Mara's Musings

When a blessing hurts ...

My sister-in-law, Connie, passed away Saturday morning. She was only 40. Her life has been full of medical maladies ... Juvenile diabetes, a car accident that left her in a coma for a month ... she was never the same, Dialysis, kidney and pancreas transplants, then the kidney being unknowingly nicked in a "routine" biopsy ... she nearly died from the internal bleeding before they figured out they had screwed up, and then this past July she had a stroke.

She has spent the last 5 1/2 months bouncing back and forth between the hospital and a physical therapy center. For every step forward there were three steps back. She continued to have strokes. Finally the doctors told us that the anti-rejection medicine she has been on for years because of her transplants, had weakened the walls of her blood vessels. This meant the strokes would continue. There was nothing we could do, but wait for "the big one." I felt like we were at Talladega. *small smile* Those of you who aren't NASCAR fans might not get that, but it would have amused Connie.

Her passing was without question a blessing. She is in a better place. She is no longer suffering. So why then are we? Perhaps we are selfish wishing her here with us. Regardless, she will be missed. I pray she is happy and the pain is gone. I know that one day I will think of her and smile again. It has been a lot of years since I could say that.

Rest in peace little sister.