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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/books/item_id/1311011-Porthole/month/7-1-2023
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Rated: 13+ · Book · Personal · #1311011
A terminal for all blogs coming in or going out. A view into my life.
Started July 1st 2019 for contests, etc. as other blogs are filling up and have other purposes.

Ferry boat between Solvorn and Ornes across the Lustrafjord i Sogn og Fjordane.




I'm starting a new blog because
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BOOK
L'aura del Campo Open in new Window. (13+)
Online journal capturing the moment and the memory of moments. A meadow meditation.
#982524 by Kåre เลียม Enga Author IconMail Icon
had over 1,200 entries and that was getting close to full. I don't want to trim it by deletion. I did that once, much to my dismay. Will be used more for poetry.

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BOOK
Hoarfrosts from Hell Open in new Window. (GC)
Anything I'm not happy about or that I don't want in my main blog!
#997339 by Kåre เลียม Enga Author IconMail Icon
is still hidden from the public and will remain so. It's more personal and full of angst. Was used for 30DBC for May 2020 and now used for Blogville.

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BOOK
Enga mellom fjella Open in new Window. (13+)
Enga mellom fjella: where from across the meadow, poems sing from mountains and molehills.
#1317094 by Kåre เลียม Enga Author IconMail Icon
was full... until the number of entries was increased. A mixed blog, mostly stories.

I'll be linking to
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BOOK
On The Write Path Open in new Window. (13+)
ON THE WRITE PATH: travel journal for Around-the-World in 2015, 16, 18.
#2032403 by Kåre เลียม Enga Author IconMail Icon
as I need to post there about my travels.

 
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BOOK
O Pinions! Open in new Window. (XGC)
May my opinions gather wind under their wings and fly, perchance to soar.
#1501776 by Kåre เลียม Enga Author IconMail Icon
is for my opinions. *Laugh*

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BOOK
Nurture your Nature Open in new Window. (13+)
Look around. Let Nature nurture your Soul. I record images I sense and share them here.
#1439094 by Kåre เลียม Enga Author IconMail Icon
was set up for nature observations and musings.

 
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BOOK
Watt's Gnus Open in new Window. (18+)
On topics and today's gnus. Definitely opinionated. Set to 18+ for a reason.
#1439092 by Kåre เลียม Enga Author IconMail Icon
come out of a need to share interesting stuff I come across. When I was young I did a small newsletter named as such. (or was it column in the newsletter? Been 30 years... I think.)

 
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FOLDER
Flash Fiction Open in new Window. (GC)
Short 300 word, more or less, "stories" .
#2190336 by Kåre เลียม Enga Author IconMail Icon
is where I put my flash fictions. Maybe someday I'll figure it out and have enough good ones to publish. Ratings vary and some are hidden from view.

I've started an appendix (I no longer have one personally) to keep track of my Space Cadet journals for Space Blog. It's a work constantly under construction. Mind the mess.
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Space Cadet - the never ending journal Open in new Window. (18+)
Journeys of an Alien Space crew.
#2226611 by Kåre เลียม Enga Author IconMail Icon


I needed to start a folder for contests as there are so many deadlines and details to remember.
 
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FOLDER
Conquest ... to keep track of contests Open in new Window. (18+)
A place to keep track of in progress works and up-coming deadlines as well as any awards.
#2233119 by Kåre เลียม Enga Author IconMail Icon
(also very messy!) *Shock2*

 
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FORUM
Blogville  Open in new Window. (XGC)
Where bloggers meet and greet to read and share. No required prompt. Alias: blogville.
#2253938 by Kåre เลียม Enga Author IconMail Icon
is for posting personal blog entries in hope that folks will comment and post their blog entries there as well. I will be commenting on all blog entries posted. It's my effort to rebuild a blogging community.

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BOOK
Bibimbap 비빔밥  Open in new Window. (13+)
Left-overs piled on hot rice and mixed.
#2296648 by Kåre เลียม Enga Author IconMail Icon
an E blog focusing on food and culture. Easily digestible for the Queasy and Questioning.

July 30, 2023 at 9:59pm
July 30, 2023 at 9:59pm
#1053354
(exercise) = Exor. (observations) = obsv. (s***,shave,shower) = ss&s. (read something) = read. (comment blogs) = bogs. (BoyLove series on-line) = ytBL. (Thai TV BL series on GMMTV25) = tv25. (write poetry or prose) = PorP. (take a daily walk) = walk. (buy something) = shop. (take a photo) = foto. (video) = วิดีโอ. (speak Thai/Lao) = pôod. (learn Thai) Thai. (go-in-the-water) = pool. (clothes) = wash. (cook something) = cook. (tidy up) = mess. (travel) = trip. (noon) = เที่ยง. (talking to ex-pats/travelers/strangers in European) = chat. (Thai teaching book) = book. (hand-written journal) = jour. (contests) = test.

*GemBL* 6 สิงหาคม 2566 *GemBL*

*Checkr* news.
https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/the-biggest-threat-to-america-isn-t-trump-or-m...
*Checkr* exor. 300/200/200/400 = 1.000 79 drizzly degrees.
*Checkr* เที่ยง. 79°F 26°C drizzle *Cloud*
*Checkr* PorP "There 🇺🇸 [84] A6 40w 'failure'Open in new Window.
*Checkr* bogs. Neva/Lyn/Joy
*Checkr* blog. "August rains down upon usOpen in new Window.
*Checkr* ss&s.
*Checkr* face. photo of lantern (bought in Luang Prabang) that Pan set up last night.
*Checkr* walk. We went to see Barbie.
*Checkr* foto. Barbie.
*Xr* tv25. We got back late.

Pan has hiccups but doesn't want to go to 7/11... another day he'll spend in bed. Another day wasted for me. I did my exercise in the drizzle. I fetched filtered water. I will attack each task without joy, but in the knowledge that in the end it matters... to me... if no one else. Depression creeps in when I realize 'I matter to no one else". No one calls. No one sends messages. No one comments. I could scream and no one would notice. But that's hyperbole. Someone here would chew me out for screaming.

And, yes, people do care... a little... and even send me a message! or comment on spoosebase! or speak if I speak first! or... well, that's about the extent of it.

To huser:nordicnoir (Ned) "Wonderful poem. I see it in my mind. *HeartO*

I don't have these memories of my childhood. I couldn't see without my glasses and wasn't allowed to play with them. Someone throwing a ball at me was terrifying."

To QotD: "My phone is a hotspot in Thailand. In Montana? Go to a cafe... if one is open.

Activities off line: walk, swim (not alone), try talking to people! (not always successful). In Montana I could read or watch movies. In Thailand I can watch TV.

Years ago... just visit friends and play cards or chat. Years ago... garden. I don't have a garden and I don't have friends anymore."

Merit Badge in Fantasy Writing
[Click For More Info]

  *^*Dragon2*^* Congratulations! You won the poetry section of the  [Link To Item #2125220]  *^*Starv*^*
Fantasy Writing


For:
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STATIC
Playing hide-and-seek Open in new Window. (13+)
Zmitri and I stir the seas up then chase each other through the stars of Pleiades.
#2300770 by Kåre เลียม Enga Author IconMail Icon


*Gemv* 5 สิงหาคม 2566 *Gemv*

*Checkv* exor. 300/200/200/300 = 1.000 10:01-10:35 75-79 degrees. *Cloudgrey* Rain.
*Checkv* news.
*Checkv* wash. Done. Hung.
*Clock2* เที่ยง. 79°F 26°C *Cloud*
*Checkv* blog. "Warped Health Shoon ... A Single-service Society.Open in new Window. "Intersections, home or no home? Open in new Window.
*Checkv* bogs. Lilli/Beholden/Petra
*Checkv* ss&s.
*Checkv* PorP. " Grenada 🇳🇮 [83] A5 40w 'beauty'Open in new Window.

To Neil: "Yep. Yesterday had one horrendous moment. Today is much better.

I am aware about the lack of quality in Thailand but for many things... like shirts... it's not an issue. However... shoes are a different matter. Overall, stuff is so cheap (when compared to US) that I don't worry much about that (I'm a worry-wort).

I am irked about this being a throw-away society though. That's hard for me.

I feel safe in Udon. Being gay or being in a relationship isn't an issue, especially in Udon. Being a foreigner isn't a problem as well. The people aren't born thieves (like in Costa Rica) or violently confrontational (like in the USA).

However, I walk... Thai's don't and crossing a street needs three Hail-Mary's. Plus, I feel desperately isolated.

I'm still breathing, although frequently short-of-breath.

Thanks for responding."

*Checkv* shop. veggies, pork, eggs.
*Checkv* tv25. Enigma คน มนตร์ เวท. Spooky ending.
*Xv* walk. two short forays... but no long walk like yestereve. Pan is jealous if I go out at night.
*Xv* pool. Ask Pan.
*Checkv* pôod. a little.

*Gemt* 4 สิงหาคม 2566 *Gemt*

*Checkb* bogs. Robert/Neil/Joshua
*Checkb* blog. in progress
*Checkb* news.
https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/why-so-many-americans-have-stopped-going-to-ch...
*Checkb* face. foto of dates. อินทผลัม
*Clock2* เที่ยง. 79 degrees. *Cloud* some sprinkles.
*Checkb* exor. 250/100/100/250 = 700 79 degrees and sprinkling.
*Checkb* cook. Dates, onions, bologna over rice that Pan cooked. Decent.

Pan is sleeping in... I get worried but what can I do? If he is eating (I remind him) and taking his meds he should be okay, but I check on him to make sure he's still warm and breathing.

*Checkb* ss&s.
*Checkb* shop. 7/11. coke.
*Checkb* PorP. "Loggia dei Lanzi (Firenze) 🇮🇹 [82] A4 40w 'pain'Open in new Window.
*Checkb* walk.
*Checkb* foto.
*Checkb* chat. Short chat with Pear at Koala. She also owns Surada next to where I live. Coffee?
*Checkb* ytBL. finished Home School ep. 16. (w.o. Eng sub) Almost at the end. Extremely disturbing.
*Clock2* 79 dregrees at 00:11. Never got hot. Sprinkling.

I made a big mistake today. I always make mistakes when I get frustrated. And then I may have made another. But... I decided to take a walk, a long lonely walk at night. That helped a bit.

*Gemo* 3 สิงหาคม 2566 *Gemo*

*Checko* news. same-o same-o.
*Checko* face. bi-color waterlily.
*Clock* เที่ยง. 82 degrees *Cloudgrey* *Dropb*
*Checko* exor. 200/100/150/250 = 700. 82°F Damp, puddlelicious. 12:17-12:39
*Checko* foto.
*Checko* วิดีโอ. swing.
*Checko* chat. David x 2 (re meds), Rick.
*Checko* bogs. Sonali/Phyllis/Tiggy and GreenWillow.
*Checko* blog. "Holding on, letting go, or never giving up. Open in new Window.
*Checko* walk. rose.
*Checko* shop. octopus, chicken, 2 potatoes.
*Checko* tv25. Home School.
*CheckO* pôod. With Nan at new soup place.

Pan 'woke up'. Unfortunately I feel like a wet noodle. He's chipper. I'm depressed. At least we both ate a little. He went... somewhere... called... seems happy. He cooked in the evening: chicken with malago, potato and egg.

*Gemg* 2 สิงหาคม 2566 *Gembl*

*Checkg* exor. 200/100/200/300 = 800. Fairly cool, damp, 79°F. Saw Tom.
*Checkg* bogs. NormaJean/Annette/Lyn
*Checkg* blog. "Green weepy dayOpen in new Window.
*Clock2* เที่ยง. 81°F *Clouds*
*Checkg* PorP. "The path of sweets. 🇵🇹 [80] A2 'sweet' 40wOpen in new Window.
*Checkg* face. Incredibly quiet considering... posted pic.
*Checkg* news. A five letter word used to bid in bridge was just indicted.
*Checkg* walk.
*Checkg* foto. my neighborhood.
*Checkg* test. "Green inkOpen in new Window. To Shadows&Light. "After oolong teaOpen in new Window. To Intuey.

*Checkgr* shop. food. The important part was getting Pan out of bed and out to the market. Still not well.
*Checkgr* tv25. Home School. kinda.
*Checkgr* Thai. Close sounds... very good! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WxqXAev_ZZA
*Clock2* Midnight. 80°F

Merit Badge in Fantastic
[Click For More Info]

  Congratulations on your 2nd place Win in  [Link To Item #2002225] . Nice job *^*Delight*^* Hope to see you again! *^*Heart*^* Tracey
Fantastic

To Angela W on fb re 'putting on clothes when leaving a locker room': "There may be a specific dress code. Some people think a thong and nipple covers = clothes. The tourists in Vang Vieng in Laos were scandalous. Totally disrespectful. Wanna go nude? There are beaches in your own country for that."

Alfred Booth wrote on fb: "4:11 am Awakened by her light streaming through the window. She finally broke through the evening’s thick clouds" Something can be done with this image... just saying...

*Gemp* 1 สิงหาคม 2566 *Gemp*

*Checkp* ss&s.
*Checkp* วิดีโอ. birdwing in flight.
*Checkp* obsv. lots of walkers after sunset. season of falling spent leaves.
*Checkp* foto. Nong Bua.
*Checkp* walk. wat, Nong Bua, market. Felt weak coming back.
*Checkp* shop. big blue jug for water. 199 baht; hold about 12 liters.
*Checkp* exor. 300/200/200/300. Warm with sprinkles but after sunset. Doable.
*Checkp* tv25. The Jungle.
*Checkp* PorP. "Buda and Pest 🇭🇺 [79] A1 40w 'create'Open in new Window. Will use my travel blog.
*Xp* pool.
*Xp* ytBL.
*Xp* Thai.

Pan woke up okay but his first words irked me and then he got an attitude and was possibly depressed. I didn't have time for that today and he left and didn't come home.

Finished last contest before midnight WdC time. Barely.

*Gemy* 31 กรกฎาคม 2566 *Gemy*

Odd dream in the sense it took me back in time to another place to a 'younger' me. Not a nightmare although foreboding and seductive. Cannot afford to get lost in dreams today. So much to do! Damp morning after overnight sprinkles.


*Checky* bogs. Petra/Dave/Neva/Grace/Gale. I should comment less when I'm not 100% 'here'.
*Checky* news.
*Clock* เที่ยง. 86F 30C *Clouds*
*Checky* exor. 200/100/200/300 = 800. 86 degrees 12:06
*Checky* ss&s.
*Checky* PorP. Finished with 40w. "Last day [74f.zm] 40w J19 'enthusiasm'Open in new Window.

To Duchess Laughing Lemurs: "I need to finish writing for July contests... *Worry* I've decided I need to put on music until the thunderstorms roll in. I prefer the patter of rain... or silence; but, I can't totally control either (I share this place).

To iguanamountain (Gale): "Belice? *Smile* I'm writing from Thailand. Hot and humid in July... what else is new! Hoping for rain.

I think that like any new tool AI will have powerful uses and misuses. But, there's always the option of opting out. I started writing again in my hand-written journal and I pay with cash. I do use the internet but google has become so monetized as to be almost worthless.

Hawthorne Mythos... I have written more Zmitri poems and I need to get back to my two vampire series.

I find working on-line is different from paper. I can edit better on-line... if the chromebook and connection is working properly.

I'm thinking of Debussy. Yeah, background music. Hopefully it calms me down without lulling me into a dreamy neverland called sleep."


*Checky* test. Fantasy: "Playing hide-and-seekOpen in new Window. WDC: "Not your problemOpen in new Window. Senior: "To fly [year162.ff] (296w)Open in new Window. Fogg: "NightwingsOpen in new Window.
*Checky* shop. ramen. water jug. money.

Met Pan on the way. I gave him my umbrella. It's now a downpour. Did he think of that? I doubt it! He believes in door-to-door service so I'll be surprised if he walks. His problem. I need to focus! 19:10... no Pan. It stopped but will it start again?

In looking over contests I have to remember which I must enter and which I can let slide.

*Checky* tv25. The Jungle ... only part. Pan was ill.

Merit Badge in Be Romantic
[Click For More Info]

Thanks for your brilliant contributions.
Be Romantic



7704
July 23, 2023 at 11:13pm
July 23, 2023 at 11:13pm
#1052979
(exercise) = Exor. (observations) = obsv. (s***,shave,shower) = ss&s. (read something) = read. (comment blogs) = bogs. (BoyLove series on-line) = ytBL. (Thai TV BL series on GMMTV25) = tv25. (write poetry or prose) = PorP. (take a daily walk) = walk. (buy something) = shop. (take a photo) = foto. (video) = วิดีโอ. (speak Thai/Lao) = pôod. (learn Thai) Thai. (go-in-the-water) = pool. (clothes) = wash. (cook something) = cook. (tidy up) = mess. (travel) = trip. (noon) = เที่ยง. (talking to ex-pats/travelers/strangers in European) = chat. (Thai teaching book) = book. (hand-written journal) = jour.

*Poseyr*30 กรกฎาคม 2566*Poseyr*

*Checkr* jour. Page 5387-5388.
*Checkr* exor. 300/200/210/300 = 1010. Pan hugged me too tight = bruised ribs.
*Checkr* obsv. two birds with long tails (drongos?), yellow flash of a birdwing, b&w butterfly, sprinkles.
*Checkr* PorP. "Alien in Aisle Eleven! [180.75] 8-lines Open in new Window. "Glacier [74e.zm] 39w J18 'emotion'Open in new Window. "Last day [74f.zm] 40w J19 'enthusiasm'Open in new Window.
*Clock2* เที่ยง. Mostly cloudy 87°F 31°C. Sultry.
*Checkr* ss&s.
*Checkr* blog. "Fanged in the Summer HeatOpen in new Window.
*Checkr* ytBL. Home School ep. 16 first half.
*Checkr* pool. I couldn't cross it 4 times... *Sad*
*Checkr* tv25. Hidden Agenda... yet another silly BL.
*Xr* walk.

I had to update chrome. So far... ts'okay.

Pan is preparing supper and I'm chilling for a moment. He doesn't want me to go swimming because it's sprinkling... if it were thundering/lightning I'd understand; but, he's also not 100% and has offered to watch over me whilst I practice. I won't go in alone. In fact... other than walking I'd rather not do anything alone. Age has caught up with me and I just have to be flexible and kind to myself.

*Poseyv*29 กรกฎาคม 2566*Poseyv*

Grey start to the day. 79 degrees and damp. The beginning of a week with rain. 89/77 forecast for the week; better than glaring sun and 90s. Doors are open except for the bedroom with the a/c on. I was able to adjust the a/c last week and this is much better but cool air blowing on me isn't good and my mouth dries out. The normal daily steam-bath is better for my skin and as long as I don't exert myself or stand out in the sun I'm okay.

Life is a tad boring at the moment. I do my routines and I'm writing a tad more; but, my mind wanders, and that's not always good. Woke up to a familiar nightmare this morning. Soooo... not good.

*Checkv* PorP. "Playing hide-and-seekOpen in new Window. private, needs editing. "Morning glories [73d.zm] 39w J17 'grow'Open in new Window.
*Checkv* bogs. Stik/Judith/Harlow
*Checkv* exor. 400/200/200/400 = 1.200; 11:00-11:26 79 degrees.
*Checkv* obsv. yellow leaves, few flitters, breeze, puddles, sprinkles, fairly quiet, slippery; white trumpets sag, their crenulated finery transparent after the rain, leaf fall, flower fall, after the rainfall, I slide across the slippery pavement.
*Checkv* news. Nothing new.
*Clock2* เที่ยง. 82 degrees *Cloud*

I ate coconut curry, mushrooms, glass noodles over rice (very good) but had to lay down. I'm exhausted.

*Checkv* ss&s.
*Checkv* face.
*Checkv* blog. "Dutch raspberries? Open in new Window.

*Checkv* walk.
*Checkv* shop. cocoa, sweet.
*Checkv* pool. short; Pan not well.
*Checkv* tv25. Enigma. ep. 3
*Checkv* Common ep.6 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QSgKDw8kjhY

*Poseyb*28 กรกฎาคม 2566*Poseyb*

*Checkb* exor. 300/200/200/300 = 1.000 About 84 degrees and *Cloud* this morning. Too hot when the sun's out.
*Checkb* ss&s.
*Checkb* face. photo of Birdy coffee, market cat.
*Checkb* PorP. "Dragon and Rat. [73c.zm] 40w J16. 'face'Open in new Window.
*Clock2* เที่ยง. 88 overcast degrees with a breeze. *Clouds*
*Checkb* Thai. routines ep 1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ab-7F54b0dQ&t=29s ...useful & delightful.
*Checkb* bogs. Nikola/Annette/Whirls
*Checkb* blog. "Navy blue day, Zmitri, not baby-blue, Bunny.Open in new Window.
*Checkb* Muse.

2125220 Prompt 1.

They were traveling the peaceful seas, Zmitri
but the fire in my stomach — and the ice in your craw,
began to rumble as the waters began to churn.
Those who survived our tantrum spoke of mythical
creatures at the edge of a flat earth.
But it was never flat, was it? And when the molten core
meets the leaden skies the waters cannot calm
Earth's inner torment, nor ours. I wanted you; you wanted...
anyone else. I needed your ice to put out my flame.
The seething seas were not amused. Was I to blame?
Orion witnessed this wondrous event and invited us to join him
Among the Plieides we found a new home, stirring up the cosmos,
still ice and fire amusing each other in the chase.

2295490 Prompt 1.

Urban fantasy. The jacaranda was swaying aloft. Nothing to note at this time of year. One flower fluttered to the pavement where Ping picked it up. He smiled until it turned bled purple and left a mark on his palm. Something to note. He went to the nearest washroom to his hands and glanced in the mirror. The pale image wavering back glowed an odd shade of indigo, turning a deeper purple, before he blacked out.

*Checkb* news. In one word... T***P... again. In two words? Typhoon Doksuri lands in China. Thailand? H.M. King Maha Vajiralongkorn birthday.
*Checkb* walk. on the other (east) side of the tracks.
*Checkb* foto.
*Checkb* shop. banana, malago, onion.
*Checkb* pool. the pool is about 10m wide and I was able to cross it twice without problems.
*Checkb* tv25. Be My Favorite. Script is complex, w.o. subtitles I get lost, but the acting is good.
*Checkb* ytBL. Home School ep. 15. Extremely disturbing. No light in the darkness. It will get worse...

*Poseyo*27 กรกฎาคม 2566*Poseyo*

"All is not lost" a prompt from Chicago for "The One-Line Lyric Challenge"  Open in new Window. by Anni Pon Author Icon

*Checko* exor. 200/100/100/300 = 700 very warm. Finished late.
*Checko* ss&s. Note: I have no energy, physically nor mentally. I'm sucking on fumes.
*Checko* bogs. Annette/AnniPon/Tracker
*Checko* blog. "Rethinking routines... too much, too little, distracting? Open in new Window.
*Clock* Mostly sunny, breezy 34°C 94°F at 14:00.
*Checko* PorP. "Distortion [73b.zm] 38w 'image' J15Open in new Window.
*Checko* ytBL. AiLongNhai https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5u67yutflQU
*Checko* Thai. eat (review) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OiR6ErzltdM
*Checko* walk.
*Checko* foto.
*Checko* วิดีโอ. Chinese Cultural Center.
*Checko* shop. ice cream, mushrooms
*Checko* rose. old rose
*Checko* news.
*Checko* face. photo of Pan.
*Checko* tv25. Home School.
*Xo* pool. Pan had a stomach ache.

Overly warm day. May be why I didn't feel perky. Anywho... I took it easy.

*Gemg*26 กรกฎาคม 2566*Gembl*

*Checkg* exor. 200/100/150/250 = 700 (swing,sway,swirl,cycle); 81 degrees at 11:01.
*Clock2* เที่ยง. 30°C 86°F; Precipitation: 4%; Humidity: 77%; Wind: 8 km/h. Afternoon should be sunny.
*Checkg* bogs. Shar/Smee/DaveRyan
*Checkg* blog. "p.o.v. of moles, birds, butterflies; girdles and book coversOpen in new Window.
*Checkg* ss&s.
*Checkg* PorP. "Love bugs [73a.zm] 'love' 40wOpen in new Window.
*Checkg* Muse.
*CheckG* shop. Eggs! Not quite a walk though.

*Checkgr* pool.
*Checkgr* tv25. Home School.

The ants act excited, it's a cotton-puff day. It's their last, but they don't know it. I zig-zag the chalk that will shorten their lives; and, ask myself, what will lengthen mine? It's ninety degrees and I wilt as the taro fields look weary. But the ants seem excited. Am I jealous of their ignorance. Am I too spent to care?

Pannya is having a 'rest day'. It's warm but breezy with the windows and doors open. I'm just practicing breathing. I've been short-of-breath and I don't know what will help with that. I've mentioned this to Pannya as it's important when I'm trying to swim. I could go farther if I could hold more breath. I also panic. But I am getting better in the water. Time to get a mask (and eye goggles) and ask everyone as someone might know a solution. When I have had enough I sit in the shallow kid's section and practice floating, breathing or just relaxing looking up at the stars. The pool is good for my skin, in spite of the chlorine. My feet are looking much better. A nice warm "bath"... does things for me that a hot shower can't.

Pannya wants to swim at 7 p.m. That's a good hour... most days. I must say that my routines are helping me emotionally, physically and otherwise. I should tweak them but frankly? I'm a tweaker, so I needn't worry. My list gets longer or shorter depending on my mood and circumstances. Some days I'm just doggy-paddling. And that's okay.

They damned me to hell, never asking me whether that's where I wanted to go. They said I could be saved by ritual and confessions of faith; but, rituals are mere motion if not backed by belief, and confessions would expose my secrets. My mother kept the secrets and I feared her reality more than mere man-made fiction.

*Poseyp*25 กรกฎาคม 2566*Poseyp*

*Checkp* exor. 500/250/250/500 = 1.500 Yes, I can do this but 1.200 is a better level for now.
*Checkp* ss&s.
*Checkp* face. photo of flower.
*Checkp* news. privilege is not being charged for posting illicit photos, MTG...
*Clock2* เที่ยง. 86F 30C degrees.
*Checkp* bogs. Intuey/Elle/Robert
*Checkp* blog. "Cars, ADS, BLs, Mercury and Me.Open in new Window.
*Checkp* PorP. "A Republic... if you can keep it. [72] J13 39w 'democracy'Open in new Window.
*Checkp* wash. Pan does a big wash.
*Checkp* Thai. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ITcORbfjYAU How to use "bàeb(แบบ) & yàang(อย่าง)"
*Checkp* walk. pizza with David.
*Checkp* chat.
*Checkp* pool.
*Checkp* tv25. "Jungle"

*Poseyy*24 กรกฎาคม 2566*Poseyy*

*Checky* exor. 400-200-200-400. 09:39 75 degrees.
*Checky* obsv. Girl playing, squad of butterflies, hummer-moth, spent white trumpets (last night's rain) katydid, last orange flowers aloft, a breeze, sun peeking in-and-out.
*Checky* ss&s.
*Clock2* เที่ยง. 87°F 31°C; Precipitation: 61% chance... hopefully it'll rain; Humidity: 71%; Wind: 5 mph.
*Checky* PorP. "Miss Martha Louise [71] J12 40w 'root'Open in new Window.
*Checky* walk.
*Checky* chat.
*Checky* bogs. Neil/Intuey/Sara
*Checky* news.
*Checky* face.
*Checky* ytBL. Home School ep. 14 "Revenge"
*Checky* pool. s.o.b. spent time in the wading pool. Not a good day.
*Checky* tv25. The Jungle. Dark, seems shallow. May be worth watching for the actors in new roles.

Forty forty FORTY

07/24/2023-'root' Martha Root traveled the world, toting hat boxes and luggage to meet Queen Marie of Romania. She was rootless but not ruthless. She was a champion of a cause.
07/25/2023-'democracy' You voted? Nah... Why? Why bother? They're coming for your brother you know. Take him. And they have eyes on your sister. Let them.
07/26/2023-'love' I beckon your lips. I caress your hips. What do butterflies know of love beyond the sip of nectar, Zmitri? Do they share kisses or embrace in a hug? Are they merely bugs...
07/27/2023-'image' A breeze ripples the water, distorts the reflection of the lily. Your voice echoes in my mind and your image wavers with lost time. Zmitri, I miss you.
07/28/2023-'face' On the face of it, I've faded, Zmitri. The fire in my belly has become a dying ember. But I'm still a Dragon in love with a Rat. Fire in love with Water.
07/29/2023-'grow' Intertwined the vines grow together reaching new heights, ropes turning leaves to the distant sun, flowers nourishing bees. And what of these? Two lovers hugging Zmitri? It should be you and me.
07/30/2023-'emotion' Your cool depths betray no emotion. Your surface remains un-rippled. I would drop a pebble into your frozen puddle, Zmitri, to let you know that I've visited.
07/31/2023-'enthusiasm' Galaxies swirl in a dance, suns mere eddies on the stream of cosmic consciousness, the rock we sleep on provides respite from the never-ending enthusiasm engulfing us. Rest, Zmitri, tomorrow I leave.

7616
July 17, 2023 at 4:30am
July 17, 2023 at 4:30am
#1052702
(exercise) = Exor. (observations) = obsv. (s***,shave,shower) = ss&s. (read something) = read. (comment blogs) = bogs. (BoyLove series on-line) = ytBL. (Thai TV BL series on GMMTV25) = tv25. (write poetry or prose) = PorP. (take a daily walk) = walk. (buy something) = shop. (take a photo) = foto. (video) = วิดีโอ. (speak Thai/Lao) = pôod. (learn Thai) Thai. (go-in-the-water) = pool. (clothes) = wash. (cook something) = cook. (tidy up) = mess. (travel) = trip. (noon) = เที่ยง. (talking to ex-pats/travelers/strangers in European) = chat. (Thai teaching book) = book.

23 กรกฎาคม 2566

*Checkr* exor. 400-200-200-400. 10:01-10:29 77-82 degrees.
*Checkr* QotD.

A list of 5 from least to worst:
         5. Having a gun (real or fake... never knew) put to my head. I was cool and collected.
         4. Being forced to drive to the border (I stopped at the precinct instead). I was mindful and focused.
         3. Waking up to someone in my room standing by my closet. I was screaming and hysterical.
         2. Being caught in a riptide, Cahuita, 1974 whilst I was walking alone. I was terrified and panicked!
         1. A couple events from my childhood I cannot remember. I still am frightened of heights/edges and despise birthday parties.

Trauma is never what happens. It's how the body reacts. Being homeless triggered traumas and was traumatizing in itself. I have a whole list for that and other events. My high-anxiety and deep-depression stem from those. I'm actually doing much better these days.

*Clock* เที่ยง. 82 degrees *Clouds*
*Checkr* ss&s. Put extra lotion on my nose and ear. Skin issues.
*Checkr* bogs. Jennifer/Mouse/Elizabeth/Teresa
*Checkr* Thai. Review of bpai/maa (go/come)
*Checkr* PorP. "Duality [70] 40w J11 'unit'Open in new Window.
*Checkr* ytBL. Home School ep. 13. The drama was intense.
*Checkr* face. foto of lily.
*Checkr* news.

Re deSantis' Florida: "Another Reddit poster chimed in, “First, they will drive out the trans families and gay-accepting families. Next, they will drive out liberals and democrats. Next, they will drive out any minorities who are able to move away. Finally, when everything is just white, they’ll drown due to the climate change they don’t believe in.”"

*Checkr* shop. rice, soap, greens
*Checkr* pool. met Pookie, Pienneung
*Checkr* pôod. a little.
*Checkr* วิดีโอ. posted.
*Checkr* tv25. "Hidden Agenda" seems to be just another rom-com.

"...or when you die even the worms will reject you."

22 กรกฎาคม 2566

Crash, boom, splash. It rained overnight.

*Checkv* exor. 400/200/200/400 = 1.200 84 degrees 09:13-09:38. spoke to Tom.
*Checkv* ss&s.
*Checkv* bogs. Stik/Tim/Steph/Hooves/Petra
*Checkv* jour. page 5384-5385.
*Checkv* PorP. two in my journal and "Improper? [69] 39w J10 "improper"Open in new Window.
*Clock2* เที่ยง. Hot. 91 degrees at 13:10.
*Checkv* foto. Hour long photo session with Pan. He needs to understand that as a photographer I think of color, texture, composition, his placement (as an object), lighting... his wants/needs are secondary while I'm shooting. Otherwise, he's just wasting my time. He mostly cooperated and we may have taken over 100 photos; so, I hope he finds one he likes.
*Checkv* face.
*Checkv* news.
*Checkv* blog. "Integration... of working, playing, stayingOpen in new Window.
*Checkv* tv25. Enigma.
*Checkv* pool.
*Checkv* walk.
*Checkv* shop. Ground chicken and pork.

To Mary Martin Arnold on fb: "OMG... that is spot on! I remember Brandon... very violent alcoholic. In getting to know him I realised that drugs and alcohol were his meds. His severe depression was one of his main problems."

21 กรกฎาคม 2566

Hotter day today. 88 degrees going on 2 p.m.

*Checkb* exor. 400/200/200/400 = 1.200 It would be nice to do this everyday. 77-81 degrees at 09:38.
*Checkb* obsv. Stationary butterfly = pic. "Dreams of Butterflies"? Green roots of the orchid. Saw a huge 25 cm+ yellow black butterfly but wasn't ready to take video. When I was ready it was high up in a tree. Underside was bright yellow as was its body. I thought it was a bird at first.
*CheckB* face. Posted butterfly pic. "Lime butterfly".
*Checkb* news. Thailand...
*Checkb* ss&s. Late.

s.o.b. ... c.o.p. = short-of-breath ... change-of-position.

*Checkb* bogs. Sonali/Tracker/Robert.
*Checkb* walk.
*Checkb* shop. soap, nam jim.
*Checkb* PorP. "Mother sang solo [66] J9 40w "music"Open in new Window.
*Checkb* pool. I swam a bit but short-of-breath. Need to work on endurance and breathing.
*Checkb* tv25. Be My Favorite.

I'm really worn out... again and again. Kissinger visits China at age 100. I'll be amazed if I last until 80. I'd like to... and certain choices on my part are helping. But, I'm just worn out. Moving to SiSaKet would be another yearlong commitment... possibly 4 years.

I should write about "A difference a July makes". Last year was brutal and Bry and Angie helped get me through it. This year Pan is helping in ways he's prolly not aware of. I'm doing better, just super worn out.

20 กรกฎาคม 2566

*Checko* bogs. Maravilla/JimD/Neva

To Neva: "The notion of letting my imagination ... follow the migration of my wandering muse speaks strongly to me."

*Clock* เที่ยง. 81 cloudy degrees. *Cloud*
*Checko* exor. 300/200/200/400 = 1.000 Not as tired today.

*Checko* Muse. Grey pall and the pity of it all, preying for rain like a lonely lion wanting showers to wash away the ennui, a daily refrain in Paradise, now paved and packaged.

*Checko* ss&s. Cut my toenails.
*Checko* face. Posted pic of "Ducky and the Dragon fruit".

To Erasmus on spacehook: "Of course, one can do this anywhere. I was grateful for the clouds when I worked out this noon. I will be grateful for the rain this week. I'm grateful for rice, baloney, and raisins? Pan cooked for me this morning and the daily hugs and kisses. And today I seem to have control over my bodily functions... that's a nice power to have."

*Checko* news. "2 killed in New Zealand" Should we be scared for the Women's World Cup? Not! "Russia to deem Ukraine-bound ships 'potential carriers of military cargo' from Wednesday eve." A much bigger concern with global food repercussions. And then there's this crap: https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/the-12-oldest-schools-in-oklahoma-have-aged-we... I want to know whether the author has ever been to Oklahoma and whether they have ever heard of the Cherokee Nation which opened schools in 1851. White-washing? Hard for me to say because the author seems to be faceless and could just as easily be sitting in NYC or Paris writing. Or even AI... just saying.

*Checko* PorP. "EttaJames "Something's Got a Hold on Me" [65]40wJ8 'culture'Open in new Window.
*Checko* Thai. wai mai = you okay? can I help? https://www.youtube.com/shorts/ln_s8TsKPLY
*Checko* walk.
*Checko* shop. Red rose for Pan, lotus for merit, fish, carrot, limes.
*Checko* pool. Water felt cold! But it's never below 75 at night... I'm feeling more confident every time.
*Checko* tv25. Home School #8
*Checko* ytBL. AiLongNhai #2 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJl-Lnhybh8

Plah chon (snakehead) tastes really good with malago (green papaya). We could smell it coming down the hall after swimming.

19 กรกฎาคม 2566

Muse or Mojo? My Muse has been nibbling. I have no Mojo.

*Checkg* exor. 200/100/100/250 = 650. I may rethink how I work out. It was 82 degree when I began after 10 and still 82 when I finished at 10:33.
*Checkg* obsv. Weak... black/white flutterby. Spider hiding under the stationary bicycle. Gnats. A bit of sun. A bit of a breeze. Yesterday I took a photo of a branch peeking out under the bench. Today it's gone; the Grim-Shearers have been doing their job.
*Checkg* Muse: Kindness, cruelty, the urge to criminalize, nitpickers. Dualists and their dueling gods, Salvationists, Kintsugi and embracing imperfections, Nitpickers and Perfectionists, Gatekeepers. Cruely and Punishment. To Judith: "The gnats were troublesome but saw a spider (there hides hope).""You can write the perfect essay but you'll never be an Emily D or James Joyce." Yes, spelling and punctuation have their place... behind the Muse and not blocking their creative vision.
*Checkg* ss&s.
*Checkg* wash. I washed out my black long sleeve undershirt... Should do this every day.
*Checkg* BPbp. 138/77 pulse 67 at 11:11.
*Checkg* food. Pan boiled eggs, peeled them then fried them in oil and added pork and greens. Served over white rice.
*Checkg* foto.
*Checkg* bogs. Nikola/Viv/Judith
*Checkg* face. I checked in. I should check in every day but limit it.
*Checkg* news. The same. Check in once per day but limit it.
*Clock* เที่ยง. 86 cloudy degrees.
*Checkg* ytBL. อัยย์หลงไน๋ AiLongNhai. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dNiWCfKR-4w
*Checkg* walk. Saw Vigo.
*Checkg* shop. Lotus... mouthwash and bouillon cubes.
*Checkg* pool. I actually 'swam' a bit without panicking. I'm making progress.
*Checkg* tv25. Home School #7 and part of Wedding Plan The Series แผนการ (รัก) ร้ายของนายเจ้าบ่าว
*Checkg* Thai. verb particles https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b7kJttNs9aM
*Checkg* PorP. "David's a cold embrace [64] 40w J7 'value'Open in new Window.

Merit Badge in Shadows and Light
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Hi K,

Congratulations for winning an Honourable Mention in  [Link To Item #shadows]  with your fabulous poem,  [Link To Item #2279061] . Loved it!

Rachel *^*Heartv*^*
Shadows and Light


To Nikola: "I have experienced the abuse of "we'll vote on it". Don't get me started on "voting" on my basic human rights, code for "we get to justify our dislike of you". Seems to be a popular stance these days. If they refuse the time-off they don't value you as a human being."

Thailand: https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/world/in-thailand-socially-engaged-buddhism-goes-...

18 กรกฎาคม 2566

*Checkp* exor. 300/150/200/350 = 1.000 cloudy, 79 degrees at 09:01; 82 at 09:24. For now, this is an okay level.
*Checkp* ss&s. after exercise instead of waiting.
*Checkp* obsv.
*Checkp* bogs. JoeyC/Wordsmitty/Pumpkin
*Checkp* Thai. Causative 'tam' https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g2CO6yKyUnY
*Checkp* pool. I'm gaining confidence.
*Checkp* foto. beautiful sunset!
*Checkp* PorP. "Nix it, nexit [63] J6 40wOpen in new Window.
*XP* walk.

Saw Tom; a toddler watching me; a low branch of a bush sneaking under the bench, reaching out for the sun; last night's puddles; overcast relief.

Today's puddles reflect the grey sky but provide no crystal ball for tomorrow. If there comes a rain, so be it. A new puddle will reflect the new reality. Just as the puddles of my childhood remain a memory of a mystery.


This week's forecast is 87/75 with rain possible every day. I do prefer the rain. I also find it easier to be outside when it's cloudy. That said, puffy clouds are welcome. A searing sun is not at this time of year.

Merit Badge in Food Cooking
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Food Cooking


17 กรกฎาคม 2566

*Checky* exor. 200/50+100/200/350 = 900 Forced myself. 84 degrees at 09:29
*Checky* obsv.
*Checky* ss&s.
*Checky* walk. University... with Pan. He wants to go to school.
*Checky* foto.
*Checky* shop. with Pan. Dragon fruit, papaya, EGGS!
*Checky* pool. we went down after 7 but there was lightning so we didn't stay in but for a few minutes.
*Checky* ytBL. Enigma.
*Checky* bogs. Katwoman/Sonali/Joy

After 200 'steps' and 50 'swings' I felt weak and had to sit down, so I looked around for movement: butterflies , bugs?, bees? Shadows dappled the smooth pavement (too smooth = slippery when wet), stray thoughts, spare breeze, a large ant, a small one. The roar of jets, silent pale wings aloft (a plane?), the uncertainty of an old realm resisting change. Let my thoughts wander - but back to the workout - and pain. 100 more 'swings' Jet flying low. The sun seems to have shifted the shadows a month after the solstice. 200 'twists', 350 revolutions of the stationary bicycle. It was warm but not too hot.

To Chris Carpenter on FB (friend of Renae): "And that's a poor choice made by penny-pinchers and narrow-minded societies. It won't be that way everywhere. That said, it's a bit late to be fighting this war now. Still worth the effort imho. The Japanese and Cherokee have protected and supported the masters of traditional art forms. That's not enough though... just like heirloom vegetables or artifacts, all ancient knowledge (pre-AI) needs to be valued enough to be kept alive. But we chose money over knowledge, and GenZ and GenAlpha will pay the price with their ignorance bequeathed by the Nouveau Narrow-minded who are gaining power globally."

To Sonali: "Was I deeply in love with my community years ago? Was that why I was generous? And once trust was broken... as I was broken... did my generosity die as well..."

Merit Badge in Ahimsa. Peace Always.
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Thanks,  [Link To User enga]  for supporting my blogging.  *^*Delight*^* 
Peace be with you always!
Ahimsa. Peace Always.


40 words:

07/19/2023-'value' Of what worth the comma? Confusion avoided. And they're, their, and there? Mere grammar. Just correct it. The object can be perfected; but David in marble is a cold embrace. Seek the imperfect among the living and know your worth.
07/20/2023-'culture' The petri dish seemed bland and boring until you arrived...
07/21/2023-'music' My mother loved singing harmony but never truly blended into society or either family.
07/22/2023-'improper' That would be my middle name or me when I'm riled up with rage from your abuse. You chuckle as I make a spectacle of myself.
07/23/2023-'unit' Duality: One. One. One. Zeros and ones. My number is very common but it loses its color, its sound, its flavor when reduced to units of zeros and ones. Call me humanity's better-half twin... if you can count that high. 38

7589
July 11, 2023 at 3:14am
July 11, 2023 at 3:14am
#1052457
(exercise) = Exor. (observations) = obsv. (s***,shave,shower) = ss&s. (read something) = read. (comment blogs) = bogs. (BoyLove series on-line) = ytBL. (Thai TV BL series on GMMTV25) = tv25. (write poetry or prose) = PorP. (take a daily walk) = walk. (buy something) = shop. (take a photo) = foto. (video) = วิดีโอ. (speak Thai/Lao) = pôod. (learn Thai) Thai. (go-in-the-water) = pool. (clothes) = wash. (cook something) = cook. (tidy up) = mess. (travel) = trip. (noon) = เที่ยง. (talking to ex-pats/travelers/strangers in European) = chat. (Thai teaching book) = book.

16 july

*Checkr* exor. 100/50/100/250 = 500. It was 88 and hot at noon. Busy morning.
*Checkr* ss&s.
*Checkr* cook. Rice with squid and pork.
*Checkr* wash. Pan did a big wash.
*Checkr* PorP. "Count me out [180.61] J4 40wOpen in new Window. "Traveler, tourist, toad [180.60] Open in new Window.
*Checkr* bogs. Mousethyme/Sara/Tracker
*Checkr* pool. So thrilled. Light sprinkle. Important for Pan's health.
*Checkr* walk.
*Checkr* foto.

"Personally, I think each contest entry should be answered with a comment or a review. Any type of acknowledgement is encouraging.

I renew here at WDC, now in my 18th year, because it was a virtual home when I had none. Writing is cathartic and I improved over time; although, with age and circumstance, I'm now fading.'

I should always carry my notebook. I was in the pool when my Muse spoke about sparrows and sorrows. No memory now.

Went to BK in search of the all cheese 'burger'. Maybe elsewhere... not here.

15 july

*Checkv* bogs. NormaJean/MightyJen/Lyn
*Checkv* exor. 300/100/200/400 = 1.000 = very good. 88 breezy degrees at 11:11.
*Checkv* obsv. pesky flies, scarce butterflies and birds, semi-cloudy, breezy, 'not hot', twitter, but generally hushed.

I change position, speed, direction on the 4 station exercise spot by Tower B. I do 'units' of 20, 40, or 50. Today went well. I would like to sustain this level every morning.

*Checkv* ytBL. Homeschool ep. 12
*Checkv* ss&s.
*Checkv* mess. progress.
*Checkv* shop. chicken and squid, coffee, Milo. Plastic bowl.
*Checkv* walk.
*Checkv* chat. David.
*Checkv* tv25. Enigma... very very very dark.
*Checkv* PorP. "Lessons to learn [180.59] J3 38wOpen in new Window.
*Checkv* Thai. Bpai/ma https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gQ6HbV0ZoRo

Pan is home. 7 hour or more bus ride. He ate a little... sleeps. it's 22:11 and we have the a/c on.

I sketched a 'personal essay'. "Traveler, tourist, toad [180.60] Open in new Window. I'll need to edit by 11 a.m. ICT and post to Petra's contest. It is what it is. It was worth an hour of musing. It's 23:24 and the rumble of thunder surrounds me as Pan gently snores.

80°F 27°C and sprinkles at midnight.

14 juillet *CountryFR*

*Checkb* bogs. Nikola/Phyllis/Carloyn/Robert
*Checkb* exor. 250/100/100/250 = 700 It was 88 degrees or so at 10:20. Saw Tom and fledgling mynas.
*Checkb* cook. Rice with carrot, papaya, greens, garlic, eggs and flavor cubes. Took all day but I ate it all.
*Checkb* walk.
*Checkb* foto.
*Checkb* chat. Rick
*Checkb* ss&s. Even though Pan isn't here.
*Checkb* PorP. posted "From the window [66]Open in new Window. to contest.
*Checkb* ytBL. Homeschool #11.

To Nikola on Newsfeed: Nice assortment of animals. Not everyone can get to a zoo or refuge so it's great that there are outreach programs. Children need to connect with the diverse world around them. Books and videos can help connect, but actual presence matters, jmho. Glad you work in a place that allows/encourages this.

To cappucine in her blog: Chicken: "Squawk". Poop.

I have tried to eat less; but, Pan is concerned if I don't eat with him. I suspect it's a cultural insult, so I eat a little of something cheap and simple. He's out-of-town today so I made rice with carrot, papaya, greens, garlic and seasoning. We have pork but I wasn't in the mood.

His work trip is buying second hand clothes and re-selling on social media. Lots of cheap clothes in Thailand. Lots of second hand clothes in Montana too.

I'm not reading books these days. I've focused on learning language and culture. My writing has suffered but I'm not as depressed as I was 2 years ago."


Is this Q? https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2023/07/sound-of-freedom-caviezel-ballard-tr...

Pan mis-messaged me and I thught he was home. I video messaged back to confirm.. He says he comes home tomorrow. Yes, I miss him.

13 july

*Checko* exor. 200/100/100/200 = 600. 09:00 (not hot yet) Weighed myself. 80.0 kg. *Smile*
*Checko* ss&s.
*Checko* walk. Added baht to my phone. Treated myself to an onion pastry.
*Checko* foto.
*Checko* tv25. Home School.
*Checko* bogs. Joy/Whirls
*Checko* PorP.

Pan went to Ubon today. Got up early! Arrived around 3 p.m. He's shopping. This may be good.

Splotch and Shelly. "Splotch hadn't eaten in three days. He nibbled on a toe, avoiding the nail polish. Shelly had always smelled good. She tasted good too. ... Found after wandering for two months, Splotch was skin and bones ... Ted and Letitia hugged him. He wagged his tail until he caught a glance of the half-empty nail polish bottle. It glared at him."

07/13/2023-'tiny' "So small, like glitter flittering between the flowers. Jojo sat in awe at how tiny flickers of light had gathered by the hundreds. The truck pushed them out of the way. But they gathered again. Safety in numbers. Hoards. He got up to join his friends.
Edited in "Safety in numbers [180.57] 40w J1 "tiny"Open in new Window.

I hope to get back into the daily routines. 12 days in Laos was a nice but expensive break.

07/14/2023-'high' High. Low. Hello? No. Hi? Lo! As in...? "Lo, the nightingale singeth upon the tree..." Oh... that Lo is... Not Lois, not a person named Lo. Oh, Lo is a bird? Nope. "Lo, the Nightingale of Paradise singeth upon the twigs of the Tree of Eternity, with holy and sweet melodies, proclaiming to the sincere ones the glad..."

07/15/2023-'lesson' What can I learn from you? You're sweet. You're kind. You're steam-rolled every day like a rug. I'm harsh. I'm self-centered. I'm a bulldozer. Yes. Need a hug?

07/16/2023-'count' Vampires only count the centuries. Single digits means you're still young. Are you a teenager yet? Look into my eyes and see my vast past... and the short path of your future.

07/17/2023-'myth' Myth Judith wuvs me; this I know. Her witchy friends on me bestow... the ground below my feet that grow, tendrils reaching towards the core, the raven croaking, nevermore.

Midnight: 81°F 27°C; Precipitation: 6%; Humidity: 83%; Wind: 4 mph = a sultry tropical night.

12 july

*Checkg* walk.
*Checkg* exor. 200/50/50/200. Evening.
*Checkg* trip. approx. 10:00 - 16:00
*Checkg* foto.
*Checkg* post. Card sent to Gary from Luang Prabang.

Not enough sleep last night. Drowsy. 2 hour train trip Luang Prabang >> Vientiane was brilliant and comfortable. We caught the bus directly to the border (20.000 kip). No problem at the border. My new visa expires August 10.

I'm worn out. Pan cooked but I have no appetite. Rained. Very gusty and refreshing. Did a short workout. Not much else.

Word: psithurism... wind in the trees.

11 july

WDC: "So many choices; but, let's start with bread. The smell of fresh baked bread reminds me of my grandmother and I'm 7 again. It brings me happiness. I like a crisp crust, a doughy inside, a sweet rye (think Swedish limpa), the thin flatness of lavash, the thicker pita. Add some raisins and cinnamon. What does bread feel like? Soft. If it's hard as a rock it's good for dipping; if it's croutons ... soup; crumbs ... stuffing. Add corn, rice, oats, rye... why not. What does it sound like? A crunch, a child begging, a scream when the ants have found it, a thud when it falls on the floor. How does it move? It has the wings of a raven or the legs of a hungry mutt. And it floats until the ducks or goldfish eye it." I should've added: sweet, sour, spicy, cardboard...

It's a sky blue day as Pannya and I are wearing semi-matching light-blue shirts.

We went to an old wat. This made Pan happy. Took fotos and video. 20k entry/each.

*Checkp* walk.
*Checkp* foto.
*Checkp* วิดีโอ.

Paid for an extra night in Luang Prabang. We both like it. An Austrian mentioned that it reminds him of Graz. I've been to Graz... I see what he means: river, old town, hill.

Graz is European but so is Luang Prabang. A mix of Lao and French culture with more recent Vietnamese. European and Chinese tourists.

Walkable. Beautiful. Vibrant.

10 july

Went to the waterfalls. Long winding trip by mini-van. 250k total for two. Met Wong TianYu from Giulin, China. I went in the water. Very nice but cold and the slippery rocks created problems for me while the fish nibbled. Met a woman from Gent, Belgium, a couple Australians from Sydney, a 21 year old man from Wien who has worked as a volunteer in Viet Nam and Guatemala (I was impressed).

Pannya loved the waterfalls and the pools. Keeping him happy is a priority of mine. We are having problems communicating. Long walk in the evening through the wonderful night market.

*Checky* walk.
*Checky* foto.
*Checky* ytBL.
*Checky* chat.
*Checky* pool.
*Checky* trip.
*Checky* วิดีโอ.
July 2, 2023 at 9:48pm
July 2, 2023 at 9:48pm
#1052045
(exercise) = Exor. (observations) = obsv. (s***,shave,shower) = ss&s. (read something) = read. (comment blogs) = bogs. (BoyLove series on-line) = ytBL. (Thai TV BL series on GMMTV25) = tv25. (write poetry or prose) = PorP. (take a daily walk) = walk. (buy something) = shop. (take a photo) = foto. (video) = วิดีโอ. (speak Thai/Lao) = pôod. (learn Thai) Thai. (go-in-the-water) = pool. (clothes) = wash. (cook something) = cook. (tidy up) = mess. (travel) = trip. (noon) = เที่ยง. (talking to travelers/strangers in European) = chat.

9 juillet 2023

Morning. At least I slept well.

At 08:12: 81°F 27°C; Precipitation: 14% chance; Humidity: 89%; Wind: 0 mph. So: calm, humid, warm, some sun.

At 20:24: 82°F 28°C; Precipitation: 4% chance; Humidity: 82%; Wind: 0 mph.

*Checkr* walk. I couldn't go up the hill. 300+ steps?
*Checkr* foto. Pan took some for me.
*Checkr* wash. Cost 120.000 kip. More expensive than Udon or Missoula.

Didn't get much done because I was tired and Pan napped for hours. Saw Germans we met at Vang Vieng.

8 juillet 2023

Heavy rain overnight but cleared by the time we took the train. Lovely views when we weren't in a tunnel. There shortly after noon.

Shuttle to town was 35k kip. Went to wrong Jasmine, but it was close, 5 minutes. Unfortunately, water issue. Canceled and reserved at Noknoy instead, wh
ich was 2 minutes away on foot. Wonderful part of town with charming alleys, markets, view of Mekong.

Still sick but getting better.

Very difficult evening.

*Checkv* trip. To Luang Prabang. Uneventful.
*Checkv* shop. Bought "lantern".
*Checkv* walk. night markets.

7 juillet 2023

7/7 is fine as long as I don't think about 1977 or 2003.

*Checkb* foto.
*Checkb* trip. Went to Angel Cave with Pannya. He's happy. About 745 baht.

Electricity went out in the morning. We relax in the a/c after our cave walk. Sunny, hot day.

Paid for 5 nights and train tickets to Luang Prabang. Bus is slow and treacherous; slow train is fast.

6 juillet 2023

Hot day. 88 at 16:00. Funeral today. Did stop by. There were hundreds wearing white. I'm still sick.

*Checko* walk.
*Checko* foto.
*Checko* Thai. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k6qn5JvH8uQ
*Checko* bogs. Grace/Neil/Sonali

To huser:innerlight (Grace) in "Entry July 5 2023Open in new Window.:
         The a/c is on and we're barely moving. I've been ill for 3 days. Details? Not a good way to lose weight.
         I'm blessed to be able to breathe the moist air. I prefer Rainy Season to Smoke Season (I'm in Laos).

To huser:neilfury (Neil) in "Replacing Internal Chaos with PeaceOpen in new Window.:
         "Slow. My travel is slow this week. Day 6 in Laos. Sick for 3 days. Pannya wants to do things but Laos is more expensive than Thailand and right now I can't join him. We did get to a funeral today. Two among hundreds.
         The heat didn't help.
         I keep my place in Montana... just in case. My rent in Udon Thani is paid through November. So much for me to consider but today I'm not up for much of anything. Slow is okay for anyone. At my age there are days I'm perky... other days "slow" is as good as it gets."

To huser:eager2write (Elizabeth):
         "I'm disconnected from my "former" life. Nostalgia just saddens me. I tended to be withdrawn and not 'present' so these memories are foggy and a bit disturbing. I need to focus on the present but I'm ill today and Pannya is bored and disappointed. Hard to make new memories at the moment."

To huser:mesonali (Sonali) in "July 5th UglyOpen in new Window.
         Yep. In Thailand it's skin-whitener. Pannya knows I don't care. I can only hope that that helps his self esteem.
         However; in this short-short, I think 'advanced' or 'becoming better' or 'becoming more civilized' may be stronger than 'civilized'.

To Charlotte Holley on FB:
         My posts are photos I took. I usually add place, date and what-it-is. Not to prove anything to others... but to help me remember. Birds? Very hard for me to capture. Flowers? Easy, but the fake photos annoy me to the max. Food... don't get me started."


5 juillet 2023

*Rain* 27°C 81°F; Precipitation: 100%; Humidity: 95%; Wind: 3 mph. at 08:20.

I'm still not well. Pan sleeps. I'll need to ask him about meds, whether he would like to stay here another day (we can), and whether we will venture out today.

*Checkg* walk.
*Checkg* chat.
*Checkg* foto.
*Checkg* วิดีโอ.

Much later... still suffering so I decided I need to eat bread. Easier said than done. But owner gave me a loaf and I found some coconut cakes. Pan is always hungry but I was fine letting him go out alone after I told him what was wrong.

I got wet but not soaked on my search for bread. It didn't rain as much as forecast. Pan checked prices of hot air ballooning and trip to lagoons... very expensive.

         To huser:soledad_moon (Stik) in "The Physicality of the Freeze FrameOpen in new Window. "Nice. Your description brings the place and Dana alive. Of course... how old is Dana? Is she as old as my vampires? Some are a bit stiff. Dana seems limber. And, is she really just a photographer? Yes, I want to know more."
         To huser:eagertowrite (Elizabeth) in "My Fun Fourth of JulyOpen in new Window. "I remember my uncle's birthday. He was born July 4, 1918. We'd go to the shanty which was surrounded by pines and had a pond (I know I was there when it was made). Fat burgers! My mother normally made skinny well-done burgers, but that side of the family preferred juicy, dripping, pink in the middle...
         July 4th wasn't always warm; but, we'd light a fire and we'd sleep on cots wrapped in blankets. Vague memories from long ago."

         To huser:elle (Elle) in "First week and a half of ADHD medsOpen in new Window.: "It takes time... and even then meds oft-times need adjusting. Keeping track isn't silly though. The no-change list will probably get shorter.
         With work... can you tweak the hours? That would've worked wonders for me.
         My daily to-do list isn't being followed on this trip but I'm still more aware than before."


4 juillet 2023

*Checkp* walk.

*Cow* To Lilli: ควายพูดภาษาลาวไม่ค่อยเข้าใจ แต่ฉันมองเข้าไปในดวงตาคู่สวยคู่นั้นและไม่ก

*Checkp* chat. I've been deprived. Today: Germans (4); Dutch (2): French (2) brother/sister from Marseille; L, age 23, from Scotland.
*Checkp* foto. Pan, food, procession.
*Checkp* วิดีโอ.
*Clock2* 27°C 81°F *Rain* at 14:32; Humidity: 95%; Wind: 6 km/h

It rained most of the day. Saw a procession; crossed a bridge and saw two hot air balloons; coughed when I got a whiff of chili.

I have mixed emotions about Vang Vieng. It was a party city and that legacy is still evident in who comes here, what activities and foods are offered. It's a lovely setting but too touristy for me.

I had diarrhea... no need for details, but it made the day difficult.

Merit Badge in Encore! Encore!
[Click For More Info]

 Congratulations on taking  Second Place  in Round 3 of  [Link To Item #2293351] . Your opening line was amazing and haunting quite literally! Fantastic writing! *^*Heart*^* *^*Pencil*^*


To huser:dunkelhetstern (Jessica) on fb: "Missing: instant coffee in a jar (Montana) or individual sachet (Thailand). What it says: 1. I'm cheap. 2. I'm practical. The Truth? I love Ethiopian freshly ground... but that isn't a daily reality."

To huser:annette (Annette) in "WorldForge: Magic - Week 1Open in new Window.: "When I wrote Blood of the Garlic ages ago it was well grounded in the reality of a place (rural outside of Kansas City). The characters, mostly LDVs (V as in vampire), were also normal in most ways (except for their quirks, including longevity). I did this because I wanted a real world with real people, just a different version of reality. Because Twilight was the rage, I avoided any sparkling and werewolves were not mentioned. I also didn't write a horror story!

Fantasy? Perhaps. Magic? Nope. If I were to go that direction in a future story I'd have to work on defining what magic means to me. In looking up the traditional meaning I'd really have to alter my personal belief system to make it work."


To huser:joycag (Joy) in "MissingsOpen in new Window.: "I've missed a lot. Anxiety and depression will do that. A floating fear of making mistakes prevented me from taking risks. I still have no clue half the time what I'm missing.

However, one's choices and mistakes do lead to growth... as you point out."


*Yawn* 27 degrees at midnight.

3 juilliet 2023

"They strolled into the 7-11 in stunning purple spikes. And there you were, a frumpy 6, stuck behind the 8 ball, green with envy."

Up and down to breakfast by 7 in the morning. Pan didn't eat much. I did, because I know he'll be hungry before 11 and the mini-van won't get into Vang Vieng until 2-ish. I plan. Pan just goes with the flow until his stomach grumbles... every other hour.

Met Mr Noy from Luang Prabang this morning. He works in a restaurant, Khaiphaen, that trains "marginalized youth" and lives outside the city.

It rained heavily overnight. Some thunder and lightning but mostly a downpour. I got up to bring hanging clothes in.

A cloudy 26°C in Vientiane at 09:00. Hopefully the weather holds whilst we travel. But... rain forecast in Vang Vieng.

To huser:cappucine (Carolyn) in "Benny Lava Open in new Window.: Well... I don't know whether this is fact or fiction! Regardless, it would be a great way to start a story. Whether this would turn into a romance, gothic horror (psychological mystery?) or Children's story about a cat-like cube would be up to you.

To huser:stoland1999 in "06-26-23 Spring Has Sprung, Here Comes the SunOpen in new Window.: "I'm listening to the downpour in Vang Vieng while Pan snores beside me. We are on an adventure away from home. Home is Udon Thani.

I write that to convince myself that that's the truth. Rain and snores. Ants in the coffee cup. Supper at Oh La La... yep. I'm a creative writer but this is more truth than anything I could ever make up.

Part of me is still in Montana... and in Kansas... and in Costa Rica... and where I grew up.

The emotional, physical, mental tolls? I'm a lot stronger than I ever thought I was."


To huser:nfdarbe (Neva) in "On The First Sunday in July 2023Open in new Window.: "An evening downpour and Pan's soft snores. The noises of this tropical night in a river town guarded by limestone gumdrops.

I'll skip the fireworks. I'm overly sensitive to loud noises, sharp noises, and unexpected booms. Ah... the trauma-gift... I do like the pretty colors though.

I'm in Laos, and hoping my sojourn will be quiet.


*Checky* Trip. Went well and arrived on time.
*Checky* pôod.
*Checky* walk. With Pan.
*Checky* foto.
*Checky* ss&s.

July 1, 2023 at 10:29am
July 1, 2023 at 10:29am
#1051960

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         I could see right straight through her, if I took my glasses off and squinted. *Checkv*
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         They strolled into the 7-11 in stunning purple spikes. And there you were, a frumpy 6, stuck behind the 8 ball, green with envy. July 3 *Checkg*
         The King tried to castle, but the Queen took him out at the knees before he could jump. July 14 *Checkb*
         Speck's tiny stomachs growled. He ran away from the demon and wove a web under the picnic table hoping to grab some crumbs. July 20 *Checko*
         What brought us together in Mexico City's subway will keep us together forever. Super Glue is a curse. July 27 *Checko*


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