Everyday Canvas

Parents and Behavior and Future in Five years

For "Blog City ~ Every Blogger's Paradise" 
Prompt “We may be totally unaware that many of the challenges in our lives are not our issues. They are our parents’ issues,” says Shirley Rose in her book, Integration: Heal past Trauma and Prevent Future Trauma.
Which kinds of issues in one’s life can be their parents’ issues? Do you ever find yourself thinking, this isn’t me but my parent?

-----

It is easy to blame one’s problems on their parents, but blaming doesn’t help. Knowing the source of the problem does.

The way I see it, although abuse and mistreatment can put a heavy burden on a person’s psyche, it isn’t always the abuse or the mistreatment by a parent that may cause some of the people’s problems. Parents may do a wonderful job in their parenting, yet some issues may still originate or have something to do with the parents' own unexplored or ignored problems.

For example, if you had a wonderful mother who was also a neat freak and you as an adult, cannot fall asleep at night, thinking of the armchair you did not place just-so after sweeping under it, your neat-freak problem is coming from your mother. This is because children learn by imitating and a good portion of that imitating, they may think, is coming from their own selves and not from anyone else.

Some of the issues that may relate to parents in some way may have to do with:
• Which kinds of people we can tolerate and which kinds we can’t

• Money matters: Are we a big spender or are we thrifty, and does this have anything to do with our parents’ behavior with money? Do we think money is dirty or money is to be spent as soon as it is made and it doesn’t matter if we owe someone or some institution?

• The way we are with our own children: Are we knowingly or unknowingly passing on our parents’ expectations from us to our children? Watch out for your language, here. How many times did you catch yourself saying exactly what your parent used to tell you?

• The way we are with our work ethics or housekeeping and other areas: Watch out for stuff that is becoming a problem for you.

Having said all this, it doesn’t mean that all our actions, thoughts, and beliefs are our subconscious imitations of our parents. A good portion of those, we derive from our own life experiences.

Then, on the positive side, some imitations of our parents can be very useful if we have trusted and believed in their astuteness and knowledge. Such parents are a joy to imitate, but if you think you are having a problem with any of your behaviors, it is a good idea to think of its source. After all, parents are people, too.

For: "Space Blog Group" 

Prompt: What will life be like 5 years from now?

I have no idea. I am not even sure I’ll be around then or any of my friends or relatives will be either. This is because life is tricky and we never know what’s going to hit us next.

I am hoping, however, this Covid-19 will be something of the past and no other virus or epidemic like it will hit this planet again. On the medical front, I believe some serious advancements will be made in the studies of the human brain and hopefully Alzheimer’s and Dementia will have some positive treatments, if they are not totally eliminated.

I think more inventions are in the horizon, too. One of them could be, crossing my fingers, free internet for the entire planet. Also, again crossing my fingers, world hunger will be eliminated, and even by a farther chance, people will stop warring and fighting.

We may take some steps in exploring the solar system, as well, which I don’t see how it will benefit us, but as a general rule, I believe in exploring because you never know what you’ll find.