This is a record of our journey toward healing for our adopted son. He is a victim of severe neglect and abuse from birth to age three. He came to us, at that time, as a foster child. A year later, we adopted him. We knew he had serious problems, but we had no idea the cause or the cure. We only knew that, if we did not adopt him, he would spend his life "in the system" and end up as a criminal. Later, when we did learn the source of his problem behavior, we shuddered at what we were told. Many of these children go untreated and become the Ted Bundys and the Jeffery Dahmers of the world—literally. We had no idea we were rescuing him from such a horrible destiny. We only knew we loved him. My mission is to tell the world about this terrible disorder that affects so many foster and adopted children. This journal is a record of our struggles to find the solution to his behavior problems, our many failures before finding the name of the disorder, and our journey of healing. These entries will be, in large part, reports I have written for each therapy session so that the therapist will know how our week has been. Our wonderful hero/therapist is Dr. Susan B. Corbin. For more information on Attachment Disorder please visit http://www.ATTACh.org
So I'm thinking that "Coach" is the new therapist? You appear to have learned a LOT, and you may have the tools in hand to begin putting Tony on a firm road to some kind of productive life. I shdder to imagine what you guys have been through. Is James your husband? Also I so identify with your not having the energy to do someone elses part for them. God bless. Bob
What a great journal, Pat! This is going to be invaluable, perhaps for others too. I kept a personal journal of my Alzheimer's journey with Marg. I printed it and put it in the hands of people who might benefit from it. That was a good experience for me. It's also in my port.
This is my first glance at your blog. From here, I will go to the bottom and seek to get a “handle” on the story of Tony. I know you guys will still have some “stormy days” ahead. But what a total joy to have the sun shining so brightly today! Bob
So so very good to read this chapter in your story with Tony. Brought happy tears to my eyes. For you and for him. What a wonderful life he has ahead of him for having found the mother and father he so desperately needed to love and guide him.
Pat, I cannot tell you how happy I am to read this journal post! I was wondering about your handle, and had even considered emailing you – had you not been so busy with SAJ I would've. Now I am so happy for you and your son.
Fight the good fight! Carry the flag! Run the race! Your reward will be in Heaven.
I know this is an older post, but just in case you are having moments like this still, this is for you. I love you, Pat. I love you like a compassionate human loves another compassionate human. I love you for what you have done for your kids and the price you pay each day. I love you for giving yourself so selflessly to others. I also love you for recognizing that you can't give it all. You have to have something to yourself. So, when you need to smile, just think about your friends at WDC who love you and think you are courageous and who are glad to share a planet with you. If you ever need ANYTHING or even just want to vent, please do not hesitate to lean on me.
Sincerely,
Patrick
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Touching, Pat. When Tony opened up to you, I teared up. I do that sometimes, for I am a mommy and a daddy. And a Pisces. I can be a ball-baby sometimes!
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