The Treatment Program of Absurdity: 2

The War of The Roses

On Saturday, August 20th, 2011, everybody had to get up at 5:00 A.M. to go to the gym. Because no one in transition house was working out, Great Ascendency initiated an early morning athletic program; they had to make it compulsory for everyone, so they wouldn’t single anybody out. The guys in the core house were not too please about the new routine.
There had already been growing animosity, due to the fact that the program had been heavily altered in order to cater to the needs of the guys in the transition house. A bunch of basic classes had been initiated, such as how to iron, how to dress formally and how to shave; I was exempt, since these changes applied only to those who arrived after September 1st, 2010. It was decided that the transition house would get to permanently pick the weekend activities, since it was thought that it would be a motivator for them to do more.
The chosen activities for Saturday were watching Ice Age in the morning, and going to the park around dusk. The guys in core were so fed up with the students in transition picking boring activities. Matt had made a vow that once he got into transition, he would stay core house.
That night, Richard, Pat, Barron, Han and Samantha were playing on the jungle gym, when Mark, Matt, Luke John and myself all showed up. The core guys challenged the transition guys to a game of basketball; Harry Reid, who was absent, was still defined by the core guys as being one of them, where as Han was considered to be one of the transitions. we played four full quarters, so our game went from 8:00-9:30 P.M.; we won with a score of 101-3.
I continued to shoot some 3-point shots, most of which I missed, when Samantha came up to me and tried to tackle me for the ball, in which I grabbed Samantha, and I pinned him to the ground, in which I exclaimed, “’If not to Heaven, then hand in hand to hell,’ is what I would say if I had lost this fight. I crushed him like Superman would crush Lex Luther. I let Samantha go, after Samantha was screaming for help. Myself, Mark, Matt Luke and John all walked off into the grace sunset. That evening, Mark and Luke had a conversation.
“What the hell is wrong with Samantha?”
“Who knows? But what occurred to me is that Harry is the weakest person in our house, since Han isn’t one of us, and he defeated the strongest person in the transition house.”
“I think we have won the war.
“I just wonder what else Great Ascendency is going to do. You know they shut down the Wi-Fi code for transition that Harry gave us the password to because no one in that house was doing what they needed.”
“I was on the Internet last night.”
“They did it this morning.”
“Great! I can’t believe that Han allows the whole house to loose the Internet, and their laziness is what causes us to loose the remaining Internet access that we would have had.”
“I can’t wait till we start having to have classes on wiping your own ass, and they make everyone attend, in order to make it ‘politically correct.’”