 last semester, wanted to take it up to 3.75 this time. But how? When I know I'll get either a C or a D in computer science, the subject I wanted to learn so much!

I'd prefer to be in a wheelchair for the rest of my life, instead of living like this!