Who do I still think I am??

This one's about bewaring the ides of June.

30DBC PROMPT: "Do you think playing violent video games and watching violent movies makes people more violent in real life? Were you allowed to partake in these activities as a child? If you have children, did/do you let them have violent media?", courtesy of Charlie ~ .

Good afternoon folks...it's been a busy morning for me but I'm home for the rest of the day, hopefully to relax and kick a few words witchya, so let's see how this plays out.

Honestly, the last quote-unquote violent video game I played with any regularity was NHL '96 for the Sega Genesis, and I think by then they'd already outlawed fighting and showing blood when an injured player fell was laid out by a hit and vibrated in a seizure-like position on the ice. I don't feel like doing the research right now about when these facets were taken out of the video game, but they're immortalized in Hollywood's legacy via Vince Vaughn, Jon Favreau, Ron Livingston, and some pansy in a white L.A. Kings jersey   (and not the sharper, more thuggish-looking black one...so dude probably had it comin' anyway).

I played that game with my buddies, who were, like me, in their mid-twenties by then, and also with my youngest brother, who came along 14 years after me. And ya know what? None of us went out later in street hockey or rec league games and wanted to hit someone so hard they were laying on the street at the corner of Gould and Kokomo, or waiting to be shipped out of the YMCA on an ambulance. Granted, Swingers   was a little out of our reach as far as comparisons to Buffalo bars and clubs we'd attend on weekends, and the violence in EA Sports' franchise games never quite mimicked the reality of actual games they simulated anyway (which even kid brother Bro Mike could figure out before turning nine years old).

But that's just me and my little group of people. A small percentage of a smaller percentage of demographics. For every putz playing video games instead of doing cool shit, like, I don't know, entertaining loose women, there is a subset of certain types of people who think that because you could control a maniac driver going on a Tony Montana-esque binge during Grand Theft Auto, it's ok to pay no mind when smackin' up a prostitute. And I have to admit, as the video game industry got more realistic and life-like, the possibilities do seem more influential. Back when I was of an impressionable age, the most hardcore game we had for Atari was Combat  , which hardly inspired many kids of my generation I'm sure to want to drive tanks.

Video games are more like interactive movies now, in a way (if not really a way). And there's a lot more violence in them that has gradually become acceptable in society along with PC's and more complex gaming systems. Along with generational rebellion associated with kids growing up without easy access to violent movies or parents more willing to restrict their children's activities regarding TV, computer use, and gameplay, I think there are countless other diversions now for kids to get caught up in as an escape from reality...but I'm hesitant to lay blame solely on movies, video games, music, or any other form of entertainment that exists with an enhanced wide-scale presence. It boils down to values, and what you think is appropriate for your children. The basics of right from wrong, and the line between absurdism and reality. Unless you talk to your kids and know what they're getting into, or you're content with them plopping themselves down in front of Call Of Duty for four hours a night, you don't deserve the right to complain about how boo-hoo violent the world is and how a company could issue a movie/game/program and not expect kids to gain some kind of influence from that.

Look, you can't police the world from putting out materials that might be considered objectionable. That's happened in society since the dawn of the written word; creative people tend to push boundaries, because they have a stake in their art being accepted and acceptable. Parents have a responsibility to raise their kids how they see fit, and that includes actually being a part of their kids' lives. Sometimes you have to make hard choices or take on the task of explaining things so they'll have a better understanding, instead of expecting the internet or television to babysit your kids while you unwind from a hard day at work. And that's where society dropped the ball...as families became more reliant on bigger and better things, there was a price tag attached. And as that price tag got bigger (once more parents got on board with the idea what they "had to provide more for our kids than we had"), you saw dads taking second jobs or moms being out of the house for longer periods of time, and the easy out was just to leave kids to their own devices because there just weren't enough hours in the day for successful or even competent parenting. And the easiest way to make kids happy is to give them what they want, as long as it gives the parent a little peace as well and a few minutes of rest. Basic supply/demand, really. Until someone shoots up a school or a mall or a movie theater, and the armchair activists come out with their own guns ablazin' with theories and want to blame everything on the entertainment industry but have no freaking clue about the actual in-house situation of the person at the helm of said disaster. And the parents who say "We did all we could!"? Naw man. No. I don't buy that if "doing all we could" is pacifying your kids with all the toys your parents were smart enough not to let you have and them some, just because your lives are more important than actually being a family unit and talking- not texting, but talking- to one another regularly.

Kids don't necessarily need to be on the same page as the parents (as far as mommy and daddy's day-to-day realities), but parents need to be overseeing the life book their kids are starting to author.

BCF PROMPT: "If March winds bring April showers and April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring in June?"

Well, it ain't pilgrims anymore y'all. That's for damn sure.

I know probably 84-87.6% of respondents to this prompt will likely say Junebugs, but that's not a scientific nor calculated guess...it's the first thing that comes to mind. The realist answer isn't June Lockhart, June Cleaver, or that girl from the movie Juno  . It's mawfuggin' June Bugs.

And I don't need to stand on my front stoop of the building I live in for you to know that you know, they're a damn problem. To my knowledge, ain't nothin' good or nice or lady-ish about them. They're just pissed that you're involved in their light during the evening time, say, when you're outside on the porch with the light on, havin' a smoke. They have no concern about what part of your face they'll fly into. They're nature's ultimate IDGAF, uhhh, thing (for not knowing how else to put it). They're cool with wanting to use your eyebrows as a dance floor complete with your mirrorball glasses, hanging out on the screen of the door for a few minutes wondering why you left them, and then dying on the porch in a totally selfish display of absolute defiance regarding how you rejected their initial come-ons.

You've probably been there. I don't need to go there ever again, because I typically tend to try to fight them as soon as they're all up in my grill. No one creature on this planet needs to get within arms' reach of me (unless I'm actually allowing it). Plain and simple. I have boundaries. Strict boundaries. And if you're gonna Junebug in my face, I'mma drop the mic and walk away and not think twice about your clandom (or whatever it is groups of 'em are called...and please don't tell me if you know, 'cuz I'm not terribly interested) mourning your loss over our fallout in the morning, because I know they won't have the sac to. And I won't lie; I'mma do it again if your crew of june buggers keeps up at it. They'll know for a year or two to step off of me. And by then, I'll be gone in a clockwise direction. Jerks. That's what they are...straight up jerks.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

There are women who might find this romantic. They're sure to be the ones who'll press charges once you attempt to do this. Or bitch about the mutual teeth loss.

THE DAILY BOX SCORE:

I'm, ummm, having health issues again. Good news: I'm being taken off Ambien. Bad news: I'm being put on something else for sleep but I won't be able to pick it up for a few weeks. Badder news: I need to make an appointment with my PCP because I might have allergies and/or sleep apnea. But my PCP kinda sucks, and I'm limited on insurance and providers who are trustworthy in my local area. I need to make a choice soon about whether I wanna live with feeling like I'm choking before I go to sleep because my nose and sinuses feel absolutely constricted to the point it's causing my gag reflexes to engage, and then waking up at 4am and not getting a fitful night of sleep because that's not an easy time to try and go back to sleep (because it's then that I'm entirely susceptible to nightmares, dreams I want to try to control but can't, and overall restlessness), or taking something stronger than Ambien that will stay in my system longer but could cause prolonged morning drowsiness. Can't win for being sleepy and wanting to sleep but can't, yet can't feel functional when sleep isn't an option. The whole "can't breathe" thing is kinda scary too, but it may be allergies...my MH doc is cool like that in telling me he takes a lot of stuff for his, and yeah, we kicked it again in his office today for awhile (he's so much more approachable than my therapist), but he also doesn't want to pile on the meds. And I don't want to be piled on with meds. But if these are the least of my worries, I guess I'd be doing ok. And that's all I have to say about that.

Last PT appointment tomorrow, and then I need to figure out if I can go back to work again before my ortho on Monday wants to clear me. I don't know, because I'm not in the field, and I'm bored a lot not doing anything so it'd be nice to get out and make some extra money, but the organization I'm working for wants me to be 100%, and I can't guarantee that, but if a doctor tells me to "just keep pushing through", while PT says "it's hard for us to work with you when you're shot once you walk in", well, then what? It's not like my job is physically taxing, but, well, fuck. It's so confusing and conflicting and I'm hungry, so I should probably eat something and think more about it when I've got a full belly.

Oh hell, I can't go without mentioning this. This happened recently in the town I grew up in- a first-ring suburb of Buffalo- and this   still happens? And don't get me wrong; I don't think this doesn't still happen everywhere in America. It does. I'm not sure what I feel sadder for...that she went full-blown trashy mom in front of her kids, dropping eff-bombs and n-words all over the place while she told the guy in the car she knew where her kids were as they were using the crash poles in front of the store as a gymnasium and cared more about where her coffee was, or that she actually screamingly said to her husband on the phone, "Do you know how many cops I've stripped for?". I get it, Dude started his car, his music was too loud, and it startled one of her kids. Since when did that become a license for someone to spout screaming racial diatribes atomically, complete with n-words and eff-bombs and "I know where my kids are" when clearly, she didn't because she was more concerned with her coffee and then telling her kids to not play in front of the store's automatic doors? But it gets better. The woman had her say this morning on WBLK, Western New York's primary source for hip-hop and R&B music  , and didn't make herself sound a whole lot better. Blaming mental illness for hurtful attitudes isn't a coping mechanism, and teaching your kids to say hateful things as an example of your own behavior is probably a good way of getting local Child Protection Services involved in your situation (let alone the "stripping for cops" remark, or "I'm not racist; I have a black cousin", which may as well be "I'm not racist; I have a color TV"). So because I have a depression diagnosis, it's all of the sudden ok for me to get pissed and start spitting racial epitaphs once I perceive you have attempted to hit my child with a car, although from the video it's clear I've made the effort to come well out of the way to leave my kids otherwise unattended and get up in your window so I could tell you how much of a "nasty n*****" you are? God bless America for that right . And it doesn't stop there, my friends...the one radio station, out of the many in Buffalo, that would actually give this woman a chance to speak her mind (but clearly didn't have to offer that opportunity), so she could clear the air on the whole thing (and instead used that time to basically shit upon the chance to do so), offered up later on the Top Ten Racist Tweets From Stripper Mom Janelle Ambrosia  . I don't think her life is as over as she thinks it is. Maybe her black cousin will forgive her. I don't think my hometown of Cheektowaga will; but at the same time you're getting paid to take your clothes off while trying to raise kids with a Bi-Polar diagnosis, so something had to give at some point.

And with that, I'm cuttin' y'all short 'cuz I have food to get and there's mail to answer and reading to do and other things as well. Peace, don't hate, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!