Erotica Harem

Carol - Thanks for the wonderful review! You made a lot of great suggestions, and I acted on at least 3/4 of them, which says a lot about my appreciation of your sensitivity!

I am so HAPPY that you caught on this quickly to how Lady Jessica is Jessica's way of vicariously living the life she wants for herself but won't allow herself to have. This motivation will become crucial in a later chapter.

As for a description of Jessica herself, yes, that is a problem. In a way I felt badly about it, but it was also somewhat deliberate. Describing the POV character is always a problem for a writer because she cannot see herself. You have to be sneaky if you want to do it. And I hear from authorities that having her look in a mirror for the description is utterly forbidden.

There is an argument for avoiding physical description. That way, a reader can identify more easily with the main character, which most readers like to do. Also, I understand that you are not supposed to make her a "tall, slim blonde" because this reinforces stereotypes of beauty and will turn off many female readers. So I chose to leave her mostly undescribed other than, as you point out, cute enough the several men are chasing her. Hopefully, this will make it easier for most woman readers to identify with her. Whether this is a good choice is another story. It's a frequent point of dissension among writers and readers.

Thanks again, and especially thanks for the tips on period dialog.

Tim