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A third journal of personal musings |
 My life always continues to change and it only stands to reason that with each change, there should be a journal dedicated to it. |
I've been writing, a little bit, the last few days. It's been coming in spurts. A few weeks ago I was rewriting one of my oldest stories "Country Lovin'" (Really need to figure out a new title for that one  ). I've come to realize that that Covid, followed by my job losing a lot of employees (a new building was built in an area where a lot of employees were close to and transferred) and not replacing them and being shortstaffed and stressed from that, raised my anxiety tenfold and ADHD. I never really thought I had either, until post Covid. I need to get to a doctor to get them handled. I thought things were getting better at work, only for them to not really and things are just frustrating. Holding things out since one of the problems might be resolving themselves within the next month. Normally, I'd be considering a job change. Which sucks, because I've topped out and I get 2 bonuses a year (decent ones too!), but mentally man, it's been doing numbers. But thanks to the current administration, job security feels pretty non-existent for a lot of jobs I'd even consider. So, here I am for now. I think getting back into reading in a somewhat more consistent basis has been helping too. I've hated that reading also took a hit since Covid. I just couldn't focus. I'd be reading the same word, sentence, paragraph numerous times. Forget what had even happened. So, I'm glad to be reading more consistent. I'm definitely not back to what I used to be, but the fact that I can is making me happy. Hopefully that continues to keep going too. Feels better than just popping in to check email and scour the newsfeed, which is what I usually do (and try to make sure that I do that every day). Writing completes me. I can feel it build up and it's good to get it out. I think before, it just gets lost or stuck and that was never the case before. It was like an outside water spigot, but the valve handle was missing, so the water would just run free with nothing stopping it. I couldn't ever seem to be able to work a story because another one would be right behind it. Now it's the opposite problem. The valve handle doesn't seem to turn very easily and only seems to trickle. So we will see. I don't know if anyone much follows me or this anymore, but it's an update. It feels good to get it out there anyway.  |
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