The Screenwriting Group Articles

Character Introductions

Last week, I wrote about "Action Elements"  and four key guidelines to keep in mind while you're writing them. This week, I want to focus on one particular form of action element: the character introduction.

When you introduce a character, it's one of the few places in the script where you have some license to write what can't be seen or heard. The idea behind a character intro is to give the reader enough information to understand who this character is. It's also incredibly important because the script will eventually be sent to actors, and this is the first time an actor will get a sense of who the character is. You want it to be as interesting and compelling as possible so that there's a bit of excitement about who the character is and what they're trying to do.

Before we get too far into this discussion, I've pulled 20 character intro paragraphs from successful scripts (many have been produced, some haven't). Take a look at the different ways writers will introduce their characters:

ADAPTATION by Charlie Kaufman

Beamed ceilings and ostentatious fireplace. A few birthday cards on the mantel, two of them identical: "To Our Dear Son on His Fortieth Birthday." Charlie Kaufman, a fat, balding man in a purple sweater with tags still attached, paces the room. His incantational voice-over carpets the scene.

AMERICAN HISTORY X by David McKenna

TIGHT ON DEREK VINYARD. The young man has a shaved head, a trimmed goatee, and a SWASTIKA on his right tit – the center of the symbol crossed perfectly at the nipple. On the top of Derek in the bed is his barely-of-age girlfriend, STACEY. The covers are completely off and a BLACK ROSE is tattooed on her shoulder. Danny watches in awe.

ARGO by Chris Terrio

TONY MENDEZ, mid-40s, our hero. Fifth generation American. He’s had 19 years with the CIA and he’s the best exfiltration specialist the agency’s ever had.

DESPICABLE ME 2 by Cinco Paul & Ken Daurio

GRU steps toward camera, holding some sort of menacing gun, which he loads and cocks. He pulls the trigger, which shoots out an inflatable unicorn balloon.

DEVIL IN THE WHITE CITY by Christopher Kyle

DAISY BUTLER descends the steps to the street. She’s wide-eyed and dressed with rural simplicity and hardened city folk bustle past her as if afraid she’ll ask them for directions. Daisy wanders into the flow of pedestrians, wincing at the screech of the rails, trying to look as though she belongs...

GAME OF THRONES by David Benioff

LORD EDDARD “NED” STARK (40) sits on his motionless horse, his long brown hair stirring in the wind. His closely-trimmed beard is shot with white. He has spent half his life training for war and the other half waging it, and his face conveys both authority and a haunted sadness.

GET SHORTY by Scott Frank

CHILI PALMER, late thirties, sits in a booth with TOMMY CARLO, a low level mob type. Chili smokes a cigarette, stares out the window at the people on the street.

GHOSTBUSTERS by Harold Ramis & Dan Aykroyd

DR. PETER VENKMAN is administering an ESP test to two student volunteers, a boy and a girl, who sit across the table from him separated from each other by a screen.

INCEPTION by Christopher Nolan

The speaker, COBB, is 35, handsome, tailored. A young Japanese man, SAITO, eats as he listens.

INTOLERABLE CRUELTY by Joel & Ethan Coen

A handsome, fortyish man in a town car talks into cellular phone. This is MILES MASSEY.

KILLING ON CARNIVAL ROW by Travis Beacham

AISLING COBWEB, beautiful and intense, bursts from the tunnel into the narrow alley. Her body, petite, young, and frail, tense with fear. From her back sprout a pair of large moth-like wings, fragile, intricate, frayed at the edges. Aisling Cobweb is a faerie. And she's running for her life.

PASSENGERS by Jon Spaihts

We settle on one man. JIM PRESTON, 38. Sound asleep.

RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK by Lawrence Kasdan

At the head of the party is an American, INDIANA JONES. He wears a short leather jacket, a flapped holster, and a brimmed felt hat with a weird feather stuck in the band.

ST. VINCENT by Ted Melfi

On the bed, a Russian woman with a tortured accent, DAKA, rides on top of someone we’ll soon meet. Daka is lost in her 30s, rough, tattooed, too much makeup, and somewhere underneath it all...beautiful. Furthermore, she’s pregnant. Who knows how long, she’s so damn skinny.

SWORDFISH by Skip Woods

Three men sit at a window booth drinking coffee and talking. Two of the men sit on one side of the table; STANLEY is in his early thirties, AGENT ROBERTS, early forties. Both wear suits, the younger's is fairly expensive and well cut, the other's is polyester, enough said. The MAN across, however, is quite different. He is what they used to call a "cool-cat."

THE KING'S SPEECH by David Seidler

CLOSE ON - BERTIE - the Duke of York, second son of the King; his handsome, sensitive, features look terrified.

THE PERKS OF BEING A WALLFLOWER by Stephen Chbosky

It is a neat and tidy little room. Few posters or books. CHARLIE is 15. He is innocent, hopeful, awkward, and likable to everyone but his classmates. He sits at his desk, writing a letter in pencil as he tapes the title song through the radio on his cassette boom box.

THE PLACE BEYOND THE PINES by Derek Cianfrance, Ben Coccio & Darius Marder

LUKE GLANTON; 28, handsome; is in his trailer. Deep breath. He obsessively works with a butterfly knife in front of his mirror, before sticking it into a table. His OCD. He zips up a motorcycle jacket over faded prison tatoos, strides from his trailer into the crowded fairgrounds - rides, people, lights. He makes his way into a crowded tent.

THE SIXTH SENSE by M. Night Shyamalan

MALCOLM CROWE sits on the floor at the coffee table, his vest and tie on the sofa behind him. A jacket and an overcoat lay on a briefcase next to him. Malcolm is in his thirties with thick, wavy hair and striking, intelligent eyes that squint from years of intense study. His charming, easy-going smile spreads across his face. He points.

THE SOCIAL NETWORK by Aaron Sorkin

MARK ZUCKERBERG is a sweet looking 19 year old whose lack of any physically intimidating attributes masks a very complicated and dangerous anger. He has trouble making eye contact and sometimes it’s hard to tell if he’s talking to you or to himself.

There is no right or wrong way to write a character intro. Some writers are very sparse in their description while others cram as much information into the intro as they possibly can. You'll notice that scripts like PASSENGERS, INCEPTION, GET SHORTY, and INTOLERABLE CRUELTY are very simple in their presentation; just some basic information about how the character looks or what they're in the middle of doing. Other scripts like RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK, SWORDFISH, and SIXTH SENSE give us a sense of the character's style and/or general disposition. And still others like KILLING ON CARNIVAL ROW, AMERICAN HISTORY X, and PLACE BEYOND THE PINES paint a vivid picture of a scene unfolding as the character is introduced. Then there are scripts like THE SOCIAL NETWORK and GAME OF THRONES and ARGO which convey information you can't see in order to get across something about their characters' attitudes, experiences, or outlooks on life that inform how they'll act in future scenes. And within these various different styles are a myriad of other personal choices you can make, like whether to call out a very specific age like in PERKS OF BEING A WALLFLOWER (15), or an age range like in ST. VINCENT (30s), or not at all like in DEVIL IN THE WHITE CITY.

Obviously, there will be other opportunities to reveal character through the actions they take and the things they say in both opening scenes and subsequent scenes. Like in prose fiction writing, the point of a character intro isn't necessarily to tell the audience everything they need to know about a character, but rather to give them enough contextual information so that they understand where the character is coming from at the beginning of the story before they know much about the narrative or the characters. You just don't want a reader or an actor to go, "Why is this character doing that? I don't understand the choices s/he is making."

The character intro is still an action element, though, albeit one where there's a little bit of latitude available to stylistically present information. As such, it's a good idea to try and observe the general guidelines presented in the "Action Elements"  article from last week (with the exception of #2 about writing only what you can see and hear). Everything else (sparse writing, incomplete sentences are okay, don't change focus, four or five lines max, etc.) should be something you apply to your character intro as well.

One thing I specifically wanted to point out that you may have noticed in these examples is that the character name is written in ALL CAPS. It's a standard screenwriting formatting convention to write a character's name in all caps the first time they appear in a script. You don't have to do it every time the name appears, just the first time. The reason why this was adopted is for production personnel, so they can skim a script quickly to understand when a character is introduced and what scenes require which actors. You generally capitalize all actors (even bit players (minor characters) and extras (background characters), but again, only the first time you see them. Here are some examples with other types of characters added in:

JOHN enters the ballroom, scanning the CROWD as WAITERS bustle trays around the room.

Jane answers the door and signs the package handed to her by the MAILMAN.

Mr. X nods to his THUG, who grabs Tom by his jacket lapels.

In the first example, John, the Crowd, and the Waiters are all new characters (or groups of characters), which is indicated by the fact that all the names are presented in ALL CAPS. In the second example, however, it implies that Jane appeared in previous scenes, but that this is the first scene for the Mailman. Similarly, in the third example, Mr. X and Tom have appeared in the script before, but Mr. X's Thug is a new addition so his name appears in ALL CAPS.

That all might seem a little weird, but it's really easy to remember. When a character or unique group of characters appears for the first time, put 'em in ALL CAPS. Every time they appear in the script after that, regular capitalization is the way to go.

And the final thing I want to say about character intros is to have fun. This is one of the few places in a script where not even the sticklers will complain about writing something that can't be seen or heard, and where you have the opportunity to really leave a good impression. While you should definitely give thought to the context in which your character intro is presented (for example, you might not want a cumbersome, detailed description if the scene surrounding it is fast-paced or in the midst of a comedic beat), you should also embrace the creativity that you're allowed to use at this point in the script. Take the time to carefully craft a character intro that will leave an impression with your reader. Remember you're not just trying to get a reader to pass the script up the ladder to her boss; you're also writing the first moments when an actor will decide what they think of the character they're considering playing. You want that reaction to be, "Oh, how interesting! I want to know more about this character!"

Screenwriting Challenge

NOTE: Since I didn't actually put a deadline on the last challenge for "Action Elements" , we'll make the deadline for that assignment the same as this one. Both are due on the date below.

Using the things you've learned from this article and the ones before it, complete the assignment and post it using the following submission form:

SURVEY

Screenwriting Challenge Submissions  (13+) Use this handy form to submit your entries for The Screenwriting Group article challenges! #1545250 by Jeff

ASSIGNMENT: Write a character introduction for a protagonist, antagonist, or other major character in a script. Challenge yourself to try and give us an informative and/or entertaining snapshot of this character in five lines (approx. 50 words) or less.

DEADLINE: Friday 1/30 @ 11:59pm WdC time.

As always, you can post in the "The Screenwriting Group Forum"  if you have any questions or concerns and I'll do my best to answer. Make sure you tag me so I don't miss it!