A daily walk with... ME |
I learned something interesting about grief and mourning. There is a kind of solace and comfort in the sadness. It's a place to go where time stands still and everyday, mundane duties are of no concern. Your movements seem to be in slow-motion, as if you are plodding through mud. It's a quiet place where others' words are unheard; only your own thoughts are acknowledged. And it's a dangerous place, for, in that timeless, private world, there is a voice which echos, "Stay here. Don't laugh. Don't smile. Don't love again. Don't move on to live your life anew. For in doing so, you will betray your loved-one's passing." It's a tempting voice. You begin to agree that it is your duty to stay in that dark, quiet, lonely, comfortable place. To laugh again would be a kind of blasphemy. I've also learned that you cannot listen to that voice, nor can you stay in that place. For doing so would seal your own death, a death to the life around you. And this would, truly, be a betrayal of your beloved's investment in their love for you. Until you meet again, draw from that investment bequeathed to you. Emerge from that secure place of sorrow and look up at the sky and breathe again, laugh again, love again. In doing so, you will honor their gift to you. |