The Treatment Program of Absurdity: 1

Conflict With Will

In transition housing, students get to pick their chores form a list that is set up by the staff. On February 3rd, 2011, one of the available chores was to clean the baseboard in the kitchen. I noticed that there was only one dirty spot, so I decided to clean it, in which I technically completed my chore. I showed my ticket to Will, who had been moved to being the evening house manager in the guy’s transition house. Will told me that the bathtub also needed to be cleaned, but I said to Will, “All I care about is getting credit.” Will was forced to give me credit for cleaning the baseboard.
The next evening, one of the chores was to clean of the dryer, which I did. It was around 10:00, when I was watching The Simpsons at Polly House - Dr. Linkins had cut of all television at Great Ascendency, except for Polly House - Will came up to talk to me.
“Harry, you do not get credit for doing your chore.”
“Will, I cleaned the dryer.”
“No you didn’t!”
“Yes I did.”
“I don’t appreciate being called a liar.”
“Want to go over there, right now, so I can show you that I cleaned it.”
“I don’t need to; I know that it is dirty.”
“What do you want me to fix?”
“It is too late, chores are supposed to be completed by 9:00 P.M..”
“I did complete my chore.”
“How many times do I have to tell you that you did not?”
“Why can’t we just go over?”
“Because I know that the dryer is dirty.”
“Why are you being so obtuse?”
“I am not being obtuse; I know that the dryer is dirty.”
“Are you really so stupid that you won’t go take a look?”
“Harry, leave Polly House.”
“Elizabeth, why do they hire retards like this?”
“HARRY LEAVE!”
“What do you see in him? You deserve a man with at least one brain cell.”
“Harry, I said LEAVE.”
I went over to get Winfield Reese, so I could explain the whole situation to him. Winfield came over to the house, and noticed that the dryer had one very small spot on it, but other than that, it was relatively clean. I told Winfield that, “I wish Will’s mom had been able to afford a coat hanger because then he might not be here,” in which Winfield turned to me and exclaimed “SHUT UP.”
I did in fact end up getting credit for cleaning the dryer. I rubbed it in Will’s face, and Will called me a liar, accusing me of merely cleaning the dryer for Winfield Reese. This was a triumph for Harry Johnson.