Cabin Fever

Waiting Out a Dream

7-14-03

You're at the other end of the state,
still a million miles away.
And after every passing detail of this summer
I can't possible remove you
from my memory.
My heart's grown and shrunk and grown and shrunk
and grown again with every single "I miss you"
we've rattled off to extremes,
and even after all the thoughts
that "we may never happen"
I'm blessed to feel the way I do.

Your phone calls with frantic excitement
scare me to a calm.
Every time your voice gets faster,
I think of you in my arms
and I smile, knowing
what it should feel like
when someone feels like love.
To have you as close to me as that
is a bittersweet game at best;
I want to see what we've created
but hearing a taste is a tease I crave.
To see the shine of your smile
reflecting off my eyes and across your heart
is the dream I wake up for every day.

My ordinary place across the state
is just fine for supporting me.
But my otherwise non-descript
existence in this habitat
is brightened and opened wide
the minute your light shines in.
Maybe it's complicating or we're complicated,
or maybe it's so simple that we overthink it
but there's something so easy when I dream about you,
even when you're far from home.
I know it's crazy to find comfort sometimes
but in you I know exactly where to look.
And as strange as it sounds,
in my wishful state,
I know I could live a thousand lifetimes without you
and walk around lacking nothing.
But I'm living in just one right now
and all I'm missing throughout all of my days
is you and the wonders that you share.

I want to see the shine of your smile;
the gleaming, twinkling exuberance from your soul...
kissing me across charted miles of desire,
bridging the gap between us and our dreams.