Shadow Puppet Storyteller

Give and Take

When your career environment begins feeling less like being part of a tribe, you hear people around you speaking in catchphrases, "corporate this and corporate that," and everyone's head is down; it's time to introduce collaboration at all levels, quick, before it all dries to dust. I find that's true at home too. It gets hard to feel like the family you were when the kids were little. As teens and adults, the kids either stop talking to you about most things (I think, things it would be fun to talk about) because they think they know all your opinions on topics. Well, really, the healthy part of that is they are seeking opinions outside of yours, and that's OK. (Their peers may not be as well informed, but that's part of learning [the good use of the word] -- discrimination.

But then there's this tricky substitution trend in this same area. I know, I lived it, and I probably am still living it. You can seek out other opinions as an emerging adult, but it is easy to substitute "same for same," just the act of seeking it makes it feel like you're opening to something new, but if you tend to be shy and like safe, you end up with same. It is not as simplistic as the cultural warning that a woman "marries her father," but that sense is a part of it of what helps you to recognize it.

Someone who's been lonely, but isn't really conscious of it, can easily glom onto one friend and put that friend above others, or even just stick to having that one friend. It progresses, if left at a pivotal point like when high school ends, even if fully capable of exploring the adult world, one may just continue with the attachment of one-to-one.

Not where I thought this entry was going this morning. Having titled it "Give and Take" I was thinking more about things I have been giving away and seeing what has come into my possession in return. Also was waiting to figure what to wear to work today. Then this deeper stuff came out, and I do know why. There's so much more I can write about this, really just the tip of an enormous iceberg right now, and I really need to get back to the wheel and steer around this if I can.