Just Be There Blog

delayed blog entry

For writing endeavors, Friday started out fantastic. I accomplished 4 fairly well crafted reviews. I even tweeked up my review formatting a little bit and enjoyed reading some very well written poetry and short stories.

Oh, and Friday I was up before noon!

Saturday I wanted to repeat what I had accomplished Friday--HA! Joke's on me. I started to write in my blog and my muse decided to take a trip into memory lane. The result is probably a good 3-4 thousand word essay on my childhood history--a little bit fluffed but not altogether fluffed for anyone in the field of behavioral psychology. No, I didn't post it anywhere...Needs a lot of editing and "reworking" if I'm to let family or public see it. Even toned down it is rated 18+, just because of the magnitude of abuse I experienced before the age of 10.

For posterity's sake, when I started writing in my blog yesterday my intentions were merely to relate my tendency to be a horder. But I got tripped up by, what I recognize now as, an emotional trigger; of all things, a doll I possessed from age 4 until my mid thirties.

And that is all for that topic--I do not wish to become side tracked today--It's Sunday and the last day of my weekend!

Friday was huge in another respect. I cleaned house. erm rather, one room of my house. All flippin' day--12 hours spent between my muse and reviews and me finding my livingroom floor. I've been doing some major cleaning and organizing. Yesterday, I've added to the cleaning endeavors and was actually surprised that I only had to make four trips to the dumpster out back. Mostly paper trash, light and bulky, but my front room looks so very much uncluttered now. Even with sorting piles of books all over the floor, my front room looks better.

Ugh--The carpet is still an ugly brown--but, at least I can see the carpet again.


Another event which occurred yesterday--a rather, unpleasant and painful occurance I'm sure will take a week to heal from. In the process of picking up, sorting what to keep and stuffing what not to keep into trash bags, I have rearranged the furniture. The tom cat who shares his time with me for a place to get a stress free meal and a place to sleep, explored the changes. In the process of his exploration he jumped up on the desk and sat on my keyboard while I was reading...I'd just finished cutting the 'life story to be reworked later' blog and pasted into a text doc on my desktop. For some reason this cat was wound up tight--possibly from all the changes in what used to be familiar territory and possibly from some residual emotional residue from my recent walk through my childhood--Only, he didn't act like he was wound up. I scratched his ears and playfully scolded him for getting in my way then proceeded to lift him up and place him on the floor. He spazzed out--No, he FREAKED out. He went from one instant of purring to the next instant of frantic all claws slashing. Took me by total surprise and I couldn't unload the cat fast enough.

I surprised myself though...I didn't react to the sudden unreasonable pain with my usual violent tendencies. While cursing and screaming out painful exclamations (I can only wonder what my neighbors thought) I simply dropped him onto the floor. If I had reacted in my usual manner--he would have been thrown against the wall. So in that respect--one lucky cat. Not sure if throwing him would have caused me more hurt or less. I know I would have unloaded him a mere couple seconds sooner. His claws went very deep as it is. So in all respects, I'm glad I didn't throw him. I'd feel horrible if I had hurt him.

As it is, he blooded me proper. I mean that literally. I have deep puncture wounds on my right hand and some very deep slashing scratches on the top and underside of my right forearm. I washed the scratches almost immediately and the scratches on the top of my forearm bled pretty darn good. After washing I wrapped a hand towel around my arm and just let it bleed. Deep scratches.

Today, a very deep puncture wound on my ring finger has my whole finger swollen below the knuckle--good thing I don't wear rings. I will reopen the wound and clean it out again--I will need to put something on it to draw out the infection. The scratches on my arm are pretty ugly, and the deep ones have some bruising around them--Like I said they are deep cuts. But they aren't sore.

Mr. Fuzzles came in today and demanded to be loved on. Not sure if he was forgiving me or if asking for forgiveness--probably forgiving me for scaring him.


Also, today, I got up before 9am and I'm drinking my coffee and I've had my breakfast...I think, maybe--fingers crossed--I've made the transition to a daytime activity schedule.