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a journal |
 This book is intended as a place to blog about my life and things I'm interested in and answers to prompts from various blog prompt sites here on WDC, including "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS"  and "Blog City ~ Every Blogger's Paradise" I'm not sure yet what it'll turn into, but I'm going to have fun figuring it out. |
| "I have a writing addiction." Prince Do you feel like this? Write anything you want about this. Absolutely, I feel like this. Addiction is something that you feel like you have to do, often at the sacrifice of other things in life. It consumes me, much as other addictions consume, filling days and dreams and the edges of existence, like dust in the corners, creeping into the rest of the room. It colors my relationships because as I interact with people, I find myself catching pieces of conversation or mannerisms, bits of other people's lives--things that I can turn into story. Now, I have to say that for many people addiction is something that is meant to be fought. We have a great many mechanisms in place to try and fight addictions to alcohol, drugs, sex, eating, gaming, pornography . . . there are so many different kinds of addictions and so many people and ways to seek help with those addictions. I suppose that I could look for help. They could cure me and I would never want to write again. But I don't want to be cured. I am perfectly content being addicted to the written word. I like writing. I like that my life is surrounded by stories. |
| What do you think about people who magnify little things, such as blowing small mishaps out of proportion instead of taking a step back and looking at the issue objectively? Have ever blown anything out of proportion? I find I have very little patience with melodrama. I remember when I was in high school, there was a couple who spent their time getting together and breaking up and hurting each other and living on the very edge of their skins--but it always felt as though they were not really serious about it--they thought that love and life should be like a soap opera, so they arranged it so it would be. It was exhausting. I know that the question is more complicated than that. For example, there are people who magnify out of humorous effect. I do it myself to some degree. I kind of like that. There are also times when some small act, something that no one else notices or thinks anything of becomes tremendous. Okay, I have an example of that from my own life. I'm the oldest of six, so when everyone was at the dinner table, there were eight of us, and as one of the older ones, I helped fill plates, especially for the very little ones. One day (I was feeling hormonal and I was about sixteen, just to give some perspective) I was standing and pouring milk for everyone. And then I sat. And I burst out crying. I didn't know why at first, but when they asked me what was wrong, all that came out was that no one ever poured milk for me. Sometimes, I think, it's easier to look at something little and complain about it than to face the bigger things we all have to. I am always going to complain if I do something little like get a splinter or stub my toe, but when I'm really injured or in pain, there's no room in my life for anything but the focus on pain. I remember a friend of mine--we'd just gotten to camp and she broke her arm (while we were setting up things). She sat and started laughing with the rest of us standing around, trying to help but she didn't let anyone do anything. A splint and a ride to the ER--not even any pain killers because if we gave her some, they wouldn't give her the good stuff (as she put it). In other words, I've learned that when we see something who (we think) is magnifying things out of proportion, we should be the ones taking that step back to see what the bigger thing is. Never assume that something we know is a little splinter isn't bigger to someone with smaller fingers. And if someone is exhausting us with melodrama, maybe it's time to step away and let someone else be the audience. |
| What did you get in trouble for the most when you were younger? I actually didn't get into much trouble as a child. I read a lot and got good grades and didn't do anything to self destructive. I'm the oldest of six and we're a close family. I watched my younger brother and sisters, although I did end up torturing them in the way that most older siblings end up torturing younger siblings. I still have a good relationship with all of them, so I guess even that wasn't too bad. I liked all of my teachers, although my algebra teacher in ninth grade was upset with me that I read in her class. She really couldn't say much about that because I was still at the top of the class for the work. Another teacher told me later that he used to gauge how well his lectures were going by when I brought out my book. I was indifferent about chores--compounded by the fact that when I was a senior in high school, I got my hair caught in a vacuum cleaner. I still don't like them. I've been thinking about life today--mostly because it's my birthday (I'm 42) and it's a time to reflect. I've actually trod very lightly upon the earth. I rarely got in trouble or made waves. But, on the other hand, I hope I've done little things that made the world better for the people around me. That's the hope. I wonder if I'll ever know if I succeeded. |
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