Who Do I Think I Am??

This one's about getting caught in the act.

THE PROMPT: "Invalid Entry" 

What's up y'all? I'm going with blainecindy's entry for the prompt 'cuz I don't remember seeing anything else about who was "leading" today's episode of the "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS" . Of course, I had dinner about a half an hour ago and I don't remember that either.

Wow, so many ways to go. And only so many ways that won't shoot my blog's rating up to XXX.

Ok. I got one. And I can talk about it now 'cuz it's more stupid than anything.

We caught justjessica1's youngest son sneaking out of the house about a week and a half ago. I shouldn't say we caught him as much as he incriminated himself. Now, I swear up and down that her kids are good kids (as easily as they piss me off sometimes), but this is way out of character.

He's 16. He said it was because his friend was distraught over not hanging out much recently. He did it because he knew if he would've asked, Jess would've said no. Because sleepovers on a school night that start at 1am aren't ridiculous or shady or anything.

So the kid climbs out his window and runs a few blocks over to his friend's house, as the story goes. Here's the kicker, mind you: We were still up and awake and doing things in the house at the time. I was in the basement, while Jess was in the freakin' living room, for chrissakes. We could've been on the porch having a smoke, or she could've been looking right out of the large window she was seated next to while watching tv. He could've been nailed on the spot!!

But no. The next morning, Jess woke up for work and noticed her boy's bedroom door was shut, which was unlike him, as it's usually cracked open at least. He came home the day before and slept for awhile because he wasn't feeling good, got up for dinner, and laid back down. As a concerned parent, she knocked on his door to make sure he was ok and didn't oversleep. She got nothin'. She tried the handle on his door, and again, nothin', but we knew there was a problem with his doorknob. Finally, she got the knob to turn, but the door itself wouldn't budge.

She was finally able to get the door open enough to stick her head in. The boy had barracaded the door neatly with piles of folded laundry. There was no boy in the bed. The room was cold. The curtain was closed, and the screen was laying against the wall under the window. A bit of relief set in, but common sense hadn't.

Jess decided to call the boy, and he answered his phone. "Where are you?" she asked, half freaked and half annoyed. "At school, mom" he said. But how did he get there? The side door was still dead-bolted, and he doesn't lock the deadbolt on his way out, plus the garage door wasn't opened. She still wasn't putting two and two together.

He said he left early to go to his friend's house first. Jess was confused...why would he go out his window? Then she did the gradual "Ohhhh....myyyyyyy....gawwwwwd", "Now I get it" thing that people do when they finally realize what's happening. "You snuch out last night, didn't you?" she exclaimed, and he copped right up to it. Long story short, the kid's grounded indefinitely. No phone, and internet use only for school work (as best as we can police it).

But the story doesn't end there, friends. The next night...the next freakin' night, we hear noises outside. I went to bed because I was beat. It was around 1am. Jess heard these noises for about twenty minutes. She walked by her boy's room, and his door again was shut. But this time, his alarm was going off. At 1am? On a school night? So she went into the room and there he was, out like a freakin' light, snorin' and all.

But she kept hearing these noises, so finally she went out front. She crept around the side of the house, where she saw a figure in the darkness. It was the kid's girlfriend, trying to get his attention! She claimed she didn't sneak out, and since she couldn't talk to the boy outside of school, she was worried about him because of something that happened in a class with a teacher or something. So Jess let the girl in, woke the boy up, and gave them both a polite talking-to about how she "needs the truth" and "this shit needs to stop".

The moral to this story is, look, I get it. Teenage kids do teenage things. I certainly had my share of fuck-ups, but I never had to sneak out of the house. Jess even told the kid, after he swore all he did was spend the night at his friend's, "That's all you did? If you're gonna sneak outta the house, at least do it for a good reason. Like a crazy party or something, ya know? Something I forbid you from doing. See? This is why you got caught. You're a good kid, and good kids don't know how to pull this shit and not get caught. The bad kids? They're bad because they know how not to get caught!" Go on 'head and use that for parenting advice, if ya ever need to.

Who really got caught in the act? Us. Me in the basement away from where his room would be, and Jess, unassuming and such. And for a few days, that's all I heard about. From her and both the kids. And people wonder why I set up shop in the basement, right near the fridge where the beer lives.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

It may take me a few days to get this out of my system. I don't use Twitter that much but I tweeted that I was watching something I DVR'd last night. This was from it:

And this may pertain more to the crux of the entry, in a troublemaking kind of way...the cultural references were never lost on me, unlike a lot of people who didn't "get the joke". Yet another notch in their belt of legendariousness (a word I just made up).

VITAL STATS:

Cinco De Mayo! No Coronas were harmed during this entry.

Slowest moving day ever. No, wait, they all have been lately. But today was pretty bad.

And I'm out, playas. Gonna see what you've been up to and then sleep all freakin' day tomorrow. Can't find my Beastie Boys concert dvd, "Awesome, I F***in' Shot That!", or their video collection, which means we have too many dvds. So I'mma YouTube myself to sleep tonight. Peace, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!