Wondering about my Wanderings

I am drifter and I Have a mental illness

It is kind of cool to put a pen name in with a major concern of mine. I guess it does depend on how you think of your name or whatever is attached to your name. It is a curious thing. If the name is Charlotte, Jan or John, I am totally accepting and I want to give you a hug. I put my own name in the same slot and I am all thumbs.

How could I let that happen to me? After all aren't I suppose to have it all together.

It helped a lot to talk with my therapist today. He talked of compartmentalizing my disability or whatever it is I identify me with. Hey wouldn't be nice if I said I had a new car, a million dollars or even a free trip to wherever you want to go and I am willing to hand it all over to you with no strings attached.

I identify with the ownership of a God who calls me friend and asks me to do the same. Together God says we can see it all happen. Just think, Jesus saw the blind, mentally ill, lepers.....
He die not think twice about loving them Jesus also saw that he was crucified on a cross. I wonder what that felt like from a human perspective. All I did was for naught. I write this celebrating what I have and who I am, trusting that God can make it into a gift. It is kind of like the man born blind in order that God be glorified. Indeed, may God be glorified. To God be the Glory!