We're all mad here.

An Un-birthday

White pawn to 6th row/rank - please do us all a favor and celebrate your un-birthday in a wonderful blog entry (or static item) (<1000 words)

I think that an unbirthday celebration would be difficult to hold, just because there are so many things to celebrate in my family. My mama has a board with a hook for each month and names with birthdays hanging from each hook. We have two in January, six in February . . . and that's just the birthdays. Then comes random other holidays like Pi day and May the fourth, and Easter and Halloween and Christmas. Technically, I can come up with a reason to celebrate on almost any day of the year.

In addition, there is the potential for celebrations for a third of a century (or two thirds or random other fractions) when someone turns 33.3 (or 66.6). In October, Daddy will be two thirds of a century old, and Mama is threatening to throw him a surprise party. We have to warn him because when he was a third of a century, Mama threw him a surprise party, complete with guests and people yelling surprise, which he promptly ignored and went out back to garden. He just couldn't imagine that the party was for him.

But today, we're going to celebrate the fact that there is nothing to celebrate. There are no birthdays, anniversaries, random celebratory happenings, holidays, or other reasons for me to go into the kitchen and bake a cake. It'll be a chocolate cake, because I like those best. I will make a fudge frosting. Probably, I'll just make quick fudge with sweetened condensed milk and chocolate chips (and a bit of nutella), add some extra milk so it doesn't set too hard, and pour that on top of the sheet cake. It'll be thick, but who doesn't like thick frosting.

It'll be the type of cake that will make my blood sugar rise just smelling it. And so, I suppose this had better be a virtual celebration. After all, we're not supposed to linger too close to each other at the moment. That way, I can invite everyone. My parents and my siblings and my nieces and nephews and my friends from church and from school and from online. There are too many of us to fit in my house, anyway. And we will all be having unbirthdays together.

I won't give or expect any gifts. After all, that's not what unbirthdays are about. Instead, we'll have games and puzzles and everyone will bring their favorite virtual dish and we'll sit in various corners and chat about everything. It will be a time when we create our own fun.

When we see someone new, we'll greet them by saying “Merry Un-birthday!” and if it is their birthday, we will shake our heads and tell them sorry, but we won't uninvite them. After all, they can't help that one day they don't have an unbirthday.

We'll chatter and play for hours, and when I get tired, I'll leave the party, and head to my own corner of my own house where I can curl up with my own book like the introvert that I am, and knit and grin and write something interesting and finally, when the day is done, I'll sleep and dream the Mad Hatter singing about the unbirthdays that we'll have again tomorrow and every uncelebratory day after that.

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