Mercy! Mercy! That Dang Nabed PERCY!

Pointers

Pointers

Today I have to go to the Veterans Administration VA) and explain what happened to my hearing aids. I think Honey ate one and where the other went is a mystery. I have a theory as to why things disappear… that the “Hide-a-Behind” gets it. The Hide-a-Behind is an imaginary creature that follows me about but whenever I look back to catch a glimpse, she quick Hide-a-Behinds something. As I grow older and become more and more aware of his presence I have more opportunities to try and catch him. Alas, to this point I have been unsuccessful. Anyway I am psyching myself up to take the ass chewing the service matron is sure to administer.

As I write my blog my wife Linda is in and out of the room reminding me of the time and how we have to go and that we are going to be late. Plus she has a list of people I need to talk to regarding the water in the basement fiasco. I have ten minutes. She just warned me to get out of bed, take a shower and make the necessary calls. I work well under pressure, having done it most of my life and don’t mind her constant distractions and getting on my case. After all there is plenty about my case that needs getting on.

Today I posted the lesson on dialogues. There is so much that could be written on this subject that I don’t really know where to start. I guess you have to begin where a new writer begins….Trying to emulate conversation in their manuscript. Newer writers tend to write their characters all in the same voice and that voice is generally similar to theirs. I did a critique early on here at WDC where I told a long time member that her black character didn’t sound very “ethnic.“ Boy! Did that bring down a firestorm. Actually I had toned it down from…. Your “brother” sounds like a middle class white, spray painted black.” Fortunately I didn’t use those words .

I am a fan of Janet Evanovitch and she does dialogue as well as anyone these days. Her Palestinian characters are so good and true to form that they really crack me up. She already has me in stitches for most of her novels but I thought the Palestinians were classic. Listening to them suggested that she is very familiar with their speech patters, the result of careful listening to the how they speak English.

The flip side to ethnicity is going off the deep end. That is getting so wound up in the phonetics, that the words are almost undecipherable. A reader and a listener want to first grasp what the character is saying. If the syrup is ladled on too thick it breaks the continuity of the read and requires the reader to go back and take a second or third look. In a stage play this is not really necessary as the actors and directors understand ethnic dialects and are usually good at casting those who can make it believable. You don’t really need to articulate to a Hispanic actor how a Hispanic character sounds. All they really need to know is that the character is Hispanic and the context of the conversation, although an occasional word is OK for a little reminder.

The Next thing I note in a student are lines of dialogue that contain two or more thoughts or ideas. I like to use a rule of thumb of one idea per line. For example I would not say…

“George works for Barclay’s and I think he‘s gay.”

but rather

“George is gay.”

“What makes you say that?”

“Straight guys come on to me…”

“And he doesn’t?”

“Yesterday we were talking on the Exchange…”

“Yeah…”

“I was giving him some “pointers,” you know, chest to chest?“

"I've see you in action."

"I even brused up against him."

“That should have gotten a rise…”

“He never even picked up on it.”

This also illustrates "showing" instead of "telling." I have more to say about dialogue but think I’ll save it for tomorrow.