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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/books/item_id/1321774-Crazy-Life-o-mine
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Rated: 18+ · Book · Other · #1321774
Just some crazy things that really happen in this life of mine.
Sometimes things in life are just too funny, too serious, too maddening to keep to yourself. This is just my way to keep myself sane and to hopefully let other people know that there is someone else out there with crazy stuff going on.
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Dec 02 2020
December 2, 2020 at 8:18pm
I did it! I finally was brave enough to talk with a neighbor. I know it sounds over-dramatic. But for months I've been socially distancing, like a good Covid-fearing person should do. I have been so religious about being 6 feet apart that I'm not sure my neighbor knows I'm his neighbor. All that does is bring up fears I didn't even know I had. For instance what if he thinks I am some random stranger casing out his place? We talked long enough, in broad daylight, he could giv... [Read more]
Nov 30 2020
November 30, 2020 at 10:06pm
I have friends who think masking up isn't going to help them. I say sure it will- unless you are planning to give it to someone, or maybe are hoping to catch it- in those cases you might be right. Then I have friends who are religious about wearing masks. They are the ones you spot driving their cars with the blue square across the middle of their face. I have friends who think Covid isn't something to worry about, that if they catch it then it must be God's will. I'm pre... [Read more]
April 14, 2020
April 14, 2020 at 9:34pm
I was reading an old blog entry. Um dated Aug 7 2010. It's the one where Lonnie's penis accidentally fell into Reba. And then he started diddling another man's wife. I was waiting for karma to get them all. Here's the update... The wife is now an ex. She got herpes. Apparently she dated a fellow who neglected to tell her that little fact (Don't ask how I know that tid-bit, I have my sources). Reba is still a bar fly. I haven't run across a lot of people who hav... [Read more]
April 4th 2020
April 4, 2020 at 6:15pm
Hello, Yesterday was my birthday. It was a mixed bag of emotions kind of day. I am a bit closer to taking advantage of senior citizens' discounts and choose from their menu. I'm not quite sure if the latter is a good thing...have you seen the size of a Village Inn's breakfast for senior citizens? They're a bit on the skimpy side. I'd have to buy two orders to make one order for me. It would cost about the same as the regular meal and make me look like I have the appetit... [Read more]
March 29. 2020
March 29, 2020 at 1:40pm
I live in the Midwest. So the stay at home order hasn't hit our area...yet. Instead we have Health Mandates. No public gatherings over 10 people, work at home if you can, restaurants and theaters are closed, essential businesses stay open...etc. You all know the rules. I'm dealing with people everyday. I own my tax company. I also work part time at a gas station. It drives me nuts to hear people still saying the virus pandemic is just a flash in the pan...the flu is worse. Okay pe... [Read more]
March 23 2020
March 23, 2020 at 4:03pm
I decided a while ago to let go of the internet. I wanted to give myself time to work on a couple of story ideas and a book, without the distractions that comes with Facebook, Twitter, and Yahoo news. I did not know how life was going to let me do what I dreamed of doing. But I did it. Somehow between buying my first home, attending three high school graduations, starting and ending a ten year relationship, and running my little tax practice I managed to e-publish a romance-y book, and a boo... [Read more]
Sept 15,2010
September 15, 2010 at 10:42pm
So, I'm here, wondering why it is that life is so funny. Guess what I'm trying to figure out is why the ex still gets under my skin. Why can't I just have fun and not give a hoot about what other people think? Why is it the girl he was caught with can be so honest about the whole mess and he can't even tell the truth? Why is it I'm not mad at her and really can't find the anger I need to shove an ice cream cone up his nose? Sometimes I just wish I was some kind of ... [Read more]
sept 6 2010
September 6, 2010 at 9:21pm
Well how do you like that? I'm finally angry. Two freaking months and a few days later I'm finally angry. I'm angry at myself for not seeing the signs before he did what he did. I'm angry he used the "L" word and I was a sucker for it. I'm angry that my supposed friends had to sleep with him. I'm angry that I wasted so much time on him. I'm angry that I was so damned stupid. ANGRY. The good thing about all this anger is that my imagination has gone into ... [Read more]
sept 01 2010
September 1, 2010 at 10:12pm
So, here I am...staring at the wall and wondering why it hasn't answered my question. It's been one of those weeks. It seems that the ex decided it was okay to send a drunk to my house. The drunk was shoving his wife around and I let her stay the night with me so she'd be safe. Unfortunately the ex told the drunk where she was and I ended up calling the cops to get him out of my house. I warned him I was going to. He told me to go ahead...Can you say "Duh"? I ran into ... [Read more]
aug 11 2010
August 12, 2010 at 4:42pm
Sometimes I wish I could close my eyes, open them up, and be living the life I think I should be living. Guess that's not going to happen. I'm still trying to figure out how I got to this point. All I know for sure is that it's up to me to change things.... [Read more]
aug 7 2010
September 1, 2010 at 10:16pm
I went out last night with my friend Tina and her husband. We had a pretty good time. Tom showed up later, and things got interesting. So pay attention as I try to sum up the history of that statement. Lonnie's penis accidentally fell into Reba on several occasions while he was dating me. Dumb-ass me forgave him after he declared he only wanted me. So I spend several months trying to get past the infidelity. Sounds like a good ending to some romance-hallmark station thriller doesn&#... [Read more]
aug 6 2010
August 6, 2010 at 12:38pm
My youngest has decided to use his own mind to create his own path in life. Good for him. I can see him now...pumping gas. Lets just say the last couple of days have been trying. He doesn't want to be in band, but he wants to keep playing his sax. So his bright idea is to go to band practice...then leave without actually doing anything. Then he tells me that he had the best time. Yeh, the best time doing what he wants. Now he gets to be my side 24 hours a day for the next few weeks. No... [Read more]
july 28 2010
July 28, 2010 at 11:05am
I guess I'm a bit cranky. I woke up on the wrong side of the bed, which is crazy because my bed is up against the wall. But I did. I had to have a doughnut for breakfast, because the gas station was out of breakfast sandwiches. And I drove around Elmwood Park trying to find the place I was supposed to drop off a fare, and it turned out I was in the wrong area. Ever notice that when one thing goes wrong it just seems to snow ball from there? Next thing you know I'll get a summons to... [Read more]
july 27, 2010
July 27, 2010 at 6:01pm
I'm a little bit fed up with men. Sometimes they are a bit slow to get a clue, even an obvious one. How much more clear can I be when I ask if he thinks we're ready for a sleep over? I know. What? I starting dating a guy I've known for a real long time. When we started "hooking up", as Recycled Guy calls it, I had already moved past the World's Worst Boyfriend (Don't get me wrong the thought of him still makes me want to vomit and to wish his penis withers away... [Read more]
july 23 2010
July 23, 2010 at 7:43pm
Well, hell I've been single for one month. We all saw it coming...the World's worst boyfriend decided to increase his harem size...need I say any more? But not too worry. I bounced back just fine. I actually have a social life. Who knew it was possible? By the way the electricians decided meth was a better way to go... My tax business is doing just fine.... The taxi company still transports the Jesse James expert who was in a cult but isn't anymore...but now he has some of... [Read more]
July 4th 2009
July 4, 2009 at 1:43pm
The move into the new house has been one thing after another. First the electricians didn't finish the job when they were supposed to and called for the inspector before the job was even done. Luckily the head electrician is a friend of mine and he was willing to come to the house to see what I was talking about. So he got rid of the crew that was working on my home and took it over himself. The inspection was canceled. Good thing. The other team called for it on June 28th, the inspection wa... [Read more]
july 2 2009
July 2, 2009 at 4:00pm
I bought a home. Me. A home. I have been renting the same broken down dump for thirteen years and now I own a home. It had to be re-wired. Trees needed to be removed. A window needed to be replaced. But it's mine now, and the neighbors are thrilled to bits at the chain saws, and the coming and goings of the contractors. The kids weren't too excited about the move until the day of...The cats hated the transfer (I think it was the pet carrier). The dogs were like confused, until they... [Read more]
feb 25 2009
February 25, 2009 at 8:26pm
Life is interesting. I think I should put a cot in my office. I haven't been home too much. I also think tax season has fried my brain and caused my muscles to atrophy. On Monday I took a bath, after waxing the bathroom's vinyl floor. I was stepping out of the tub one minute, and the next I had a grip on the towel rack, one leg still in the tub and wondering why I was staring at the ceiling. Talk about a "Medic Alert" moment... My brain decided that the worst boyfrien... [Read more]
feb 14 2009
February 14, 2009 at 2:44pm
I think this has been one of the most trying weeks of the year. At least for me. Last weekend, my car got into an accident. Notice--my car. I was not driving. My daughter was not driving. In fact no-one in my family was driving. The son of a friend of mine borrowed the vehicle. Based on the police report and the accounts of the passengers there really wasn't much he could do to avoid the accident. It could have been so much worse. No-one had to go to the hospital for anything serious.... [Read more]
01/16/2009
January 16, 2009 at 3:30pm
I have been busy today. I woke up and went to the bathroom (No this is not going to be a detailed report of this morning). When I finished, I stood up, to sit right back down. I had that tingly "Gotta go, gotta go, gotta go, right now!" feeling. Only I didn't have to go. Then there was the burning. My first thought was "Crap!!!" I went to the doctor. Luckily the Dr. was a female. I don't know about you, but trying to convince a guy Dr. that you know what's wron... [Read more]
01/13/09
January 13, 2009 at 3:40pm
It's freezing outside. It's freezing in my office. I knew this was going to happen. I brought my leopard print fuzzy slippers to the office. I also am wearing gloves, a wrap, and have a useless space heater next to me. If it gets too much colder in this old drafty building, I'll put on my coat and stocking cap. I'll look like a cleaned up hobo, but I'll be warm darn it. My son called me from school this morning. His glasses broke. I asked if it was a screw. Nope. It was th... [Read more]
01/12/09
February 14, 2009 at 1:42pm
I'm back. I'm guessing not a lot of people have missed me. That's okay. There really hasn't been a lot to mention. I'm single again, I think. I haven't seen him over 2 months. If he is still my boyfriend and I don't know it, then he's still the worst boyfriend ever. Let's leave it at that. No wait, let's not. He can be good to everyone else. He is letting a friend stay with him--she (yes a she) doesn't have a place to stay. But he can't visit m... [Read more]
October 15, 2008
October 15, 2008 at 6:13pm
Well, I have decided that semi truck drivers who can't judge a left hand turn acurately should go back to truck driving school. Today, at an intersection, stopped behind a stop sign, I nearly became part of the rear tires of an 18 wheeler. Actually, the car I was in would have been a permantment part of his tires and I would have been some sort of gross cream filling. He stopped a few inches from my bumper as I tried to get my car going backward as fast as possible. Thank goodness I di... [Read more]
Sept 22, 2008
September 22, 2008 at 7:20pm
Contract negotiations. I have decided that if I want to get my way I have to a bit bitchy. I don't wear that very well. Door-mat... now that I used to wear real well. Oh yeh. See I bought the tax business back in March. Somehow I fell through the cracks. In August, after not hearing from the franchise, I called them up to see what was going on. Back in July it was an excuse about the corporate offices being re-modeled and I was put into a box somewhere. Joy. When the contract finally c... [Read more]
Sept 15, 2008
September 15, 2008 at 2:56pm
Okay, so it's been a while since I've written anything. A lot has happened. I guess you'll just have to wait until I have more time to update you all.... [Read more]
July 7 2008
July 7, 2008 at 5:13pm
Good God!!! The heat here is enough to make you wish it were February. Now I know Summer is back. The fourth of July was good--if you like doing nothing. Really. I did nothing. Someone else cooked. Someone else lit the fireworks. Someone else watched the fireworks. All I did was sit on my butt. Easiest holiday I ever enjoyed.... [Read more]
june 18 2008
June 18, 2008 at 6:20pm
I have the worst boyfriend EVER! He used to be the best. Now he's not even average. My oldest son ran over my youngest son's ancient pogo stick while mowing the lawn. I can't be too mad at him, after all the grass was as tall as my knees and the sun was setting over the horizon. And in all fairness the bright orange metal pogo stick was easy to run over twice... The mower was vibrating real bad and I needed to know if I could keep using it or if I should buy a new one. My me... [Read more]
June 9, 2008
June 9, 2008 at 6:24pm
I think I missed Spring somewhere. We've been in the 60's (temp-wise) for the last two months. We've had more than enough rain to make up for three droughts. Now all of a sudden it's in the 90's. I'm telling you I missed Spring. I'm pretty sure I missed the start of Summer too. Yuck--it feels like the dog days of August. Life has been treating me real good. I've been cleaning up after the kids every time I turn around. My boyfriend, I can't recall his na... [Read more]
May 31, 2008 part 2
May 31, 2008 at 12:09pm
Oh I forgot to mention...My Jesse James fare. He has edited the article the magazine sent back. He's going to resubmit it. I also learned that he was a college professor. So maybe there is something to what he is trying to tell me. I think he had a stroke or heart attack recently. As I learn more I'll let you know. My newest character that I drive....Un-gloryified Gloria. This woman is so negative it is hard to keep a fake smile on your face. She was in the middle of a rant...when I g... [Read more]
May 31, 2008
May 31, 2008 at 11:54am
Does anyone really want to know what's been going on in my life? Hmmm....This whole month of May has been nuts. Tax Season got over with, started driving the taxi...the other job (the one with Carla and the boss with no-name) needed me to fill in for Leena going on her vacation. Trish was glad that I was filling in, probably because she's tired of listening to "Sex according to Carla". Apparently it's a daily show. Trish comes to work and it's already playing (Uh f... [Read more]
may 8, 2008
May 8, 2008 at 10:51am
Yesterday was a very stressful day. I was supposed to have the morning off from driving taxi so I could get laundry done. HAHAHAHA. That didn't happen. I'm clinging to the hope that these next few days, as I prepare for my daughter's graduation, that he will hold to his promise to call an hour before he needs me. My last pick-up yesterday..I got lost. I missed my turn. I called the dispatch, told them my street location and that I knew I missed my turn a few blocks back. Thing is,... [Read more]
may 3 2008
May 3, 2008 at 3:41pm
For the fun of it I decided to drive a taxi, part-time during the off season. I have run across a Jesse James historian who was involved in the digging up of Jesse and testing the mitocondrial DNA of the corpse to some relative. I take this guy to counseling. He suffered a stroke a while back. He used to be involved in a cult, a week ago he was an atheist, and this week he believes in the psychic predictions of Sylvia Brown. Today he is going to finish his paper on why the guy who took al... [Read more]
apr 14 2008
April 15, 2008 at 7:30pm
okay. okay. I've got to get myself in that state of mind where the zen and the yang and the life center is all one. Yeh. Right. Trish got married this weekend. Tax season robbed me of the joy of celebrating. I spent my entire weekend filing taxes and sleeping, except to go to her wedding. I was too tired to stay for the entire reception. And that's probably a good thing. As I watched the bouquet toss, I was thinking, if it hits someone in the eye then they should keep the medic... [Read more]
april fool's 2008
April 1, 2008 at 5:24pm
Well...Life. Sometimes I think the whole thing is a practiacl joke. My baby sister had to prove she's an American citizen. She was born in Germany--I was born in England, our dads were in the military. I guess Mom liked to travel...I think she was a little bit on the guy crazy side too. I also think that she didn't know it was not the right thing to do to pack up and travel with another man who wasn't her husband.... Real long story. Anyway, my sis has been working governmen... [Read more]
March 21 2008
March 21, 2008 at 3:57pm
Hi everyone. Well I opened up the business account. That was an enjoyable experience. Half the time I stared at a wall as the bank gal tried to figure out how to set up the account. The other half of the time I was correcting her mistakes and wondering if I was making a mistake. By the time I left the bank I felt emotionally drained. I had this starter checkbook thing and a bunch of papers that said I could deposit money with them. Shouldn't it have taken less than an 1.5 hours to open... [Read more]
March 1, 2008
March 1, 2008 at 12:52pm
Good gravy!!! It's a Saturday. The weather is nice. I'm stuck in the office. Yeh, I'm earning money. Yeh, I'm helping people. But wouldn't it be nice to just go outside and soak up some skin cancer? ... [Read more]
Feb 25, 2008
February 25, 2008 at 5:11pm
This weekend we were all acting like it was spring. Today the snow is coming down hard and idiots are out crashing into another. Come on this is the mid-west. We all know Winter isn't over until summer arrives.... I had a strange dream last night. Probably a nightmare, since I woke up saying it wasn't going to happen. I keep trying to remember the dream but it evades me. It is like it's just sitting on the edge of recall but it won't come to me. Hate that. Trouble is usually t... [Read more]
Feb. 22, 2008
February 22, 2008 at 11:02am
Good morning everyone. Sun-shiny day...that song is stuck in my head. Thank God no-one else is in the office today or they'd be treated to my singing voice. Tax season is slowing down a bit. All the people who want the rapid refunds have dissappeared. Now it's the people who dread filing (they are so positive they owe money to Uncle Sam), who are coming in. Funny thing about that....out every 100 returns I do, maybe two people owe money to the gov. And it's not a lot. So I told... [Read more]
Feb 16 2008
February 16, 2008 at 10:01pm
Yeh yeh...Happy Valentines Day. I remembered to send out cards...on the 14th, around 7pm. I kept looking at these pink and red envelopes with matching cards, wondering whether or not I should keep them until next year. I got ready to set them aside, when I recalled I had a box of cards I was going to use "next year". Wouldn't you know it, there's a lot of Valentine Day cards in that box. I'd guess the value to be at least $45. Next year, I'll send out the "saved... [Read more]
feb 02, 2008
February 11, 2008 at 4:35pm
Welcome to a new month. Tax season was killing me for a while, everyone wanting their money yesterday and what-not. Now it's slowed down a bit. This is the time when the "complicated" returns start showing up. Of course everyone is worried about their receipts and if they have enough deductions. This weekend I went out. I was a bit naughty. Well for me it's naughty. I decided after two weeks straight of working, I needed to unwind. Boy did I ever. I colored my hair, I wore ... [Read more]
Jan 21, 2008
January 21, 2008 at 4:12pm
Happy freezy Monday to you all, and for those who get to celebrate MLKjr day...Lucky you. My Packers lost. Enuf about that... I work as a tax professional. I don't think I mentioned that earlier in a blog. So during the down time, with the computer in my face almost all day long, I might get more blog entries in. Love working for myself... Maybe I mentioned the job with the other girls...of course I did. Anyway, "the boss" went out and bought himself a new toy. Usually he bu... [Read more]
Jan 15, 2008
January 15, 2008 at 10:51am
Holy macaroni and stuff. So, I'm dating a real nice guy who had a shady background...like there aren't a few of them out there, right ladies? I've dated him before, and he just sort of dissappeared on me. On New Year's Eve, he came back. Well I ran into him at a local bar. I was getting ready to leave. He asked to talk with me. I was feeling jovial. And the next thing I know he's apologizing for dissappearing. He misses me. He wants to try again. I was going to be ... [Read more]
December 24, 2007
December 24, 2007 at 2:54pm
Hi. This is for my friend X-ine....otherwise I wouldn't put an entry in today. I did manage to get all my Christmas shopping done. I have to tell myself that. If I don't, I'll head back out to face the crowds of anxious shoppers searching for just one more gift. As it stands right now, it looks like my tree has exploded X-mas everywhere. Things at work are still the same. Carla still thinks that it's appropriate to discuss her sex life in pornographic detail to Trish. Tr... [Read more]
November 6, 2007
November 6, 2007 at 8:27pm
I've been wondering...who's idea was it to start the holiday shopping push this freaking early? I used to be real proud of myself when I had everything bought by the beginning of December. Now, I find I am running behind. I just started, getting the big presents for the kids...you know? But, I have 2 friends who are completely done with with X-mas shopping. I don't get it. ... [Read more]
October 23, 2007
October 23, 2007 at 8:59pm
So what is new? I have decided that life is just too funny. First of all it's been the wettest October in Nebraska's history. My roof can attest to that. So can my bedroom. The ceiling is ready to fall down. See, I rent from a slum lord. The roof neefs to be fixed, has needed it for a few years. Each time I bring it up....there's a song and dance about finances or it'll get fixed before the next rains or it's too wet to work on it now. I moved my bed to the office. So much... [Read more]
October 12 2007
October 12, 2007 at 1:00pm
I can't decide if I should be stunned or on a rampage right now. Things at work have gotten to the point where I know I need to get out of there.... [Read more]
October 2, 2007
October 2, 2007 at 5:34pm
I wish there was something high level trauma type thing that I could tell you about...but there isn't. ... [Read more]
September 28 2007
September 28, 2007 at 1:40pm
Oh my God!!!!! Have you ever just wanted to curl up into a tight ball and pretend the rest of the world doesn't exist? That's where I'm at today. Remember I mentioned the friend who had a ghost that she wanted gone? Well I'm beginning to suspect she was hallucinating. Oh, sure, go ahead and laugh. I feel like it. I mean any other sane person would have just told her that they don't believe. But, NOOOO. I'm not like that (real heavy on the sarcasm here). I be... [Read more]
September 25, 2007
September 25, 2007 at 10:07am
Life is just a bowl of cherries. It's one of my favorite sayings. Trish expects me to say it at least once during a conversation. For me the phrase encompasses the good and the bad. Even the bad can become something good. I firmly bellieve that. Trish says, yes ir's a bowl of cherries. Some are tasty. Some aren't. Some are firm, some are mushy. The rotted ones attract annoying fruit flies and leave a sticky mess at the bottom of the bowl. I say, the rotted ones can be tossed ... [Read more]
September 24, 2007
September 24, 2007 at 1:33pm
Holy cow. I've decided I have some very trying friends. Not in a bad way, but in a way where you never know what's coming next. Carla, she's the friend I have known the longest, is going through some kind of second childhood. She wants to go out, she wants to be able to see who she wants, when she wants, and still have a boyfriend. Okay, maybe it's a mid-life crisis. All I know is I'm trying to figure out why she does the strange things she does. I guess you would like... [Read more]

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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/books/item_id/1321774-Crazy-Life-o-mine