Perpetual Ruminations

Tuesday.

I'm going to do this a little different today. Usually when I get writing in a story, I don't manage to get anything written in my journal. My mind fills with thoughts and ideas for the story, I'm preocupied with naming and setting characters, and I'm eager to be writing. All of this is true today as well; I'm ready to start work on the prompt for this weeks challenge. Normally, I let myself settle in a bit, check Facebook, log in here and check messages and posts, then give in to my eagerness to be writting. Other times, when the prompt is difficult, I'm eager to work out a story line and become preoccupied with possiblitites, researching any ideas I get as well as researching for ideas. The end result is the same, I spend a great deal of time and energy getting the story going and writing in it. Once I complete the writing, either for the day or finishing the piece, I'm beat and any thoughts of logging in and writing in here are lost.

Today is much the same, as far as the story goes. I actually formed a general idea on Sunday shortly after seeing the prompt. But, it was my wife's only day off and I wanted to spend it with her. I should inject here that when I'm writing, I'm pretty much fully absorbed and lost in my writing. I not only forget to eat, but I'm so absorbed in my writing, I barely notice anything going on around me. So, with her only getting Sunday off, I didn't want to get absorbed into a story. I did want to look a the prompt and let my mind work a bit at generating some ideas, but that was all, and that I did.

Monday she had to be to work by five, so up at three. I normally sleep later when she has to work this early. I'm not much of a morning person, and if I do get up to see her off, I get in the way more than I help and she tends to run a bit late as a result. But, for some reason, I woke up shortly before four and just was not tired. I would like to say more about this, but perhaps further on, or another time. For now, it's only pertinent to me waking at four and getting up. I did pretty good not to distract her or throw her off schedule, but of course she did end up running a little late. the main reason being, we just enjoy each other's company a lot, and if we are both up, there will be conversation and interactions. Once she was ready, we sat and enjoyed a cup of coffee and some conversation before she left, setting her a little behind schedule.

For me, it was kind of strange to be up this early and not be so tired I return to bed. Even after working this early shift for over a year, I never adjusted to it, likely never will. But Monday, I was up and ready to go. I had a couple more cups of coffee while I reviewed posts in Facebook, then logged in here. Soon enough, the sun was rising and I was ready to start on my story, but the dogs wanted to go out, they wanted breakfast, and I was pretty hungry myself. By the time they had enjoyed a nice break outside, eaten, and I had my breakfast, the morning was running down. It was now nine, or shortly after, and I was pretty tired.

I had surgery a week ago and I've been very tired, taking naps in the afternoon, I've also been very uncomfortable sitting up for very long. Monday was much the same, but I wasn't so tired I wanted to nap. I would have worked on the story but I had already sat up to the computer for too long and needed to stretch out in the recliner for a bit. It was a good oppertunity for my Bible study while I reclined and sipped another cup of coffee. I know, way too much coffee; like many other things, I seem to run on java.

Once I finished my study, I was just too tired to concentrate on writing a story. I did put more thought into it, but I knew I was too tired to focus on writing without making a ton of mistakes. Besides, Rhonda would be done at noon, tired, and wanting to spend some time together. As it turned out, she didn't get home until after one, was so tired she wanted a nap, and I would have had time to do some work on my story. But, I was still too tired. Not tired enough to take a nap, I managed to stay up until nine last night. A breakthough in the healing process, not needing to nap everyday and not sleeping so much. Of course, a lot of this has likely been as much a side effect of the medications as a result of healing.

That brings us to today. I was up at six, spent a little time with Rhonda before she left for work, then took the dogs out. Once back in, it's time to eat somehting for them and myself, check out Facebook and log in here before starting in on that story. I was just about to close out and start on my characters when I decided it would be a good idea to jump over here and write an entry for the day. I was kind of at a loss of what to write, so I jotted down my thoughts and why I was doing this different, and here I am.

Earlier, I had mentioned I should say more about waking up so early on Monday. Now seems a good time. I doubt you will have much interest, but for me it's part of my thinking. No, not waking early, writing... silly. I process thoughts more indepth by writing them, I suppose that's why I'm a writer.

Sunday night we went to bed pretty early, since Rhonda needed to be up at three the next morning. In fact, with one person taking some time off, she has been working the opening shift since Wednesday of last week. So, being up at three, she's ready for bed by seven or eight at night. After the surgery, I've been very tired, so going to bed early is no problem. In fact, I've been getting tired easily for a long time, part of what brought me to having surgery. But, after the day surgery, I have been sleeping about twelve hours a day, sometimes more. Part of it is healing, and the other part is the pain medications needed while I heal. Yet another part is one of the symptems I've been having for a long time.

Sunday night, we ended up going to bed about eight, maybe eight-thirty by the time we actually were all settled in. I went to sleep quickly, but as is normal, woke a few times during the night, went to the bathroom, then returned to bed and to sleep. After eight hours, I woke and could not get back to sleep. This was the first night since I had surgery that I didn't sleep for ten to twelve hours. It was also the first time in -- I'm not even sure -- that I woke up and was not tired. Not only did I wake after about eight hours, woke up not feeling tired, but I didn't need to nap later in the day. I was tired, but not like I had been up to this point. We were up until nine last night, and I was still doing good. I also slept better last night, but still was up a couple times to go to the bathroom, not that I had to go that bad. I just wake up, and then once awake, get up, go to the bathroom, then return to bed and soon fall back to sleep; another question for my doctor not that some of the other stuff is cleared up.

For me, this is all good news. It feels great to wake up and not be tired. It feels even better to be able to make it through a day without feeling the need to take a nap. It may be a bit early to know if this was one day or if this will continue, but so far, day two is looking pretty good, too. I was up at six this morning, when I set my phone alarm it indicated eight and one half hours. I was up twice durring the night, and still feel good this morning. It's looking kind of positive and I'm hopeful that it will not only continue, but my energy levels will also increase as I continue to heal.

Now, if I can find a way to sleep through the entire night again. Hopefully the doctor will have some ideas why I wake up. It's not true insomnia, I'm still tired and can go right back to sleep. In fact, I find I have to fight off sleep to go to the bathroom and am sleeping again shortly after my head hits the pillow. Also, I don't have to go to the bathroom real bad, it's not what wakes me up. Even if I don't drink anything, as when I was doing some of the medical tests, I still wake up two, three, sometimes four times a night. On these occasions, I find myself waking up for no reason at all. I roll over, snuggle in and just go back to sleep. I can't imagine how it will feel to sleep all night, or how much energy and how good I'll feel getting a full night of un-interupted sleep. It's been so long, I really don't remember what it was like.