Book of Knowledge

Sunrise -lesson 3

Being physically challenged, I always used to think that my life was worthless. I was born as a premature baby at the 5th month of my mom's pregnancy, through an emergency delivery, cause she had tripped over a coconut and was badly hurt.

Obviously, my dad had to sign a bond to choose between wife and daughter. He chose my mom of course, but at the last moment, an intern doctor ventured to give me a life saving medicine. The medicine(injection) had to go into the body either through a hand, or through a foot. Now the part through which this injection entered, would become falty for the rest of the baby's life. The injection was shot through my left ankle, and since then, my left foot has become about two inches shorter than the right. I've got twisted veins instead of straight ones, and used to walk on my right foot and left fingers, cause it was not easy to put the left flat on the ground.

Since 2003, I had started using a walking stick. Used to wear orthropaedic shoes, but they are so heavy I don't use them any more. My blood does not circulate properly through my foot, circulation comes to a sudden halt very often and I always have to fight with a constant severe pain. This has become a part of life and I've learnt to endure it. Well, it has become a challenge rather, and I love to face the challenge.

For my mom's relatives, I was always a burden, they used to blame my dad for saying yes when the doctors told him about the physical challenge I was going to face, and asked him if they wanted me or not. My mom had to go through a lot for me. Not only my parents, I wouldn't be where I am now without my siblings around. Especially my elder sisters, they are my best friends. My brother never expresses his love and concern for me verbally, but his actions prove it.

My mom's relatives teased her for giving me an English Medium education instead of Bengali Medium. I got enrolled in a music school and an art school the day I got admitted to my educational institution. So studies and extra curriculars always walked hand in hand, and both are equally important to me.

My mom's relatives used to hurt me in any way they could. If they found me eating an apple, they'd go:"A lame girl does not deserve this expensive fruit, go eat a banana instead."

When I got my ears pierced, they told my mom: "What is the use of making her look pretty? you have 3 other daughters, who can walk, make them pretty."

Bit by bit, these taunts lowered my confidence level to such an extent, I didn't even want to try anything new. When my grades declined during my A levels, (I got 120 out of 600 in Accounting, which is an U or a failing grade), because I couldn't study much due to this footache thing, they went: "Well well, so your lame girl didn't even pass huh?" My mom had to be insulted because of me where ever she went.

I couldn't take this any longer and attempted suicide in 2007. My sister-in- law caught me slashing my wrists, and stopped me right away. I was told to disconnect myself from the world, and re-discover myself. So, I turned my cellphone off, disconnected the net, turned away from the tv, and buried myself in studies and creativity.

Within 6 months, I began enjoying life the way I am. Took the accounting exam again and scored a 480 on 600. Life is full of challenges, and now I enjoy every moment of life. Creativity can be a serious addiction too. And most importantly, I'm always encouraged to be creative. I'm a member of the university theatre, and I love my friends there. I love to study, and am willing to try new things. I love to draw and sing. I love playing my keyboard. Success is not mandatory, but I want to try. If I fail, no problem, try again.

Life is definitely not a bed of roses, but I've learnt to make it so.

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