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April Fools Rush In: Blame it on the spring pollen. 1744 wds

~~~~Short version (861 words):

STATIC

April Fools Rush In  (18+) Mart is in for the time of his life. Whether that's a good thing remains to be seen. WQ108 #1987363 by A*Monaing*Faith

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Martin turned the key in the lock and paused. What the hell was he doing!? This was crazy. Wasn't this crazy? He knew his buddies would literally kill him to be in his position, but this didn't feel right. Fine time to have second guesses. He thought to himself. Idiot, she heard you turn unlock the door, might as well follow through. He took one last deep breath for courage and blew out the remnants of his hesitation.

The foyer to her apartment was tasteful. The lighting was dim but it wasn't dark. He could easily take in the extravegent decour. The floor was a dark marble with silver accents. Straight ahead was a sleek matching marble welcoming table complete with a small area for keys and a calming miniature water fountain. The fountain showcased a stone mermaid that surprisingly looked a lot like his hostess. Martin shook his head. He was seeing the women in everything lately, even her own furniture.

He hung his jacket on the nearby coat hanger. Even the hanger, made of a sturdy dark oak, matched the dark decor, was she an interior designer on the side? If so maybe he could hire her to decorate his new place and they could spend even more time together. Maybe I should get threw tonight before I plan our future together. He thought to himself sardonically.

Deciding not to waste any more time fawning over the woman's decorative abilities, Martin made a brisk beeline for the bedroom. Without even thinking he swung the door open with much bravado and confidence! Her toilet stared back at him. Damnit! I suck at this. Maybe I should use it so she thinks I did this on purpose. Come to think of it I should leak my lemons. Having to run back here in the middle of it would not be sexy. He went in and quickly did his business but hesitated before zipping. Maybe I should just walk in naked. No that's stupid, but it could be sexy....I'll just loosen up my tie.

There were only two options left. The door to the left was already open and was obviously her office space. Looks like Door Number 2 Monty.

Unfortunately he could not make himself enter with as much confidence as the bathroom excursion. Slowly opening the door revealed a tasteful room with oak furniture and cheery red accents. This place was made with sex in mind. Barely a heart beat passed before her sultry voice captured his ears.

"Bout time you made it my way." Coming from an ordinary girl the statement would have sounded catty. Coming from Cassandra, it sounded inviting.

Martin put on his best tough guy smirk. "Well you know me, always busy pleasing the ladies." What? What does that even mean?! Now she's gonna think I've been with another woman! Maybe girls like that.... Silence reigned. Was she mad? He had said the wrong thing he just knew it. There was no such thing as companionable silence in situations like this. Women like Cassandra didn't want companions that wanted men. Tough men that got the job done. He rushed on to prove his manliness. "So little girl, you lookin' to get naughty." She laughed. From any other chick it would have been a snort of derision, but not his Cassie. No Cassandra wanted him and only him. She could have anyone she wanted, but she chose him.

Cassandra had been lounging on her massive California King bed, dressed in nothing but a short satin robe. Now she slid down to the plush carpet in the most graceful move Martin had seen since Becky had dragged him to the ballet. He hadn't even got sex after that mess. Cassandra was the only ballet he needed.

She sashayed over to where he stood. Why hadn't he walked to her? He should have jumped on the bed as soon as he walked in. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

"Enough talk." She cooed before claiming his lips with her own. She tasted so sweet, so wet, so right. Martin lost himself in the scent of her. His hands went crazy and went from the small of her back straight to her ass. Was that too quick? I guess not she hasn't moved them yet. Wow her butt is firm!

Somehow they made it to the bed. Cassandra undressed him with expertise. Only his Cassie could turn getting undressed into foreplay. Before he knew it he was on the bed on top of her with only the satin of her robe between them. "Your turn." He went to untie the belt of her robe but she stopped him.

"Not yet. What's the rush? We have all night and foreplay is only a third of the fun." Martin figured sex was another third but what was the final third? Cuddling? He could do that. Actually he loved doing that. His friends said it was one of the things that made him soft. Apparently no self respecting straight man liked to cuddle. Yea well now I'm here and where are they? At home jerking off. The thought made him smile as he trailed lingering kisses down her neck. He was just about to reach the swell of her left breast when suddenly she wasn't there anymore.

"Where ya goin?" He asked and attempted to get up before realizing he was tied to her headboard. How the hell how he not realized she was tying his wrists to the board?! He had felt the material but just assumed she was playing with him. You know, heightening the senses. There's no way she should have been able to make such a strong knot. But he held fast. Panic started to rise in him.

"Sssshhh, relax babe. She straddled him from behind and started kissing and caressing his face, then his back, his sides and by the time she reached the valley of his gluts he had forgotten all about the momentary distraction. Not caring what she was up to anymore Martin didn't even resist when she tied his ankles to the posts at the foot of the huge canopy bed. "Can I blindfold you?" Her voice was so sweet and the way she pouted was so damned cute.

"Umm, I guess, but only for a bit. Then I get to blindfold you!"

"Deal." That smile. Dear God he would kill for that smile. Once he was submerged into full darkness a bunch of things started to happen. He heard a door open to his left and another door opened on his right. No way she was that fast. "Ummm, what's that noise?"

"O I invited a few friends in to help me." Martin stiffened.

"What?! Help you what?! Are they girl friends of yours? Cuz I'm not sure I'm down with that. Least not before I see them you know what I mean?" He tried to chuckle while saying the last bit but it was obvious he was freaked out.

"Don't worry baby." Cassy's voice was moist in his ear. "Don't you trust me?"

"Well yea but..." Suddenly he heard a sound like heavy wood being moved and then the ties around his ankles went slack. He instinctually raised to his knees but before he could try and work the blind fold off strong hands grasped each of his thighs and fastened cuffs around them. Before he could say "What the hell?' His legs were spread and his wrist restraints were jerked down and further out of reach. He was in the perfect downward dog position: face down, ass up. Quite fitting since he felt like a real bitch. Breathing heavy he took a moment to gather his senses. He didn't want the next words out of his mouth to sound hysterical. "Cassandra, what the frick? Let me go, now!" He thought he sounded commanding, but the chick the laughed at him.

"Too late boy toy. You're mine." Just then the blindfold was ripped from his head. He was greeted to the sight of a huge, hair, and naked man standing on the side of the bed. Before Martin could start screaming at the bitch that this wasn't funny he noticed the guy didn't have a dick. What? That's not right. He stared harder, fixating on the mans groin. Something he never thought he'd do to a man but needs must. Fact is there was no dick where a dick should be. Just nice smooth skin. Ok seriously, what--the---frick!?!!?

"What the hell!?! Are you a eudick!?" Girlish laughter filled the room. He tried to turn his head to stare down the murderous bitch that had done this too him but she was out of sight.

"Sweetheart I think you mean eunich. And yes, Tommy's a eunuch, Dave's a eunuch, and so are Mark, Mason, and Andy."

"What? Bitch you are freaking crazy. I don't know who the hell Tommy and Dave are but my friends are not eunuchs!"

"No? Have you seen there dicks lately?"

"I'm not playing with you, let me go so I can kick your buddy's ass. Just be glad I don't hit women." Cassandra chuckled. Coming from another girl it would have sounded sweet and amused. From her it was just flipping annoying.

"O Martin Martin Martin. I suggest you be nice and do as I tell you because I have no problem with adding you to the Dickies. That's what I call my eunnies: Dickies. Get it?" Martin ground his teeth but didn't say anything. He would not play her sick perverted game. "I don't think he believes me you guys. Go show him." Eunuch man moved away and made room for another guy. Martin looked up into Mark's face.

"Dude! What the frick, seriously!? Get me out of ---" Martin's words cut off when he looked at Marks groin. "Dude...no....how, what the---Did she do that to you?! Dude we can sue, get me out of here!" Marks face was blank, devoid of all emotion. He walked away. Before Martin could scream for him to come back Mason and Andy came forward and displayed their own mutilated groins. None of them were as smooth as Eunuch 1. It was obvious that the surgery had taken place recently. Cassandra moved into his view next. She sported an average sized strap on.

"You see baby? Don't you think it's best not to fight me on this one?" All Martin could do was scream.


Word count: 1744