thoughts, words, deeds

the costs of success

Fun Fact Friday! On this day in 1972, daredevil Evel Knievel broke 93 bones after successfully jumping 35 cars . What would you say has been your biggest success that also came with a great personal cost?

I don’t know. I have spent most of the past fifteen years of my life and all my time and money in getting my MFA. It took two programs/schools because I got sick in the middle. I made it. I graduated last August. And I’ve gained a lot along the way. I have a book of short stories that I am proud of, some pieces of creative nonfiction, and many poems. So, while it took a long time and all my resources, including the use of various aspects of my life inside the creative work, I think it was successful and worth it.

I learned from all my professors, peers, and students. I learned about what I want to do with my life. I learned how to turn heart sick agony into poetry and I’m approaching being able to turn it into short story. So, that has to be the answer. I think. Maybe.

But I’m tired and sore and my teeth ache, so I’m not going to be able to think of any other answer. Today involved a nearly forgotten dentist appointment, a trip to the zoo with my sister and her four kids (ages 11, 8, 5, and 2) and making dinner for all of the same, which involved peeling potatoes. I still have to do the dishes and possibly save the five year old from killing himself. That’s something we have to do periodically. He’s a little escape artist.

But it’s all worth it when my sister tells me that little Eddie wants to come to Aunt Rhyssa’s house, and is so excited about it that he asks when they’re going for two days running. So, maybe that’s a success. And the cost—this family should have another little boy, who would have been six next month if he hadn’t died at five days old. I love being an aunt.

Love can’t count costs.