I started writing my conversion story in June 2023, even though it started before then. It will not be in chronological order as I remember things from the past that brought me to this point in my life. My decision to convert was not an easy one. I grew up Pentecostal. I watched my grandma speak in tongues. My aunt played keyboard in the church band. I used to attend church (a member of a Baptist church for many years) 3 to 4 times a week. I did not start my journey of healing after my divorce and expect to end up here. However, my desire and work to grow closer to G-d has left me no doubt or question about where I am now. I have no hesitation in my conversion to Judaism. This is my story of leaving Christianity and becoming a part of a people that I will be able to, one day, proudly say that I am also. A Jew.
Baruch Hashem! I'm so glad you were added to the newsletter 🙂. I wondered how your moving went (I couldn't find your blog) I've studied with Chabad for 10 years and enjoy reading about your Mitzvahs and your bravery in all this.
I'm Jewish but in the minority here and it's a blessing to read your blog. Shabbat Shalom 🕯️🕯️
Shalom 🙂 I'm doing proofreading for our Blogging Bliss newsletter and I check the links etc. Hashem finds ways for Jews to connect in interesting ways! Most of my Jewish community is online ( we moved to Mississippi 2 years ago and good luck finding much Kosher food or anything! I long ago lived in Brooklyn but didn't know much about my Jewish roots. I've been studying online 10 years and I wish you well!
Shabbat Shalom for next week!
I have to add that I cried after writing this while doing the dishes. I dried my tears and said, "G-d, I'm trusting you." After I finished dishes and dried my hands, I received a call. I have a job interview on Friday morning.
I'm not sure my problem is justifying what I'm doing. It's not even people disagreeing with what I am doing. However, I really can't help but be hurt by people who have known me all my life and people who are supposed to (or have said they do) love me and care about me telling me all kinds of vile and hateful things. I'm not changing my mind. I love everything about Judaism and everything about the Jewish life. I know I will find more friends, but I have to move to where Jews are first!
I don't think you have to justify your actions. They have their minds made up. Hopefully, you can make a Jewish friend or two, around the same age, to help support you in your conversion journey.
I think big one reason to hurt each other is misunderstanding and afraid about strange people and things you meet. Specially you don't understand what strange people saying.
There is a point in conversion that moving forward is necessary. If this week at my dad's house has shown me anything, it is that I am ready to take the next step in my conversion process. That next step includes moving to a Jewish community. This next week I am meeting with my rabbi for the first time in person and discussing the next steps to start becoming part of the Jewish community, when I should be there to attend community functions, and how I can attend shul. This means I will also start meeting with the Beit Din. The Biet Din is a court of rabbis that make the final judgement when a candidate is ready to take the final step in conversion, the mikvah. My community that I will be transitioning into is two and half hours away from where I live and from where I work. That means, after this school year, I will not only be moving where I live, but I will also have to change where I work. I will spend the next school year straddling the line between the life I have now and the life I want to live. I'm nervous about meeting my rabbi, and I hope that I can ask questions that I need to ask and feel a sense of belonging there.
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