The Ambivalent Spoon

Chinese Year of the Dragon

Chinese New Year festivities began on the 23rd January 2012, and will continue for fifteen days until 6th February. They culminate in the Lantern Festival on the fifteenth day, in which lanterns and candles are lit to guide wayward spirits home and the Dragon Dance is performed to bring good fortune and prosperity for the new year. Spring Festival is an exciting time here in China with many decorations and events happening around the town. Most people return to their home towns for traditional family celebrations. Travel is crazy, with so many people making their way to different parts of the country. The thing I was least prepared for though, is the fireworks. For fifteen days or more, people set off fireworks CONSTANTLY. They fire them out of windows, off balconies, and give them to small children to play with unsupervised. On New Years Eve the city sounded like a war-zone, with non-stop explosions from midnight, right through the night, and well into the next day! The fireworks here do not seem to be designed to be pretty, so much as to be loud. The firecrackers are deafening! A good night's sleep is not an option without earplugs.

With CNY in full swing around me, I've written a fake news article detailing a strange event that may, or may not, occur on the fifteenth day of celebrations in the town where I live.

2012: The True Year of the Dragon
Yesterday's New Year celebrations in Yuhuan, China were thrown into chaos when a real live dragon blundered into their midst.

As crowds gathered on the beach to watch the traditional dragon dance festival, marking the fifteenth and final day of New Year celebrations in Yuhuan, they little realised the spectacle they were about to witness. The festivities were due to culminate in a display of powerful fireworks, set off from a small rocky island situated around 500 meters out into the bay. As the fireworks exploded into the sky, witnesses report hearing a deafening shriek and seeing the rocks upon the island begin to shake and shatter. Moments later a huge, red, dragon surfaced and swam towards the awed spectators on the beach. The dragon reportedly blundered in a confused fashion amongst the crowd, before streaming away over the rocky cliffs at the end of the beach, and back into the ocean. A helicopter was immediately deployed to circle the area, but no further signs of the dragon have yet been discovered.

The dragon is estimated to have been over 20 ft. in length and standing taller than 11 ft. at its head. Photos snapped by the revellers at the beach show it to be covered in red scales, have a whiskery, golden mane and sharp pointed horns. Onlookers were thrown into confusion at the appearence of this magnificent beast, unsure whether it was a spectacular special effect commissioned by the local council for the festival. Many ran from the scene fearing for theirs lives, yet others stayed on the beach filming and taking pictures, convinced that this was part of the show. Only when the dragon surged onto the beach amongst them did the majority of the crowd break and run. No injuries were sustained in the dragon's rampage, but seventeen people were admitted to hospital having been injured in the crush to get to safety. All casualties are said to be in a stable condition.

Opinions differ as to the significance of this amazing appearance and the impact it will have. Local businessman Mr. Bao stated,
"This is surely a great omen of fortune and prosperity for our town. Many travellers will come and want to seeing the dragon, and this will provide a great boost for businesses in our community."
Whilst Ms. Chen, mother of two, commented,
"It is terrible, I am very scared. My children were crying and I must fight for them to be not crushed. How can we feel safe, these days?"

Professor Ling from the University of Hangzhou claims that experts have long harboured hopes of finding evidence that dragons existed, though none thought to discover a living specimen. The dragon seen in Yuhuan is thought to be Panlong, literally 'coiled dragon,' a species said to live in deep water and lakes. Professor Ling places its age somewhere between 1500 and 2000 years, due to both its size and its horns. Dragons live long lives, beginning as a water snake and not reaching the classification of dragon until they have already lived for five hundred years. It is written that they do not achieve status of horned dragon until they have lived for fifteen hundred years or more. Dragons pass much of their lives in a state akin to hibernation in mammals. It is thought that they can remain in a dormant state for a century or longer, whilst they are growing. Professor Ling speculates that the Yuhuan dragon is likely to have slumbered in an underwater cavern discovered in the base of the rocky island, since before the town of Yuhuan was founded. It is likely that the beast was due to awake from his hibernation period and his waking was hastened by the powerful explosions of the fireworks. This would explain the dragons confused and blundering demeanour. Professor Ling warns that the dragon could be very dangerous, despite the noble dispositions given to dragons in myth and literature.

A full scale search has been mounted by the military to find and capture the dragon. Animal rights activists, scholars and scientists have all issued pleas that the dragon be taken alive, as it may be the sole surviving member of its species. Military personnel refused to comment on the tactics they intend to use to capture the dragon. Scientists hope to contain the dragon in a secure area and make a detailed study its anatomy, diet and living habits. Some hope that the understanding of these majestic creatures gained through study will lead us to discover other living dragons. There is speculation that all dragons enter a dormant state around the same time, depending on conditions in the world at large. If one dragon was ready to wake from its slumber, this could be a sign that conditions are apt for a return of dragons on a grand scale.  The cave in which the dragon was thought to have been hibernating has been sealed for inspection by specialised diving crews.

People are advised not to take walks in isolated coastal regions, or sail small crafts in the area until the dragon has been found. Remain indoors as much as possible. Please remain vigilant at all times and if notice anything that could be a sign of the dragons whereabouts, notify the authorities immediately. Do not attempt to hunt the dragon yourself. Dragons are known to have a solitary disposition, so are likely to feel threatened and attack if approached. In case of an encounter with the dragon, experts advise against making eye contact. Lower your gaze to signify submission and back away slowly. At all costs, do not turn and run.