Vertago

Odd Ball Childhood

          It's strange, but I've always had the feeling I knew something important.
  I guess that's narcissism. Take a moment and try to remember a time when
  you weren't thinking. On a summer day I could focus on nothing, but the bird's
  song and the breeze . . It was all about me. Life. Tree climbing was a big event.
  The trees were maple and sycamore. Pine was too sticky. Oh, maybe a pine tree
  was crossed over in the canopy of branches. I had a my first high fall from a tree.
  I broke my fall on the branches and had the wind knocked out of me. The thought
  of death did not seem possible.

        Mom told me to thank the tree for not letting me fall too hard. She had washed
  out my scratches. At the time it didn't sound ridiculous. I walked up to the maple and
  thanked it, then I slapped it's trunk. It felt good. Brad a neighbors child asked me
  what I was doing. I explained matter of factly. Brad thought I was nuts. His parents
  were humanists and he said he was an atheist. Okay, we had a debate. Followed
  by wrestling. Brad was younger and I pinned him. It felt good. Brad refused to
  concede. But, I let him up. So, what does it all mean?

        Well, I would walk through the house with a hand held mirror.
  Not to admire myself, but to see if the ceiling was over my head. I was suspicious.
  I even made a chalk x under my bed and checked on it. I had this idea that the
  whole house was an illusion. I was being tricked into thinking it was real. Every door
  in this old creaking house had a skeleton key lock, except the bathroom.
  For some reason this door had a deadbolt also. Was this so no one could use a
  skeleton key to unlock it? I liked the bathroom. I felt safe in there. But, there was a
  vanity sconce in the bathroom. It indented to three mirrors. This is where I found
  transcendental meditation after a hot bath in the standing iron tub.

        I stepped out of the tub and beheld my nakedness in the three mirrors.
        There was a round shaggy mat in front of the tub. Then, I crossed red and white
        tile to the indented three way mirrors. I introduced myself as I had to the maple tree.
        I sensed a presence. It was very erotic.

  A long closet was the next door to the bathroom. It shared the wall with the mirrors.
  The closet was L shaped and ran a length along the back wall of my bed room.
  On one inspection of the closet, I spotted a crack of light where the mirrors were.
  I could see into the bathroom through this crack in the joining of the mirrors.
  This closet was also connected to my bedroom. I had a naughty opportunity.
  In a few days I had seen everyone in my family use the bathroom. It was funny
  and erotic. Until, I reasoned that someone could be watching me.

    After a few days, I noticed the crack between the mirrors had been caulked.
  A hard knock came at the bathroom door, while I was enjoying a hot tub.
  Dad said he needed to use the toilet. I unlatched the dead bolt. He did a long
  stream into the toilet as I slipped on my shorts. Then, he asked me if I had
  enjoyed my bath. I of course did. Then, he added, "Did you like my caulking?"
  I felt my guilt was unraveling. I nodded. He smiled and shut the door behind him.
  How quickly I had lost my sense of importance. But, I had fun.

 
  ~~~
    <^>