If you can make it through the twilight

Overwhelming Purples

So.... who wants to listen to me bitch?  No?  Then you should probably stop reading this ....altogether, really, 'cause I bitch a lot.





Today.





First of all, I am a little worried about my cat but I’m also a lot broke so taking her to the vet really isn’t an option.  But she’s super skinny even though she has what seems to be a good appetite and doesn’t really get a lot of exercise… Anyway, this is all another story for another day....the point is that a week or so ago, she puked… or coughed up a hairball, not really sure, I didn’t see it … on Mom’s bed and she came unhinged.  She’s been pissy about it ever since.  To the point of buying a baby gate to keep kitty out of her room. 





Kitty, meanwhile, has been pissy right back.  Couldn’t be that she’s responding to the negative energy…no that couldn’t be it at all.  Anyway, this morning, I got up to find the bathroom door shut and asked what was up.  Kitty was locked inside because she was being “nasty.”  What this means is that she picked a fight with the other cat and Mom’s pissy so my cat gets time out.  So I let her out and she gets ambushed by Mom’s saintly, do no wrong, cat.  Now, I don’t know who started the first fight, cause I didn’t see it, but I did see who started the second one and it wasn’t my cat. *sigh*





Anywho, so then my day just spiraled out of control after that.  I got to thinking about all the other crap that upsets me - or outright pisses me off - and that lead, as it usually does, to immersing myself up to my eyeballs in Kill Hannah.





But here’s all the shit that came to me as my brain was working overtime:





Driving.  I don’t.  Never learned.  This is a sucky subject on many levels.  Mom is constantly bitching about how bad it stresses her out to have to get me places on time.  I try… I try very hard to not expect her to play taxi…ever.  I never ask to go anywhere.  I don’t complain when I have to wait for forty-five minutes after work because she’s late and didn’t let me know she would be.  But the thing is…and this is the other thing that frustrates me about driving….if it stresses her out so bad, she could do something about it.  Besides buy me a bus pass… She could get in the car every Saturday and every Sunday and take me out driving. 





But here’s what pisses me off about that.  All my life, I have taught myself just about everything I’ve ever learned.  So it really frustrates me, to the point of inciting actual anger, that I can’t just say, “yanno, I feel like practicing driving today,” hoping in the car and doing it.  No. I have to have someone else with me, who knows what they are doing already.  I’ve asked various people on several occasions, how the first people learned to drive.  There was no one to teach them, they just flew by the seats of their pantyhose.  So, why can’t I do that?  Because when they were doing it there were thirty of them in the whole country.  Now there are thirty in the span of a block.





I’m still frustrated but all the steam has gone out of my frustration, so I’m going to bring this to a close for tonight and hopefully have something awesome to say tomorrow (which will actually be later today).