Drop by drop the snow pack dies, watering the arid lands below. |
In Las Vegas, Nevada, it's still November 2012, but on writing.com and the East coast it's December 2012. My mother died on November 28, 2012; at least, I think it was November 28. For the past few days I've been in a fog, I have to continue living without my mother in my life and I don't know what to do. I was born on December 24, 1946 at 11 minutes before midnight. This year will be my first year without my mother. I have to celebrate my birthday without Mom. I don't know what I'm going to do on my birthday. Mom and I always went out to eat on my birthday. That tradition stopped about a year or so ago when it become difficult for Mom to get out in public. When we stopped going out to eat, we would have pie and ice cream or cake and ice cream at home. I don't want to stay home for my birthday this year, but I don't know what I want to do on that day. I will turn 66 years old without my mother being here to celebrate it with me. How do I celebrate my birthday without my mother? My mother has been with me on my birthday since the day I was born. I'm at a loss as to what to do. I know I want to go out because I don't think I could stay home on my birthday without Mom being in the house to share it with me. The question is "Do I go to the restaurant we always went to on our birthdays or do I find a new restaurant?" I'm not sure what I'm going to do without my mother. I know I will survive, but I don't know how at this time. I think I'm afraid to face life without my mother. I'll be 66 years old and I'm afraid to face life without my mother. I know that sounds strange, but that's how I feel right now. |