La Bene Vita

Thursday

Ahh... tomorrow is Friday, my day off. Except I have to go to the grocery store and watch the kids and deal with the puppy and do laundry and perform at a wedding. But other than that, it's my day off. *deep breath*

I am {e:determined} to participate in "October Novel Prep Challenge"  [13+] this year. I've been brainstorming about the premise in my 750 Words   postings, because I've always felt that it's a bit weak and unbelievable (title: Andromeda Sings), but I decided that it would work exceptionally well as a YA novel - not because YA are more gullible, but just because I think this premise speaks to teens in particular.

I'm toying with that.

I *am* supposed to write two Textbroker articles on Fridays, and I *did* plan on working on a submission for Seisa-sleepingcatbooks.com 's anthology, The Storm is Coming  , before the end of the month, before I get tied up with Prep in Oct and NaNo in Nov. I'm so exhausted right now, I have a hard time picturing myself actually accomplishing those things tomorrow.

In typical efficient Michelle fashion, I did consider combining my anthology submission and my NaNo project. Perhaps one of my backstories will involve an approaching storm.

Reach 275 students at MTMS   by 12/31/11.
Around 215ish.

Writing:
(1) Blog at MT.com   by the end of Wednesday: Yes!
(2) 30 minutes of daily freestyle writing: Actually, 750 Words reports that I completed my entry in 26 minutes. But I'm sure this blog post took at least 4.

Count points:
No.

I'm not sure how I feel about my goals. I've always had better long- and short-term goals on the list and felt like I was accomplishing more. It's probably just a lack of documentation - I'm too busy accomplishing things to blog about them. My P&L (Profit & Loss report) at the music school shows accomplishment. I'm in contract on my house, so that's good. Overall, I've been working toward financial health from a job I love, and I'm getting closer all the time.

I'm just not sure what my writing goals are or why I even bother to have them.

Isn't this strange? I quit my job... opened my own business... achieved independent success as a business owner... found success as a freelance writer, whenever I want the money... picked up responsibilities (and salary) at my church thanks to my obvious competence at my current responsibilities... basically get to do all the things I love and make a living at it...

...and now, I don't know what to do with myself.

I'm not bored. I'm just... dissatisfied. Because I'm no longer driven.

This has always been my problem. It's why I left my job at Abbott. I never hated my job as an engineer. I would even say I still liked it when I left. I was just done with it, and this yard looked greener, so I moved. Now my yard is starting to see some dry patches, and I have no yard next door.

Maybe I need a therapist. I should be happy in my own yard. And if patches are dry, I should be watering and fertilizing.