Down the Rabbit Hole

Mother's Day

Jaden was five months old the first time Mother's Day became a holiday for me. Last year I was still struggling to find balance, not at home yet in my new skin but still floating on the euphoria of having a new baby. Looking back, the day seemed uneventful and remote. This year I looked forward to a day I really felt like I earned. I was excited to welcome the recognition and appreciation of mothering a growing toddler, managing a full-time job, trying to cook and keep a clean house often at the expense of any real "me" time. The day did not disappoint. I received surprise bouquets from both Fatih and my father and the fresh blooms filled the house with the smell of Spring. We had a beautifully graceful morning, waking to bright sunlight and Jaden's sleepy smiles. My husband graciously took the dogs out, a chore that usually falls to me and even entertained Jaden so I could break away and enjoy a little "me" time. The morning slipped smoothly by and soon we were on our way to brunch. We met my mother and Rick at Stonecroft, a lovely country inn/restaurant in Ledyard. Jaden behaved almost the entire time and her playful smiles were the perfect compliment to great food and the live classical guitar. We even managed to sneak in a decent new family picture before leaving the grounds. Without a real nap, I expected Jaden to be monstrous but she passed the rest of the afternoon with grins and giggles and we made it home with her smile and her outfit still intact. She went down early after dinner without a whimper and I sank into the couch with my mint chocolate chip ice cream feeling very content. It had been a very good day. The inscription on my mother's day card had said all the wonderful things I had hoped for, all the things I had aspired too. Maybe I didn't get it right every day but I was getting it right often enough for the two most important people in my life to notice. Sometimes, I just want to know someone notices. It is not an easy job, being a mother, but there isn't anything that's as rewarding. Every sleepless moment is replaced by other waking moments full of joy and wonderment. Every tearful breakdown is outweighed by the laughter and delight of watching our beautiful daughter bloom and grow.