Everyday Canvas

Facing One’s Illness

Prompt: The Handkerchief Dilemma-- when you wake up sick what is it that you focus on? Getting better or all the things that aren't getting done. Do you force yourself to do them anyway regardless if you're sick or do you just leave them until you're feeling better?

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I so hate being sick. Most of the time, I deny the not-feeling-well situation until it becomes undeniable. With my attitude, I push forward to do things, at least the doable ones. It is a miracle that I get better despite my denial and little to no rest.

In case that I wake up sick, I usually recognize something isn’t right, but I push on anyway or try some medicinal remedies that I can think of. I don’t deny, however, that I have gotten sick and I do attempt to see a doctor, just in case. I only minimize the symptoms mentally to some degree and try to live my life despite them.

Denial is my coping mechanism with the stress of illness because when I am ill, I lose control of my own life and I feel vulnerable. I don’t think I am a controlling person where others are concerned, but I get mad at myself when I lose my own self-control.

I also understand that denial has a dark side and it can be unhealthy, heaven forbid, if I might get a really serious illness. Downplaying the possible consequences of a healing rest can make a serious illness worsen. I hope I never get to that point.