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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/books/item_id/1311011-Porthole/day/12-18-2023
Rated: 13+ · Book · Personal · #1311011
A terminal for all blogs coming in or going out. A view into my life.
Started July 1st 2019 for contests, etc. as other blogs are filling up and have other purposes.

Ferry boat between Solvorn and Ornes across the Lustrafjord i Sogn og Fjordane.




I'm starting a new blog because
BOOK
L'aura del Campo  (13+)
Online journal capturing the moment and the memory of moments. A meadow meditation.
#982524 by Kåre Enga in Montana
had over 1,200 entries and that was getting close to full. I don't want to trim it by deletion. I did that once, much to my dismay. Will be used more for poetry.

BOOK
Hoarfrosts from Hell  (GC)
Anything I'm not happy about or that I don't want in my main blog!
#997339 by Kåre Enga in Montana
is still hidden from the public and will remain so. It's more personal and full of angst. Was used for 30DBC for May 2020 and now used for Blogville.

BOOK
Enga mellom fjella  (13+)
Enga mellom fjella: where from across the meadow, poems sing from mountains and molehills.
#1317094 by Kåre Enga in Montana
was full... until the number of entries was increased. A mixed blog, mostly stories.

I'll be linking to
BOOK
On The Write Path  (13+)
ON THE WRITE PATH: travel journal for Around-the-World in 2015, 16, 18.
#2032403 by Kåre Enga in Montana
as I need to post there about my travels.

 
BOOK
O Pinions!  (XGC)
May my opinions gather wind under their wings and fly, perchance to soar.
#1501776 by Kåre Enga in Montana
is for my opinions. *Laugh*

BOOK
Nurture your Nature  (13+)
Look around. Let Nature nurture your Soul. I record images I sense and share them here.
#1439094 by Kåre Enga in Montana
was set up for nature observations and musings.

 
BOOK
Watt's Gnus  (18+)
On topics and today's gnus. Definitely opinionated. Set to 18+ for a reason.
#1439092 by Kåre Enga in Montana
come out of a need to share interesting stuff I come across. When I was young I did a small newsletter named as such. (or was it column in the newsletter? Been 30 years... I think.)

 
FOLDER
Flash Fiction  (GC)
Short 300 word, more or less, "stories" .
#2190336 by Kåre Enga in Montana
is where I put my flash fictions. Maybe someday I'll figure it out and have enough good ones to publish. Ratings vary and some are hidden from view.

I've started an appendix (I no longer have one personally) to keep track of my Space Cadet journals for Space Blog. It's a work constantly under construction. Mind the mess.
STATIC
Space Cadet - the never ending journal  (18+)
Journeys of an Alien Space crew.
#2226611 by Kåre Enga in Montana


I needed to start a folder for contests as there are so many deadlines and details to remember.
 
FOLDER
Conquest ... to keep track of contests  (18+)
A place to keep track of in progress works and up-coming deadlines as well as any awards.
#2233119 by Kåre Enga in Montana
(also very messy!) *Shock2*

 
FORUM
Blogville   (XGC)
Where bloggers meet and greet to read and share. No required prompt. Alias: blogville.
#2253938 by Kåre Enga in Montana
is for posting personal blog entries in hope that folks will comment and post their blog entries there as well. I will be commenting on all blog entries posted. It's my effort to rebuild a blogging community.

BOOK
Bibimbap 비빔밥   (13+)
Left-overs piled on hot rice and mixed.
#2296648 by Kåre Enga in Montana
an E blog focusing on food and culture. Easily digestible for the Queasy and Questioning.

December 18, 2023 at 12:25am
December 18, 2023 at 12:25am
#1061120
On-line article:

Even in a religious society, telling someone that you’ll pray for them can come across as disingenuous. Praying is all fine and good, and some people are well-meaning and the like, but it’s not really a show of sympathy, and it’s not really particularly helpful either.


It extends to other places this statement is used, such as in online circles and beyond. Maybe instead, we can try and come up with some genuine heartfelt words that sound sincere and isn’t the same parrotted statements.

To Storm:

Time by volume... like filling up a balloon or a room or... I dunno. My morning routine was about 1 meter squared... cut in half. How many squares can I stack in a day? What's the size of my room/body/life I inhabit?

I'm filling up my time dog paddling through this experience in Thailand. I figure that swimming is better than drowning. Been there before.

My relationship... is rocky at the moment. Nice 1 minute snuggle this morning; but frankly, I want more. Regardless of his issues... I could use a therapist to help me deal with mine.

My back is doing somewhat better with daily exercise (or exorcise as I call it). I don't take good care of myself when I'm alone. I shouldn't be alone.

My chiropractor friend told me a long time ago (over 20 years) that one of my issues was my mother. She used Bio-Energetic Synchronization Technique (B.E.S.T.) if I remember right. When my mother died last year at age 99 I felt a weight lifting. I was 'free'. Mind you, she'd become a sweet old lady; but, my inner child still remembered the Before Times. I find it sad in retrospect.


To Robert:

1. "I really want to _____.

2. "If you take the attitude [...] that you're only doing what you want to do [...] then all the time is yours.

3. "If there's something you think you want to do, but never seem to have the time to do it, then maybe you don't really want to do it."

I feel better when I WANT to exercise in the morning. I do it regardless because it has truly helped me. But I don't "work" and mornings were the bane of my existence when I did. After two cups of coffee and 10 a.m. you can talk to me now.

I decided in 2009 (long time ago for Gen Z) that I finally wanted to go back to Costa Rica. Took me 35 years, but I've written about that ad nauseam. That led to travel, something I remembered wanting to do when I was 11. Advice: listen to your inner child.

I wanted to come to Thailand. So, I did. I didn't "have to". Now, I'm divided. Part of me wants to leave soon, part of me wants to leave later, part of me wants to just stay. I will "have to" leave but whether I come back depends on want versus need.

I only have so much time. I can waste it or spend it. Either way the Hourglass empties. My work-life wasn't totally wasted. It just felt like that at times. Would I have been happier chasing happiness rather than showing up for a paycheck so I could eat?


The Solstice cometh. It's drier and cooler in Isan in north-east Thailand. The sun doesn't burn as much and shadows are longer. I can keep the windows open when the air pollution isn't dangerous. Folks are out and about a tad more. In Troms in Northern Norway the sun set around November 21st. It won't peek above the horizon until Soldag... around January 19th. In Montana it's just cold and snowy. Where I grew up... ditto.

(exercise) = Exor. (observations) = obsv. (s***,shave,shower) = ss&s. (read something) = read. (comment blogs) = bogs. (BoyLove series on-line) = ytBL. (Thai TV BL series on GMMTV25) = tv25. (write poetry or prose) = PorP. (take a daily walk) = walk. (buy something) = shop. (take a photo) = foto. (video) = วิดีโอ. (speak Thai/Lao) = pôod. (learn Thai) Thai. (go-into-the-water) = pool. (clothes) = wash. (cook something) = cook. (tidy up) = mess. (travel) = trip. (noon) = เที่ยง. (talking to ex-pats/travelers/strangers in European) = chat. (Thai teaching book) = book. (hand written journal) = jour. (contests) = test. (water) = agua. (National Blog Post Month) NBPM. Groan Groan smiley


24 desember *Candy1* 24 ธันวาคม

*Checkr* PorP. ""Lefty" D23 #18 40w 'demonstrate'
*Checkr* exor. 300/300/300/300 = 1200. 10:47-11:22. 70-ish. Uninterested.
*Checkr* obsv. breeze; chairs stacked; small clouds; unhappy thoughts.
*Checkr* ytBL. Last Twilight "Mee took her shadow by the hand." Watched Ep.7 with subtitles.
*Hourglass* เที่ยง. 72 degrees. AQ 51 (poor)

*Checkr* PorP. ""Nazaré" Dec24 #19 40w 'brave' This should fulfill the requirements of the challenge.
*Checkr* ss&s. Late, but better than never. Put on a short sleeve but heavy fabric shirt. Red, of course.
*Checkr* walk.
*Checkr* foto. bao.
*Checkr* shop. merit flowers, buns, coffee.

Pan seems a bit better; but, he sleeps and says little. He isn't here when he works and he isn't here when he's here. *Sad* He slept a lot but he's cooking, a good sign.

23 desember *Candy7* 23 ธันวาคม

*Checkv* bogs. Robert/Storm/Tracker
*Checkv* exor. 300/300/260/300 = 1160. Very windy. A chill 55 degrees.
*Checkv* foto. "Back to School", Nong Lek.
*Checkv* ss&s.
*Clock2* เที่ยง. 73 degrees. Noon here is midnight WDC. It means I'm now on 'today' for my posts... Today that's okay, but sometimes it's a pain.
*Checkv* blog. "Sleeping Beauty and "R U A ... article from 1941!.
*Checkv* walk. Nong Bua and Nong Lek. Nasty trash and nasty dogs.
*Checkv* tv25. "Cherry Magic" Interesting but I was also trying to take care of Pan.

It took me 1 hour to get Pan to take his meds. He's hot-and-cold (Hot-brow; frozen-hands). I'm truly upset... again. He comes home and promptly gets sick. This is not the life I signed up for. I'm distraught because I don't know what to do and I fear doing something wrong.

22 desember *Candy4* 22 ธันวาคม

*Checkb* bogs. Mighty/Crabby/Apondia/Kat
*Checkb* exor. 300/300/300/300 = 1200. Very cold wind chill. 10:00-10:26. 66 degrees.
*Checkb* foto.
*Checkb* obsv. green and red banners, cold brisk breeze, one dove, laundry hanging fragrant, cough, warm sun.
*Checkb* ss&s. Checked off before I did it because I don't want to... Now I must. Scrubbed toes.
*Checkb* เที่ยง. 69 degrees
*Checkb* PorP. ""No Gift From Santa This Year" D22 #17 40w 'poverty'
*Checkb* walk.
*Checkb* agua. 10 liters (5 today; 5 yesterday)
*Checkb* blog. "Close family and friends... "Once Upon A Time"
*Checkb* tv25. "Last Twilight"

Pan came home earlier than I expected. He feels... distant. Thais do pleasant but distant well; so, I don't know what to think at the moment. He got up to cook, but... *sigh*

To Seven: My generation didn't move around as much. Once we did it was harder to keep in touch. My younger sister though still lives in the same house since she was born.

Pittsburgh... wonder whether we still have family there. My Aunt Verna lived her entire life in Jeannette and Uncle Jerry was in the vicinity. New York, Arizona, Washington, Texas, Arkansas, Florida, California, New Jersey... people drifted or ran away. Once my grandfather died and my uncle whisked my grandmother away, the family fell apart. It took years for me to realize that they were never close to begin with.

My father's family (centered in WNY), as grouchy as Olde Swedes can be, did much better. I even have cousins in South Carolina in the Greenville area. I should call and say hello...

I'm happy to read this entry. It contrasts to my isolation, loneliness and depression in Montana and Thailand. I didn't have a close network of friends growing up but I was looking forward to our HS class reunion. Then covid...

You are blessed. It's great to have friends around the world (there are wonderful people everywhere *Smile*), but last night there was no one to talk to. I did get good advice from an Aussie I met in Costa Rica who is relaxing in Ecuador... but it's not the same as sitting at the kitchen table (we were kitchen folks) playing cards.

And... "This entry went exactly where it needed to go. I don't drink alcohol; but, All Hail Mimosa!

I'm a bit like both of you. I'm warm but can be no nonsense. I'm a day dreamer who overthinks and overplans. Finding someone to compliment me has been a lifelong struggle. I want someone to be my 'home' but want to take them with me. Maybe I need a dog?"

21 desember *Candy3* 21 ธันวาคม

*Checko* exor. 400/300/400/500 = 1600. 59-61 degrees. Cold. 07:36-08:07.
*Checko* bogs. Jennifer/Joy/Tracker
*Checko* cook. Salmon steamed over rice mixed with potato/carrot/garlic/egg.
*Clock* เที่ยง. 77 degrees.
*Checko* PorP. ""Breakfast Break" D21 #16 40w 'beaker'
*Checko* ss&s.
*Checko* tv25. Faceless Love ... but not into it tonight.
*Checko* blog. "Avoidance and lying.

To?: I have realized that I shouldn't live alone. Unless it's a wee cottage in the Cotswold with a wee cat on me lap. Distance is definitely a factor in my family. In general this American notion that old folks should move to Florida to golf with other old folks hasn't helped maintain family units or communication between generations.

Thanksgiving follows harvest time and a time of plenty. Makes sense to finally rest. Winter in the North was also a time of rest.

Many customs are 'transplanted'. I grew up in an area that embraced the German traditions. Costa Rica embraced the Mediterranean customs. In Thailand the Northern European version has become plastic and commercial. The lights are nice though.

To Joey: Not the Christianity surrounding me when I was a child. And that's the problem. It would be nice if Christians would put the words of Christ at the center of their beliefs.

To Sharon: Yes. Exactly. They aren't the Words of Christ and have no right to be the center of any belief system named after Him. I'd quote Psalm 137.9 but you are quite aware of that awful verse.

20 desember *Candy5* 20 ธันวาคม

*Checkg* exor. 350/300/300/300 = 1250. Approximate. 68-75 degrees. 08:54-09:26.
*Checkg* obsv. tables, lights, bees mostly gone?, fly, sea of purple trumpets, 3 xmas trees.
*Checkg* ss&s. scrubbed toes a tad; mustache mostly gone.
*Checkg* bogs. NormaJean/MRobert/Brian
*Clock2* เที่ยง. 82 degrees.
*Checkg* blog. "Lonely Ghost And 5 comments. Thank you.
*Checkg* PorP. ""Miss Pauline Katherine Jensen" D19 #15 40w 'still'
*Checkgr* tv25. Faceless Love... but it doesn't thrill me. Pretty actors; office based; not deep.
*Checkgr* Thai. body parts. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R3FxhwPWVm8

Pan came home... briefly... makes me very sad.

Merit Badge in Shadows and Light
[Click For More Info]

A huge congratulations, to you! You have won an Honourable Mention in  [Link To Item #shadows] .

Beautiful writing! I look forward to reading more of your work next year *^*Wink*^*

Rachel *^*Heartv*^*
Shadows and Light


19 desember *Candy7* 19 ธันวาคม

*Checkp* Thai. Scold me! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hWl6BkBghTg
*Checkp* PorP. ""Let it go" D18 #14 39w 'carrying'
*Checkp* exor. 400/400/400/500 = 1700. 75 degrees. 09:44-10:29. Slow and easy today.
*Checkp* obsv. fresh mown grass (petrichor?); noisy mower; wood bee; worker chatter; metal clatter (scaffold); heron hoot; bird twatter...
*Checkp* ss&s.
*Checkp* bogs. Beholden/Mouse/Whirls
*Clock2* เที่ยง. 82 degrees
*Checkp* blog. "Just because I'm 'silly'.

18 desember *Candy8* 18 ธันวาคม

*Checky* exor. 300/300/300/300 = 1200. Lackadaisical. 09:59-10:24 75 degrees.
*Checky* PorP. ""TM" D17 #13 40w 'truth'
*Checky* bogs. Kitti/Carolyn/Flick and Robin.
"It takes a village" — local, regional, global. Knowledge is kept alive by those who cherish it."
*Clock2* เที่ยง. 81 degrees.
*Checky* blog. "Happy? Unhappy?
*Checky* foto. I inhale your fragrance so I'll remember long after I am gone know that you are forever loved
*Checky* pôod.
*Checky* walk.
*Checky* shop. กาแฟ (red,green,blue), ซื้อต้มข่าไก่
*Checky*

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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/books/item_id/1311011-Porthole/day/12-18-2023